Latin America Season Recap

The season of the "Big Fight!" has come and gone. Now it's time to analyze and see what this trek through Latin America was all about!

Episode Review

For a full episode analysis, check out the episode archive section.

"Ai Chihuahua" -- Broadcast Date: 01/18/99

Looking back on this episode I found I'd gave it a much higher rating than it deserved. The opening credits were insulting to mature viewers, the dialog inside the woodie was juvenile..."Hey, are you a virgin?" Oy! Plus there was nowhere near enough time for us to formalize ourselves with the cast. The Tom Green Show didn't premier until the following week. So what was the point in axing 30 extra minutes? for a BioRhythm re-run? Please.

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"Cobwebs and Margaritas" -- Broadcast Date: 01/25/99

After leaving us hanging for a week, the kids finally kick-off their 20K dash in this installment which offers a somewhat interesting A plot involving the Raramuri footrace. And a somewhat annoying B plot involving Abe who tries to seduce Holly into the sack by using middleschool tactics, ends-up using a shoehorn to pry his foot out of his trap; thus, displaying a notion a friend of mine once said..."Tis better to be silent and thought a fool, than to speak up and remove there of all doubt!"

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"Cinema Spaghettios" -- Broadcast Date: 02/01/99

And then came this fluff piece which hung on the silly premise about the Roadies shooting a spaghetti western with BMP's latest welfare recipient Paul Rodriguez....along with a few other irritating tidbits, such as the done to the death "winnie crash" which sole purpose now only seems to annoy rather than humor. The one redeeming quality here is some nicely done character development concerning Gladys giving Abe a shoulder to lean on while coping with his father's illness. However, spare me the stock conflict scene in Zacatecas where Abe and Gladys sqare-off over antics only middleschoolers would admire.

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"Trust" -- Broadcast Date: 02/08/99

When Abe secretly records Brian's phonecall to his girlfriend without his knowledge or consent, it triggers a major backlash....even from those not involved in the situation! I of course am speaking in referencing to Gladys who takes personal offense eventhough it's none of her concern. But my main problem here was with Brian's overkill of the situation...especially since he was flirting with another girl (Sylvia) just minutes before he decided to profess his commitment to his true love which he later ends-up dumping. So what was the point? But by the end, tempters subside abit when Brian and Gladys flush-out their frustrations with a little alcohol. And Abe offers a shallow apology to Brian at breakfast. The real dissapointment here is the pointless mission where the Roadies must debut their short film. A mission that should've been wrapped-up in the previous episode...thus taking-up valuable camera time that could've gone to let's say...character development?

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"Fight the Bull!" -- Broadcast Date: 02/15/99

The Latin America season continues its slow trek up the mountain with the best episode to date! It's here we finally get a thrilling mission where the kids go head-to-horn against some temptered beef in hopes of being crowned top Matador. And along with some strong character development where Gladys deals with her cheating boyfriend (Gean) back home. There's also a somewhat irrelevant C plot involving Menudo who slightly avoids becoming the third wheel in the "Willie Nelson & Co. Traveling Circus!". But since Menudo has received the short end of the stick when it came to camera time, it was welcomed. Good job!

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"Tigers and Sharks" -- Broadcast Date: 02/22/99

After only four episodes, Latin America reached its peak; In fact, I wouldn't argue with anyone on saying that "Tigers and Sharks" was the best episode of the season. The most intriguing aspect here was not necessarily the fight (Although many of you may disagree with me on that) but rather the set-up premise. You got the feeling we were building up to something...even if you didn't catch the preview, you knew all the ingredients were there for a fight: Abe woos Susie/Susie woos Abe, Gladys gets pissed/Sarah gets pissed, Abe and Susie moonlight in the woodie on Gladys's "dirty clothes". And all we need now is a match, right Abe! One thing that hit me like a freight train was this all of a sudden hostility Holly directed towards Abe. An act that only has two possible explanations: 1. Lousy editing or....2. Tampering by BMP. I'll settle for the latter!

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"Sticks and Stones" -- Broadcast Date: 03/01/99

And so hard times begin. Road Rules's wandering season was making good ground up until this point, but with this installment it began to derail! Simply put....this is not how you resolve a domestic violence dispute! There should've been some course of action taken against Abe for his part in the altercation. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure-out that Abe's deliberate name calling triggered the fight. And worse, the whole "swift justice" theme of "Sorry you're out, no ifs, ands, or buts,!" seemed two-face since the cast wasn't given a say-so over the matter, where as the Seattle kids were! However, there's a fitting Gladys goodbye scene at the end, but unfortunately it's overshadowed by the flood of arbitrary crap in this episode...easily one of the worse of the series.

