KAREL'S CHEESE HOUSE

Two Poles walk into the post office and the first thing that catches their eye is a bunch of "Wanted" posters, in particular a shot of a mean-looking black guy beneath a banner that says "Wanted for Rape."
"You know," said on Pole to the other, "they get all the good jobs."

The Pope is working on a crossword puzzle one Sunday afternoon. He stops for a moment or two, scratches his forehead, then asks the Cardinal, "Can you think of a four-letter word for 'woman' that ends in 'u-n-t?'"
"Aunt," replies the Cardinal.
"Say, thanks," says the Pope. "You got an eraser?"

A distinguished-looking man entered a Geneva bank and inquired about taking out a loan for 1000 Swiss francs.
"What security can you offer?" the banker asked.
"My Rolls-Royce is parked out front," he said. "I will be awayfor a few weeks. Here are the keys."
A month later, the man returned to the bank and paid off the loan,1017 francs with interest.
"Pardon me for asking," the banker said, "but why a one-thousandfranc loan for a man of your obvious means?"
"Very simple," he replied. "Where else can you store a Rolls for a month for seventeen francs?"

The Lone Ranger, while hunting down some low-down-murderous scum, is captured. Fortunately, Silver escapes. The bad guys decide to take Loney out into the desert and tie him down, naked, to stakes. Once they are satisfied that he is secured, they leave him to die slowly.
Silver appears at the scene. The Lone Ranger says to him, "Silver, go to town and get the posse!" Silver rears back, whinnies, and charges off to town, many miles away.
All day, in the blistering sun, the Lone Ranger survives. Just as he thinks the end is near, night falls. Though relieved at first, he begins to get colder and colder. By sheer will power, he manages to survive the night.
As dawn breaks, he hears the thundering of horse hooves. Up gallops Silver with a naked woman on his back.
"Goddammit, Silver, I said 'POSSE'!!!"

The World Health Organization recently did a resarch in determining the function of the knob at the end of the penis.

The Russians put in a million dollars and came up with the results saying that the knob is there merely to please a man during sexual encounters.

The French also put in a million dollars but came up with a different conclusion citing that the knob is there for the pleasure of a woman.

The Poles put in $2.98 and discovered that the function of a knob is to prevent the hand from slipping off!!!!

Yesterday I was driving around in the country, got thirsty and entered a pub. I was there for five minutes, when a big brown horse entered the pub, sits down at a table, crossed its legs and orderered a coffee.

I was surprised, and asked the pub keeper if this was not a little strange, that an horse orders a coffee.

"Yes", the man said, "Very strange, indeed. Normally it drinks a pint of beer."

At whether stations people have to enter several times per day the amount. On one occasion somebody typed in that amount without a decimal point instead of 8.45cm he entered 8m45. Apparently there was a test for such numbers because following error message appeared :
Build a boat. Take of all animals two : a male and a female

One day in Paradise, God called Adam to him and said "Now i will teach you how to kiss". "Lord, what is a kiss ?" asked Adam. "I will show you" said God and tought Adam everything about kissing. Adam went to Eve and kissed her for a while.
Then God called Adam back and said "Now i will teach you how to make love"."Lord, what is make love ?" asked Adam. "I will show you" said God and then he tought Adam everything about making love. Adam went to Eve but came back shortly after and asked "Lord, what is a headache ?".

John was a bit kinky. One evening he got himself a prostitute and they both went up in a hotelroom where John said ".. I got a litle .. litle favor to ask".
"OK, but you have to pay extra for that" said the prostitute. John took all his clothes off, went into the shower, turn it on and said "Now.. Take the hairdryer, turn it on and blink the lights". The prostitute turned the hairdryer on and when she started blinking the lights John moaned with pleasure. "Oh Oh man,this is great. Now I'm standing in the middle of a forest. It's raining cats and dogs and the lightnings lit up the sky. The wind is blowing and in distance you can hear thunders."
"OK OK" said the prostitute "Isn't it time to make love now ?". "Are you CRAZY" answered John "in THIS weather?".

Mrs Smith woke up one night, choking and discovered that her husband, who was drunk as a skunk, was filling her mouth with pain-killers. When she cought her breath again, she screamed "What in HELL do you think you are doing ?"."Don't you have headache ?" said Mr Smith.
"No, your fool of course not".
"That's great let's f**k".