Spechtreum IX
Draconis Blackthorne's Shadowmantium
TLC: Pact With The Devil | Hell: The Devil's Domain | Revelation 666 | Hell: Our Fear & Fascination | Inside The Church of Satan | The Secret Lives of Women: The Occult | Edward Scissorhands | The Devil's Child | Shadow of The Vampire | The Mummy | Night of The Living Dead | The Funhouse | Nightmares | The Haunting | Bless The Child | Final Destination | Little Nicky | Bell, Book & Candle | Pact With The Devil | Welcome To Planet Earth | Knight Rider | Wonder Woman


Pact With The Devil
The Learning Channel

TLC: Pact With The DevilThe presentation begins with a stern warning, that some viewers may find content disturbing, as it deals with controversial images and subject matter - so right away, one's curiosity and expectation is piqued. - it should at least be quite dramatic - and it is. Rendered in a style reminiscent of Geraldo's "Exposing Satan's Underground", which was basically a sensationalistic nerve-tapper focusing more on urban legends than actual Satanism, although the few minutes of Our actual philosophy demonstrated tends to be more than enough to get the message across, and really stands upon its own merit - ironically, it may prove to be far more intellectually disturbing to the viewer, and the journalism source than the lurid accounts of blood and gore fabricated to gain attention. The dichotemy of displaying those alleged criminal acts perpetrated by stoned metalheads garnering their foolosophical misinformation from albums and horror films, versus that of actual representatives of The Church of Satan can be quite engaging, and in My opinion, further goes to exemplify the difference between devil-worship and true Satanism; plus, it seems to add more of a mysterious and dangerous connotation, which adds an extra exciting element overall. As a matter of fact, it is rather "fun" to view these types of "shockumentaries" wherein we know where the truth lies, like a black diamond in the rough.

Despite a promise made by the producer to COS Administration to NOT contact the following individual {which was a decision as to whether or not Our participation would be granted}, included herein is ex-FBI agent and hack Ted Gunderson, who still clings to the SRA fables, despite being debunked in an exhaustive investigation by that very agency. It seems that he is desperately grasping onto any faint strings of notoriety he can, evident in the quack video "evidence" he dramatically produces from a safe, which upon observation by a professional forensic analyst, is clearly an awful hoax inconsistent with forensic characteristics, perhaps even initiated by Gunderson himself to preserve his media presence at all costs.

screen shot from Ritual sequenceBy far, the high points consist of Magistra Barton countering some of the common claims made by the ignorant, as well as offering enlightening and educated commentary about the Satanic religion, with scenes of an impressive ritual sequence conducted by this very writer.

Apparently, the producers slummed and also filmed with some pseudo-satanists who add to the urban mythology about cult sacrifice by claiming knowledge of such, plus they look like hippie-Goth clowns to boot. For the record, whoever they are, they are in no way connected to The Church of Satan, and are definitely out of their league. They embarrass themselves well.

The rest of the show involved a news story so named "The Nightmare on Elm Street", obviously after the film series, which involved four or five losers who huddled around a nut to form a cult of drinking buddies called "Order of The Lion" who, probably after a bout of narcotic abuse, decided to murder a couple of other wastrels on an actual street named "Elm" - upon observation, there seemed no direct connection with a so-called "satanic crime", and I have a feeling the motive probably had more to do with a failed drug transaction or simple robbery. And finally, more lowlife criminal activity with a relation about some whack-job who ungratefully murdered his parents for the sacrificial purpose of using a decapitated head for a "Black Mass" {there is no such pre-requisite for Le Messe Noir, by the way - all one has to do is read The Satanic Rituals by Dr. Anton LaVey to realize this}.

Overall, with the exception of the brilliant Church of Satan sequences, the program seemed a product from the paranoid mid-80's to early 90's; and as such, is about 80% fiction, 20% factual. It is surely worth the acquisition for those choice segments alone, as well as for the evocative thrill.