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"Deep Sea Therapy" -- Broadcast Date: 03/08/99

Just for the record, if you had asked me during the week of March 7th through the 14th which season of Road Rules was the worse, I would've said Latin America hands down! To put it mildly, if "Sticks and Stones" was the stumble down the other side of the mountain, then "Deep Sea Therapy" was the point of final impact. And this episode falls flat on its face! BMP hands out another welfare check by hiring Tom Arnold to play Dr. Katz in this low brow installment that gets so silly with sexual innuendos and generic jokes it's stomach wrenching! If I were a person who had never tuned into Road Rules before, after watching "Deep Sea Therapy" I'd probably never tune in again!

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"This One's For Gladys" -- Broadcast Date: 03/15/99

And then "This One's For Gladys" did it again! If we have an episode where the cast are trying to open-up to one another, and work-out their problems; then why in the hell do we need a B plot where the gang plays duel with Molotov? If that isn't bad enough, these kids (Minus Josh) have little or no talent what so ever! But you have to give them props...It's not everyday you get a chance to climb-up on stage and make a idiot of yourself in front of millions of people. Brian: "Alright, This one's for Gladys!" No thank you, I'll pass.

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"Strike The Gold" -- Broadcast Date: 03/22/99

The remaining episodes began the up-and-down roller-coaster theme with this rip-off that managed to hook-in Abe/Holly fans in hopes of seeing some humping, ended-up witnessing some "dumping" in Mexico City. And I can not stress this enough, but why did the producers insist on airing one of the most boring mission (That was until the sleeper sandcastle contest) in Road Rules history? Sure we got a closer look into a little known youth society in Mexico, but it seemed their only purpose was to carry the mission plot along. And since I'm on the subject of BMP pawns..........

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"Into The Heart Of Darkness" -- Broadcast Date: 03/29/99

Now here's an episode with a mission that I actually showed some interest in; eventhough catching spiders doesn't exactly rank up there with croc wrestling or shark tagging, it's worlds better than the crap we were served over the past several weeks! Unfortunately what didn't work here was the stock conflict scene where Sarah squares-off with Abe who in-turn sprouts a big head when he receives back-up from his boyz (Brian and Josh). Then decides to dish-out blind threats which sends Sarah scurrying back to her bunk to whine. Plus didn't we go through this trite-wornout third act before: "Tigers and Sharks", Sticks and Stones", "Deep Sea Therapy"? I say it's time we switch gears!

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"Image Is Everything" -- Broadcast Date: 04/05/99

"Image" is a good episode due to the fact that for once this season, we actually felt like we were going somewhere with a 3 city jump, and a farewell to the woodie. However, there were several snags here. For one, the "Elephant in a Birdcage" theme where the producers see just how much stuff they can cram into 30 minutes. Plus it's so chock-full of self-contradictery plot holes you can play golf!

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"Kayaking and Kidnapping" -- Broadcast Date: 04/12/99

[I just realized the geniuses over in the production staff decided to switch titles on me.] Well it doesn't take a brain surgeon to see that there weren't any brains involved in the partial set-up in this episode. The sandcastle mission was boring, insulting, stupid, unoriginal.....oh, and did I mention it suck too! Mark My Words.....there will never be a worse mission ever again on Road Rules now that I've seen "Kayaking and Kidnapping". The only saving grace here is a nicely executed chapter arc beginning where Menudo gets nabbed and Abe gets wacked with a hacking charge.

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"El Pradator" -- Broadcast Date: 04/19/99

"El Pradator" is an episode that perfectly illustrates what this season of Road Rules should've been like in the mission department. It's an episode based mainly on set-up which successfully manages to keep the viewer tuned in for the full 30 minute duration without feeling the urged to channelsurf. Too bad I couldn't say the same for the majority of the other shows this season!

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"Handsome Reward" -- Broadcast Date: 04/26/99

Eventhough the hype had been building for months, was I expecting the gang to receive a spectacular reward unlike any other to date? A reward so awesome it would make the others before it look like chump change? Of course! That is why I expressed the same negative vibe as I did after watching the Holyfield vs. Louise fight, after finding out the awesome reward was a lousy VW Bug. I don't care if it was made in Mexico because that sounds like a cheap consolation prize you would get after losing $100 grand. But there's some nice character work here (In the form of closer) between Abe and the girls, and some not-so-nice character work between Brian and the group. However, the good and the bad weigh just about even here, so I'm inclined to straddle the fence in the rating department.

Rating:

First and foremost, I want to make it clear that this is not a Road Rules bashing site. And eventhough I wouldn't exactly rank this season as "terrible", it still fell short of what it could've been had the producers done their homework right.

I've heard many ask, "Where exactly is Road Rules headed?" If this were season one, I would've had a highly positive attitude about where Road Rules was headed as a series; but alas, that prospect has long since been rendered obsolete. The series changed purpose and direction somewhere during the second season and has never looked back. Thus contaminating the premise, yes it always comes back to the premise. What is the premise for Road Rules:

Take 5 kids, take away their cash and credit cards. Stuff them all in a winnebago, and send them on their journey where they must complete a sires of challenging missions in order to get paid. All the while trying to conserve their cash and staying out of each other's hair. And if they complete all of their missions, they'll be rewarded handsomely!

