President Bush had a chance to view the actions of evil-doers in North Korea. "Holy crap," he said to a South Korean, "they look just like you is."
President Bush continued his tour of Asia on Tuesday when he visited South Korea to meet with president Kim Dae-jung. Bush wanted to try and calm fears of war in the region, where the world's most heavily guarded border lies.
Dae-jung had long been trying to ease tensions between the two powers when Bush declared North Korea part of the "axis of evil" during his State of the Union speech.
"We has no intentions of invading North Korea," Bush said at a news conference, "as long as they don't get too smart-mouth and frisky." He also said that the United States would be willing to open talks with North Korean president Kim Jong II "when he can proves that he ain't evil."
Bush also strolled along the Demilitarized Zone between South and North Korea. At one point Lt. Col. William Miller informed Bush that axes used to kill two U.S. servicemen in 1976 were on display in a "peace museum" just over the border.
"No wonder I think they're evil," Bush said disgustedly, "what say we get a length of rope, slip over there and get some justice Texas style!"
"I'm gonna kill you," he shouted through the barbed-wire fencing.
Previously the president had been in Japan, where he met with prime minister Junichiro Koizumi. Bush praised Koizumi for his support of the war on terrorism and also offered advice on how to save Japan's floundering economy.
"You've got to spend billions and billions of dollars," he said at a press conference, "just like priming a pump back in Texas."
One Japanese reporter was confused by the word billions and politely asked Bush what it meant.
"Heck, I ain't got no idea," laughed Bush, "all I know is when I say it back home peoples eyes get big. So it must be something good."