Hell: The Devil's Domain

A surprisingly more in-depth look at the mythological history of Hell from various belief-systems, including Jewish, Muslim and Buddhist depictions, as well as the ever-present christian accounts. It seems that the media have expanded their research much more, including de-facto Satanists Mark Twain {book: Letters From The Earth} and Benjamin Franklin, with accounts of the Hellfire Club of early America. The ubiquitous "witch" tryals were discussed, the SRA urban legend, "possession" {Catholic and fundamentalist christian tales}, and devil-worship, serial killer criminality, with various theologians and authors including Dennis Prager, speaking on the simplistic "good and evil" dualities; but the cream of the crop came towards the end of the program in the segment entitled "Friends of The Devil", which displayed scenes from Satanis {with a brief clip of Dr. LaVey from those legendary interviews}, Speak of The Devil, and showed hard-cover copies of The Satanic Bible and The Satanic Rituals {no doubt owned by the Citizens featured herein}, and a performance of The Destruction Ritual; also included is an interview with Magus Gilmore. A solid segment, devoid of a pro-blindlight slant by the media as was typical in presentations past.

However, I must take issue with one inaccurate comment made by the narrator who stated that Our major practice is 'The Black Mass' - not true. 'Le Messe Noir' would be performed as the celebrant is moved to do so, as it is a cathartic purging of any lingering blindlight influences, and is furthermore, a ceremony {which serves to sustain}, not a ritual {which serves to attain}. The Satanist is more apt to perform rites dealing with Lust, Destruction, and Compassion, as desires manifest.

The rest of the presentation was filled with magnificent hellish art from Rennaissance and pre-rennaissance eras, including one of My favorites, Dore', who illustrated Milton's Paradise Lost {I must say that the piece on Milton's literature accurately depicted Satan as the prideful rebel, glorious in countenance}; as well as Dante's Inferno, who interjected personal 'demons' into his work, to regain the favor of The Catholic Church after his ex-communication, by essentially "ritualizing" his dark-subconscious in this fanciful fable which the church took to their bosom.

Overall, a well-put together 'documentary' on the nether-regions, and their effects on the human psyche - i.e., scare them into church.

* More information on the show here.
Revelation 666
FX Channel, 5/10/XLI

Radio Free Satan's 666 EveSplashing upon the screen tonight, a hand comes forth with the dreaded '666' triumvirate scarred into flesh. The dreaded 'number of the beast' was the topic of display, including surprisingly basic and ubiquitously stuporstitious explanations of how it supposedly relates to Nero Caesar, Napoleon, Hitler, the internet, and even former president Ronald Wilson Reagan, the latter who just happened to have lived at a triple six address for a time.

Reverends Moore and Saenz made brief appearances, although with very few exceptions, this tends to be the typical media modus operandi, but is usually enough to get our message across. It was a delight to see the "Sintennial" 6/6/6 Eve poster displayed thereon however; and brief opinion statements were made by metal band Society One, inclusive of a display of demonic tattoos.

For some reason, the directors decided to focus an excessive amount of time on some man in a wheelchair relating his various misfortunes, who just so happened to be born in '66, where that time could have been better used to include the ritual sequence performed by Rev. Moore and Priestess Saenz, as well as more of the interviews in this half-hour presentation.

Sneak peeks of the remake of The Omen were shown {in My opinion, the actor playing Damien seemed a little too gaunt}, with commentary by the director who related an interesting story about how a portion of film was mysteriously destroyed during the ending sequence wherein the 'Antichrist' birth mark is revealed. Could it be true? In any case, it makes for great propaganda.

The other guests seemed rather inconsequential, and even gratuitous, but the apocalyptic hellish artistry and dramatic music were amusing.

HELL: Our Fear & Fascination
{VII/XIII/XLII A.S. 20/20}

Heaven & HellNot since 20/20's "Devil Worshippers" program which instigated the 'Satanic Panic', has this show concisively covered such diabolical subject matter; so now there appears "Hell: Our Fear & Fascination", which aired on a Friday the 13th, attempting to explain the current populace's arcane pre-occupation with The Underworld, from literal to figurative.

What is Hell?

In a sort of "Hell: The Devil's Domain" vain, this segment covers a brief visceral summery of various religions' versions of Hell, and discusses the metaphorical etymology of the origins of Gehenna.

