The federal holiday is a sort of kill-two-birds-with-one-stone event meant to commemorate the birthdays of former presidents George Washington and Abraham Lincoln. Bush, however, thought the holiday was a celebration of the presidency and expected tons of gifts from the public.

"I wasn't too mad Monday night," the president said, "because I knew that the post office was closed. But when I got up Tuesday and there wasn't anything but the usual complaints and threats in the mail...well I gots pissed."

The only unusual item in the ton of letters delivered to the White House was a box containing a dried-up dog turd, but no one is sure if that was meant to be a gift or not.

The unhappy Bush left Washington for an elementary school in Ohio, where he had children try to help him learn to read. He said that forgiving the American people would be difficult, but was something he would have to do.