Syzygy

Scully: The map says turn right at the intersection.
Mulder: The detective who contacted me told me to turn 
        left.
Scully: At the intersection?
Mulder: At the stop light.
Scully: This isn't a stop light, it's a stop sign.
Mulder: Well, I'm sure she meant a stop sign.
Scully: Turn right. 

Scully: Where's she going?
Mulder: You don't suppose she's a virgin do you?
Scully: I doubt she's even a blonde!

(After coffin bursts into flame.)
Mulder: Maybe we're just imagining that.

Mulder: If it's no bother, if it's not too big a deal maybe 
        you could get me a few photographs of that thing 
        which bears absolutely no resemblance to an horned 
        beast.
Scully: Sure, fine, whatever.

Mulder: Personally I like to keep a more open mind.

Zirinka: Well we're heading into a rare planetary alignment 
         where Mercury, Mars and Uranus are extreme 
         influences.
Mulder: On What?
Zirinka: Office hours are 9 to 5. All major credit 
         cards accepted.

Scully: We have differing opinions but I didn't expect you 
        to ditch me.
Mulder: I didn't ditch you.
Scully: Fine, whatever.

Mulder: Go ahead.
Scully: No. You go ahead.
Mulder: No. Be my guest. I know how much you like snapping 
        on the latex.

Mulder: This may not be any time to mention it but 
        someone is wearing my favorite perfume.
Scully: Can I have a word with you?
(Mulder sniffing Scully.)
Scully: What are you doing?
Mulder: Must be Detective White.
(Mulder sniffing Det White.)
Det. White: What are you doing?
Mulder: Nothing.

Mulder: Let me drive.
Scully: I'm driving.
Mulder: Scully, it's not what you think.
Scully: I didn't see anything anyway.
Mulder: Will you let me drive?
Scully: I'm driving. (Now mad) Why do you always have to 
        drive? Because you're the guy? Because you're the 
        big, macho man?
Mulder: No, I was just never sure your little feet would
        reach the pedals. (Slams door). (Mulder, determined 
        to drive, goes to other car and gets in)
Mulder: (Mockingly) I'm a macho man... 

Zirinka: I'm just waiting for authorization. 
         (on Credit card)
Mulder: I'm a Federal Agent!
Zirinka: Last I heard, the Federal Government couldn't pay 
         it's bills.

Scully: What in hell's going on here?
Mulder: Something cosmic!

Mulder: You just ran a stop sign back there, Scully.
Scully: Shut up Mulder!
Mulder: Sure, fine, whatever.