To Hell and Back

Observes the mythological recall of the brain in a state of stress. Features an interview with a person who claimed to have gone through an N.D.E., or "near death experience", which is essentially a hallucination, bringing various subconscious archetypes forth to a dying brain.

The Face of Evil

Features a brief thirty second interview with Magus Gilmore speaking on the principle of Lex Talionis, and a display of some wonderfully dramatic footage from The High Mass, inclusive of Magister Diabolus Rex immolating a parchment in the candle of destruction. It has been My experience that even though our segments tend to be brief, that is usually more than enough to express our point, as the undefiled wisdom of the statements stand for themselves, from comments from those legendary Satanis interviews with Dr. LaVey, to those of our current representatives. Plus, it may not necessarily be what the producers wish to showcase, as they tend to focus on horror scenarios and the dualistic mindset, rather than the Third Side perspective.

A needlessly extensive interview with a murderer follows, a broken animal who committed needless crimes, tattooed with cheap jailhouse ink, is where he belongs living out a living Hell behind bars in pathetic abstinence, and whose interview was completely predictable.

A Modern Heretic

Focuses on an ostracized preacher with an alternate version of "Hell", where it is right here on earth - on this, it is agreed. It is up to the individual to create whatever existence for oneself, although his perspective deals with an earthly 'test' to paradise beyond the grave...

Heaven and Hell are semantic terms describing personal and worldly states of existence, nothing more. Religions of the past created all manner of fantastical threat and promise to regulate their congregations and keep the herd in line, at a time when church and state were fused, the idea of a celestial overseer may have been necessary to lull the simple populace, always at the determination of king and clergy. This is no longer necessary in an increasingly evolving culture, where the more evolved may focus on ethics, and law enforcement devoid of external superstitions.

Journeys into Hope

Relations from three people who experienced severe and brutal circumstances, from a raped nun, a former child soldier, and a Holocaust survivor.

Overall, Hell: Our Fear & Fascination is a rather topical report on this phobia, but does manage to display in a basic sense, the shifting mentality of white-lighters towards more agnostic definitions; as technology develops and reason incrementally prevails, even these religions are becoming mere shadows of their former fundamentalist selves, and even for the herd, that is certainly evolutionary progress.

Inside The Church of Satan

{XLIII A.S., Shadowbox Entertainment; A documentary by Joshua P. Warren, 2+ hrs.}

Inside The Church of Satan [insert]Arriving at The Haunted Noctuary today, in a non-descript package containing a treasure in our history - over 2 hours of uncensored material covering events both at Black House North and visitations with several members in NYC, including extensive interviews with Magus Gilmore {another delightfully-thoughtful exchange with The High Priest; particularly amusing was the question about being 'The Antichrist'!}, Reverend Christopher Mealie, Witch Stephanie Crabe {Motel Bizarre}, the ever-misanthropic Magister David Harris {Satanism Today}, the elegantly erudite Magister Lang, Magistra Diana DeMagis {the "Horny In Hell's Kitchen" apron is priceless}, Reverend Akula, and Musician Warlock Eric {HellofAllHells}.

Inside The Church of Satan [custom cover by Storm]Beginning with a listing of Our basics, and Halloween celebrations with some locals, the majority of the presentation centers around footage of touring about Magister Lang's superb Lair {except the exterior, to avoid possible bigotry}, building towards The Rite of Ragnarok Ritual from The Satanic Scriptures, with delightful glimpses into some of the many themed rooms of Black House North, where we also get to meet the resident hellhound Freya. There's the impressive Egyptian Library {spotted is the Dr. LaVey statue by Arkham Studios, a painting of Vlad Tepes, a Markus Mayer sculpture, several books on Rasputin, and a sarcophagus bookshelf containing an extensive collection of Lovecraftian bibliography}, the woodland bedroom, a room of angles and geometric shapes, the amusing Jayne Mansfield and Marilyn Monroe bathroom, and of course, via a secret panel, the elaborate Ritual Chamber which has an even deeper secret room within through coffins {"backstage", as it were}. A great touch, considering 'The Red Room' at Dr. LaVey's Black House was accessed through a sarcophagus. Along with a marvelous trapezoidal pillar and actual pitchforks framing The Baphomet, there's Coop's Church of Satan poster, the Magister James "Sinister Minister" Mitchell action figure, and a painting of Our Founder decorates this Inner Sanctum.

