Well, Mom sooooo threw a fit when I called her. Here's a list of my HEINOUS crimes:
Zoe was all depressed when we met up...her carpal tunnel started acting up again that day and it hadn't in ages, and she'd been jerked around by the hospital, I won't get into it all. Attempted to make her feel better, which hopefully worked.
The one conversation about this whole problem between all of us (such as it was) wasn't bad...in the car Sat. am. At least I didn't say anything or cry. The schedule next week is I see him Mon-Tues, she sees him wed, fri-sat, and I don't see him other than massage class Thurs., since I have a midterm, I thought that date would be the best. I figure I won't feel as bad if I see him that day after all for a bit. He said he "really needs" the two day thing this next week, but it's possible to change it after that so it's every other sunday or every other weekday he has off. Which sounds like an improvement...
I think what sounded so bad to me is that I think I'm getting cut out of even more time. Like this week, obviously. They were talking about how she can come here on weekdays to make time up...but I can't get time made up. I feel like I'm going to get cut down, but I can't say anything about what can't be helped. I'd just feel like a bitch if I said that too. I don't really want to cut down on her either so I get time. (More on this later)
I was going on about my not talking to him on IRC...and he was basically saying no, don't do that, I still want to talk to you. And I was all yeah, but what if I'm screwing you out of work by doing that, and he was saying he'd slack off anyway and enjoyed the nagging...I was probably giving him more shit than I should have about it, when he was obviously wholeheartedly disagreeing with me. Finally I said "fine, I'll keep nagging you until you tell me to shut up." Which is when Zoe said "You know he's not going to do that, right?" At that point I gave the fuck up. Can anybody ever win?
Went to breakfast and then to Capitola again and bought some stuff- Remington bought candles for massage class, plus he bought me this velvet top I liked in that dress store Zoe and I are addicted to. Then cleaned up the joint for her party. Jessica (surprise!) and Sarah and Sparqi (David) showed from the Davis/IRC crowd, Christy from the Berkeley crowd, everyone else was SC'ers. I was acting all affectionate again with Remington a lot of the time...fortunately Zoe didn't get all jealous like last time, even though this time she would have been justified, IMO. Not as exciting as the previous party really (i.e. no trampoline and no conspicuous drunks. Though the lack of conspicuous drunks is a good thing =), as there were people sitting around bored fairly often. Enjoyed the hot-tubbing at the end the most probably- I just LOVE this hot-tub. I was quite surprised that Sarah didn't freak around mostly naked people (other than the idea of seeing Remington or I naked) or lesbians like I thought she might. Bummed that Jessica looked bored out of her mind, though.
Sarah seems to be handling the triple thing surprisingly well...Rem and Zoe and me and her went in the spa the next day and she thought it was all cute, somehow. I may be too clingy, according to Mom (see below), but he was certainly encouraging the clinginess. Very much so.
In general the spa conversation was interesting...Zoe saying she didn't want to leave SC/trying to convince us to move, her commenting (this surprised me) on wanting a husband and kids! (Kids, yeah, but she's so fearful of monogamy...) Remington saying (after a discussion about my being a broke English major) that I could be supported by somebody rich, then cheesily smiling at me (hmmmmm). Him yanking me across the spa to be with him...that uh, surprised me.
Jess wanted to go home and do her ECS research, so we left that afternoon. Right before that, Zoe had Remington drag me up to her bedroom for a bit of private conversation. He was being all affectionate, which was great, of course...did get into the compression thing with him a bit, when I mentioned that I'd only see him Monday and Tuesday. He didn't like that...said five days was too long to not see me (until it occured to him we had class together Thurs, which cheered him up). But what can I do about that? Then he said "well, Zoe does that." So I shut up, kinda. Surprisingly I did mention my thing about nights, and he (of course) agreed with Zoe, but different reason...he wants to pull all-nighters, he said. Ugh. At that point I felt a little teary, but I kept my eyes closed and he never knew it.
Well, Mom sooooo threw a fit when I called her. Here's a list of my HEINOUS crimes:
1. Didn't call her Wed. Never mind that I had absolutely nothing to say then, she was
worried sick and was going to call the cops, etc.
2. Didn't send her an anniversary card. Not that I've EVER done anything for their
anniversary either
3. Haven't wanted to be with them in ages and ages, and she screamed and cried and made me
cry and feel like shit, etc, etc. I am sooooooooooo tired of this crap! I don't WANT to be
around them like this. And she was all "well, if your friends are more important to you,
then they can be your family and you can worry about paying for school yourself then," etc,
same threats. She makes it sound as if she really wants back the old miserable me who went
home every two weeks (would have been more if it didn't sound ridiculous) because she had
nothing to do on the weekends.
I'm forced to not go to Bill's birthday bash next weekend, or Whole Earth (well, i'll go before they pick me up). I'm just really not feeling good about her now at all. Maybe it's a good thing Rem and Zoe aren't going to be in town next weekend (sigh, couldn't convince 'em).
Mom called me back AGAIN (oh joy) to give me shit about Remington. I'd made the mistake of mentioning the whole compression thing to her, and she was giving me shit about being too clingy and driving him away (she doesn't even KNOW if I'm all clingy around him, for chrissake), and that she thinks his having two girlfriends is "against God's will." (Like I care, really...) What am I supposed to say to that? She didn't think I kissed him in front of her...well, um...and she REALLY didn't get that no one's bothered. Making me feel like shit, part 2. I know she thinks he must be good to me, but she probably wants me to find a monogamous one. She claims he'll have to choose at one point. Ugh.
Back Forth Front page Posts page
Get your own Free Home Page