Welcome to my Geography Class

Be afraid....be very afraid...

The following are many things which have been said throughout the year in my geography class... My teacher loved to make fun of our "high" intelligance level, as you will now see...

Note: All quotes without a name have been said by our teacher, Mr. Ianetta.



"I see you as the president of an Old Ladies' knitting club. Your conversation is at that level.



"The lowest common denominator is determining the orientation of this class."



"By the way, you're the anchor." (to Chris)



"I think politically, she represents the unwashed."



"I don't understand...that's the title of your autobiography."



"The reason you're not focusing is because your ponytail is moving."



"You're strong too Brandon, but smell isn't everything."



Mr. Ianetta: "If he's a janitor..."
Durso: "Thanks..."
Mr. Ianetta: "Of course I could be over estimating you."
Chris: "He couldn't be a janitor ever. He's too short."
Mr. Ianetta: "His chair might be too long, but yours are too narrow."



"Now you know why he needs two ID's...one's to check the other one."



"I think he's comparing his intelligence to an animal that has no shoulders."



"What is it with you and diarrhea?!?"

Durso



"When you're broed, tiny, trivial, inconsequential things excite you."



"Do you have digestive problems at lunch?"



"The last person who speaks will get customized attention at lunch."



"In your case, DNA means deficient neurological abilities."



"Your interest is reversly proportionate to the ridiculousness of my statements." (to Brandon)



"The Golden Age Ladies's club has more discipline than you guys."



"Tomás, you're like a speed bump, everywhere I go, you're there."



"Everytime you blow your nose you lose two IQ points."



"You're a living case for euthenasia."



"Just 'cause you're paranoid, doesn't mean someone's not after you."



"I don't want to see you talking to your psychologist or crying in your mother's bosom."



"Just because your mother tried to choke you with the umbilical cord, doesn't mean she doesn't love you."



Laura: "Oh God!"
Mr. Ianetta: "That's Mr. God to you."



"Mr. Marchand, she has many personalities, but she only uses yours in taverns and pool halls."



"Your poor judgement is only surpassed by your charm." (to Durso)



"She said she wants the air pressure outside her head to be superior to the one inside her head. It indicates a low intellectual profile." (to Laura)



"I'm not mean, I'm objective."



"I don't have kids. My wife does."



"It's like being on A&E and then switching to Sesame Street." (about Laura)



Mr. Ianetta: "What can the government in a democratic country do to increase the birth rate?"
Durso: "Put up posters!!"



"In the game of Trivial Pursuit, you'd be pursued." (to Chris)



"I don't mind her speaking if she speaks in her name. She speaks in everybody else's name."



"The symbol of Medieval life was a church. The symbol of our times is a shopping mall. It's scary."



"Why are your brain waves so disfunctional?"



"Here are the hazards of random breeding." (about our class)



"I feel like a chef in a rotisserie, "Tourne-Toi." (about Laura)



"Laura, keep quiet or I'll take the batteries out of your neck."



"Every piece of furniture can be replaced, including boys."



"Where Ricky goes, nothing grows."



"You are definitely a bot with a promising past." (to Durso)



"You're an endless source of hot air." (to Laura)



Mr. Ianetta: "Do you play sports?"
Tim: "Yes"
Mr. Ianetta: "Is it true that they have to shorten half time so they don't have to retrain you?"



"Do you head the ball a lot?" (to Tom)



"You have to look at your armpit to vote."



Mr. Ianetta: "Does your mother love you?"
Brandon: "Yeah"
Mr. Ianetta: "Good...always nice to know."



"We know you don't do anything. but do it quietly."



"Ever since your mother left you in the metro, you've been used to rejection." (to Brandon)



"I was just observing the various flora and fauna in the class."



"They're not a political party, they're wackos."



"You're not an only child, you are only a child."



"I see a problem, you guys are having fun so we're not doing geography."



Mr. Ianetta: "Is that band-aid on your desk still there?"
Greg B.: "No"
Shannon: "HE USED IT!!!!"



"You are not an unidentified flying object. You have been identified and you don't fly, you crawl."



"There is nothing more exceptional than self-canibilization."



"You have the opinion of the last person you speak to."



"In military terms, you'd be a loose cannon."



"What? You have 34 personalities? None of which are good enough so find another."



"You laugh like a hiccuping hyena."



"Your mother is a good woman. You're her only mistake."



"Why smell like a man when you can smell like a Christmas tree?"




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