Finally, amidst somber candlelight gleaming upon the Sowulo rune pentagram on one side, and Fenris on the other, the ritual begins with the ringing of the bell, and to the martial drumming of Warlock Eric, Magister Lang utters potent enunciations of destruction and regeneration echoing through the darkened room, yielding a flawless performance by all participants.*

Other moments include a satirical invocation by Warren himself, with Special features including a 'sacrifice' parody of The Satanic Panic hysteria.

Overall, this professional, impartial presentation displays the varied personalities and projects contained within Our Cabal, with proper unexpurgated representations of our philosophy, sans the typical inaccurate spins of sensationalizing 'journalists', which is why Mr. Warren was selected. A truly unique documentary which will hopefully inspire others in kind.

Hail Loki! Hail Satan!

* Personally, instead of the occasional night vision mode, I would have opted for more dark-sensitive cameras and/or a small bit brighter lighting {a-la Satanis / Speak of The Devil}, to capture this historic event.

The Secret Lives of Women: The Occult
{WEtv; 16 September, XLIII A.S.}

Heather's Bio | Show promo

Priestess Heather Saenz is featured in this presentation about women from all walks of life - in this case, those involved in The Occult.

Showcasing their Lair in Carlsbad, CA with Reverend Moore, she takes a drive around the neighborhood in their elegant black hearse, and takes a stroll up the street, as well as performances of a romantic Compassion ritual, and an invigorating Destruction ritual. The hearse as well as Priestess Saenz herself definitely display the Lighthouse Effect in such a seemingly wholesome, though charming location by the ocean.

Relaxing in the living room with Rev. Moore, she reading from The Satanic Bible, discussing points of our philosophy was particularly pleasant as well. Also displayed was Rev. Moore at work in the studio completing the H.P. Lovecraft tribute statue. As one who possesses the Anton LaVey tribute statue, I can attest to the exquisite detailing and quality of his work. The couple compliment each other well, very notable as they dance together while gazing into each other's eyes, is truly a touching sight to behold.

Along with Satanism, there was also a so-called 'vampire' / domanatrix {stereotypical type hanging around in a graveyard} , and a weakan {some gnome-like female creature}, diminishing drastically in comparison to the sexy and vivacious Satanic Witch, who definitely stole the show.

Edward Scissorhands
{1990 c.e., Directed by Tim Burton, Starring Vincent Price, Johnny Depp, Wynona Ryder}

"...before Edward came along, it never snowed here."

There amidst mediocre and complacient suburbia, above the pastel and stucco eyesores of the herd's domiciles, imperiously stands the shadowy dominant mass, Lair to one Edward Scissorhands {Johnny Depp}, tragically left alone without human hands by the premature death of his father-inventor {Vincent Price}, who taught him the noble virtues of deportment and civility. The local Avon-Lady "Peg" {Dianne Wiest}comes around seeking to sell her wares {she is actually more gutsy than anyone else in that town}, slowly making her way through the lambent corridors into the darkest recesses of the castle, until finally perceiving movement in the delapidated attic, but despite her frightful impression, she decides to relocate Edward down with her into the booboisie dwellings. Surprisingly, her family takes a liking to the gothicesque character, clothing of tight black leather, straps and silver buckles, pale complexion, dark eyes, crowned with spiked and disheveled hair - sort of a cross between Robert Smith and Hellraiser's "Pinhead" {I always thought the latter character should have had more of a regally infernal name, something like "Lord Asmodeus" or some such, but I digress}, redressing him in the common accoutrement of the culture.

