The Secret Service had their first test of White House security today when a gunman caused havoc outside the southwest perimeter of the presidential residence. The shooter, later identified as Robert Pickett of Evansville, Indiana, was shot in the knee by a Secret Service agent and taken to a local hospital for surgery.
Speaking to reporters at a mid-afternoon conference, White House press secretary Ari Fleischer said that the president was never in any danger. The president, who was laying on the floor of the Oval Office playing a videogame at the time, had no idea about the conflict outside.
"As governor of Texas he was used to hearing gunfire at all hours of the day and night," Fleischer said. "He kept up what he was in the middle of."
Secret Service agents went to Indiana to search the suspect's home and interview friends and neighbors of the man. Those who knew him were surprised by his actions, having described Pickett as a nice, quiet individual.
"He was an accountant, he did my taxes," one unidentified woman stated. "Maybe he went bonkers thinking about relearning all that tax stuff if the president gets his tax-cut plan approved."
Another man, identified as Hank Druthers, said that Pickett may have had mental problems. He told Secret Service agents that Pickett had recently come under the care of a psychiatrist, a Dr. Caligari, who had just moved to the area. Attempts to find the mysterious psychiatrist were uneventful, as the office was abandoned and Caligari had left a false forwarding address. Druthers said the doctor shouldn't be too hard to locate, however, as he "looked an awful lot like Vice President Dick Cheney."
Cheney, who had just returned from an unspecified trip, was also in the White House at the time of the shooting. Likewise, the vice president was not in any danger, as according to onlookers the gunman fired a few shots wildly and then jumped into a bush. The vice president seemed upset about the shooting, grumbling that "no one listens anymore" but further stated that although he was "disappointed" about the incident he was still "optimistic about the future."