Over the past 7 seasons that premise has become so twisted--pulled, and distorted it's now looked upon as a joke! Even the whole "Roughing it" backbone ideal of the series has become nothing more than a tag line. And after viewing Latin America, I think it's about time someone step back and take a serious look at what "Roughing it" is really all about!

"Roughing it" does not mean dropping in an occasional line about your money status, the need to ration money, or the worse of all! The notion that you've suddenly run out of money "Into The Heart Of Darkness" when cash is an issue that hasn't been debated for years! "Roughing it" does not mean parking your marshmallow rumps up in a plush hotel every night when there's a mobile home at your disposal! "Roughing it" does not mean stuffing your traps three times a day at expensive eateries when you're supposedly on a budget! And finally...."Roughing it" does not mean donning yourself with mascara and eye-liner just to look pretty for the camera like you're on a movie set! This is after all a challenging adventure, not a challenging vacation!

But sadly, that is what Road Rules has become; A Lonely Planet style documented vacation--Ugh, on second thought, I take that back. At least they know how to "Rough it" on LP! All real concerns about the money situation virtually vanished by season 3 (Europe). And it appears now days the winnie's sole purpose is to serve as an attractive stage set for filming.

Why even give these kids a RV if their intentions are to sleep in a hotel every night? In season 1 the Roadies would crash at a hotel only if it was in their budget; Even at one point, going as far as to steal a room when they were flat broke. Here, the troopers casually check into a hotel like drinking a glass of water! Giving no thought to the fact that they're supposed to be on a budget!

After viewing my rants, you're probably wondering what exactly do I want to see? Well for one, I want to see some back story attached to the characters; Not just the average--"Hi! I'm so-and-so, from such-and-such, and I'm 20 something!". I want to see these people show some real concern about the money instead of dropping in a line or two every once in a while just to satisfy the producer's contract agreement. I want to see some consistency involving serious character issues. Not delivered as a appetizer, then dropped as quickly as a bad habit; a la, Brian's suicide topic in "Image Is Everything". And dammit! I want to see some interesting missions! And you'll excuse me if I sound blunt--but there were simply too many loser mission! In an average season, one should only have to endure 1 or 2 loser missions, Latin America featured 8 losers out of the 13 totaled. Such missions as: fishing with Tom Arnold (It wasn't the mission that made it a loser, but rather the host!), collecting trash, and the awful sandcastle contest makes me wonder why the producers even resorted to them in the first place!

Character interactions were rather strong this season; In fact, the entire season could've ridden on the "drama train" for all good the missions did (Which was nothing)! Furthermore, I wouldn't disagree with anyone in saying that this season should've been effectively re-titled.....Real World: Latin America Starring Abe & Gladys. Gladys and Abe certainly got the opportunity to shine this season with "Tigers and Sharks", "Sticks and Stones", and "Trust" as their strongest shows. Gladys even remained a character focus after her departure--"Deep Sea Therapy" and "This One's For Gladys".

But while Abe and Gladys basked in center stage, other characters were left in the shadows backstage. I of course am speaking in reference to Josh and Sarah; two of the most one dimensional--undeveloped characters on the trip! It's a shame, we heard NOTHING about their personal lives over the 3 months they were beamed into our living rooms. Funny how Josh and Sarah were both involved in long term relationships yet we never heard anything about them. Would it cramp Josh's Latin Lover vibe that much to give his girl and step kid a ring while cruising south of the border? Same goes for Sarah who so proudly spouted off how great her boyfriend was, yet he never even bothered to drop her a line. Yo people! It's free of charge either way; no phone company cards necessary. But instead, we get this silly--childish Abe/Holly tease fest flashed in our faces through-out the whole dang season!

And if that wasn't bad enough, you had the producers tapping into other characters personal lives and using them totally out of context! Take Brian for example. Here was a guy that the producers tried several times to bring his personal business to the table, but ended-up spilling when it was perceived as filler to pad-out the episode, or just plane out of cynic with the episode plot all together: Once again, his 3 line suicide chat in "Image" and out of the blue disgust about being on the trip in "Handsome Reward". I guess I can give Brian points for carrying "Trust", but he barely carried it!

So will I see many of the changes I expressed that should happen in this review? I hope so, but I'm afraid we may have to wait till next year. I don't know where B-M's going with Semester at Sea this summer, but it looks like it'll be something much different from what we've come to expect over the past years. Hey, I'm open to change, but only when it's practical. Just hope I'll retain the same sentiment by season's end; So don't blow it B-M!

Viewer Rating	Results
Q: How do you rate Road Rules: Latin America? (of 66 respondents) 11%   5 - Excellent. 15%   4 - Above Average. 23%   3 - Average. 30%   2 - Below Average. 14%   1 - Far Below Average. 8%   0 - I'd Rather Watch Informercials.

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