President Bush dons a leather jacket in a pathetic attempt to look cool and score popularity points.
Some 150 days into his administration President Bush is scoring his worst popularity ratings ever, according to a barrage of poll results released on Thursday. The polls also showed that most think the rich are getting richer while the poor are getting shafted.
Only 4% of those surveyed by the Pew Center believed the president cared about "people who aren't millionaires like himself." In a seperate New York Times poll, 57% of Americans believe Bush favors the rich over the middle class and poor.
Unsurprisingly, the president also got a dismal rating for his handling of America's energy policy. Two-thirds of those polled, including many Republicans, acknowledged that the president and vice president were more likely to enact policies favoring industry rather than the average American.
A survey conducted by Hyperfreak Online found an overwhelming 75% of Americans believed the president did not have their "best interests at heart" and suspected he may even be "of alien origin." The poll also found 64% believing the president had "America racing down an apocalyptic highway while paying $1.85 a gallon."
The president scoffed at the polls, stating that "numbers can be shaped to any sorts of meaning that will confuses the mind of peoples. Look closely at my budget and you'll know what I mean. Besides, most Americans are liars."
Bush also said Americans shouldn't believe anything they read in liberal media and should stay just away from polls.
"Surveys are unfair, non-Christian and plain out dangerous," he warned. "Many woman die from survical cancer every year, which any fool can tell is caused by surveys. And I'll bet they hurt other peoples too."
The president then suggested that Americans don't spend much time at home "so as to miss surveys by telephone. You'd be better off just driving around in your SUV, or grabbing your credit card and hitting the mall to shop. Just stay away from hippies with clipboards."
