Some Thoughts

• A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk I have a work station...
• Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?
• If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP?
• Does fuzzy logic tickle?
• If they arrested the Energizer Bunny, would they charge it with battery?
• I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions.
• How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
• I don't have a solution, but I admire your problem.
• If a tin whistle is made out of tin (and it is), then what, exactly, is a fog horn made out of?
• If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
• Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?
• I believe the only time the world beats a path to my door is when I'm in the bathroom.
• Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
• What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
• What WAS the best thing before sliced bread?
• If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
• Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Orientals throw hamburgers?
• Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?
• Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
• Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
• Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
• Why do we wait until a pig is dead to "cure" it?
• Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
• Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

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