Following dismal poll results released last week, President Bush has seemingly changed his views on conservation and the enviroment. On Thursday he sent his energy policy to Congress, which included several million dollars for renewable energy research.
Bush also visited the Energy Department, where he toured displays of energy-efficient vehicles and appliances. He was impressed by the technology and even suggested that someone design "a car that runs on pee. That'd be cool."
The president also announced his plan for stricter standards on "vampire appliances" such as computers, battery chargers and televisions, which draw energy while not in use. He then appointed Secretary of Energy Spencer Abraham as official "vampire slayer" of his administration.
Abraham accepted the nomination by driving a stake through the heart of a Sony DVD player and claimed he would not rest until he struck fear into the hearts of all undead machines made by "little people overseas. You know what I'm talking about."
Bush also promised to instruct the federal government to become more concious of energy conservation "because apparently it's important or something."
White House spokesman Ari Fleischer later confirmed that staff had been instructed to turn off lights and computers when not in use to help conserve energy. He refused to answer questions on how much money could be saved by simply turning off power to the Oval Office since it is rarely used by Bush.
Although the end result is a positive step, critics contend that Bush is merely acting because of public pressure and Republicans desire to capture more seats in the upcoming political run for Congress.
"Remember that (President Bush) has got an enormous ego," claims Pavel Shebman, a political consultant for CCN News. "His sliding popularity probably grates on his nerves, and I'm sure those polls really made an impact."
Jack Jackson from the prestigious Center for Political Humor agrees. "At least it made him do something positive for a change. Maybe someone should do a poll seeing how many Americans want to see him get his ass kicked on TV."