As his presence becomes known, the local frustrated and busy-body housewives, especially one processed Tom Jones-listening lushful tart, begin yammering it up with intrigue and petty gossip, and in her case, lustful intent. And another, a comical jesus-freak who warns the other women to beware, that The Devil has arrived - when not spreading paranoia, she sequesters herself in her hovel praying and playing her organ. Edward's natural talents manifest as he attempts to settle in, displaying remarkable skills in imaginative hedge-trimming, hairstyling, and ice-sculpture, making him a neighborhood sensation with the ladies, although his charming naivetee' belies his fearsome appearance.

He becomes infatuated with the family daughter Kim {Wynona Ryder}, who eventually reciprocates his sentiments, despite the efforts of her bullying jock 'boyfriend' Jim {Anthony Michael Hall}, inclusive of framing him for a robbery, and persistent name-calling. Through this pretentious attempted integration, Edward remains the outsider frequently displaying noble personality traits and inherent superiority, with a desire to repay the consideration given him, but instead is himself reciprocated with hypocrisy, ingratitude and hostility by the rabble. He finally reaches his tolerance level and decides to return to his total environment, his own black haven, but is pursued by Jim, the misdirected masochist, who is subsequently justifiably punished for his antagonism.

Sadly, Kim and Edward cannot live together because of these events, so she returns to the town and lives out her days in regretful contemplation, eventually relating the story to a grand-daughter one snowy night. In a most memorable and pathos-inducing scene, still as a nubile maiden, she twirls and dances in the snow produced by Edward's Magical ice creations, raining down upon the town. Apparently, being a Magical creature himself, Edward does not seem to age, but continues producing his marvels perpetually.

What this film does seem to display are the results of solipsism and pretentiousness, which are answered with ignorance and insensitivity by inferiors, despite his sincere efforts, his productive alienation is inevitable, and he remains in the purity of his darkly divine autonomy.

The music is hauntingly beautiful, conjured by Musickal Magician Danny Elfman, whose eclectic orchestrations I thoroughly enjoy through their many manifestations. The aesthetics are enthralling, replete with trapezoidal angles and awe-inspiring perspective. I especially appreciated the sweeping staircase and the enchanted garden.

Edward Scissorhands is a romantic escapade into the life of one de-facto characterization of the outcast, who proves to be just too distinguished for the boorish populace.

Rating: 5/5.

The Devil's Child
{1997 c.e. / XXXII A.S. Directed by Bobby Roth; Starring Thomas Gibson, Kim Delaney}

A deal is made with The Devil by a girl's mother in which her life is spared from death by a fall. Years later, the girl, now a woman, Nikki DeMarco {Kim Delaney} moves into the big city and is greeted by a mysterious and suave stranger named "Alexander Rotha" {Thomas Gibson, who you may recognize as "Greg" from the "Dharma & Greg" series}, in a swank apartment complex, with whom she is immediately smitten. They indulge in the Satantric Sacrament, and she becomes pregnant, which is a diabolical miracle in itself, considering her childhood accident, as explained by a Doctor during a checkup. In one scene, she actually seeks to have an abortion, but the clinic explodes in flames before she can harm a hair on the infernal progeny.

One day, Nikki is taken aback due to attending one his ethics classes {he is a Professor at a local college} with the subject of "good and evil", wherein he fulfills his role as accuser, exposing the hypocrisy of a self-righteous 'slut', sending her weeping out the door. Knowing that she his carrying his child, he understandably seeks to remain in contact with Nikki, but she becomes increasingly frightened and runs from him. Bit by bit, she starts asking questions and becomes aware of his nefarious identity, going forth to protect herself while seeking blindlight assistance from a paranoid priest {Father Dominico - a temporary obstacle}, who eventually falls to his own death within the church wherein he was just praying.

A seductive emmisary of The Prince of Darkness enters the scene to be rid of a nosey ex-boyfriend named "Tim" {Matthew Lillard}, via lethal fetish-play.

A-la Rosemary's Baby, the entire society of people she associated with are all in league with Lucifer, including the Psychologist, and even her best friend.

At one point, she develops a photo of Alexander revealing the dreaded Damienesque '666' on his forehead {they could have used a better effect for this, or at least a better font! At least Damien's appeared like a convincing scar}. Despite her efforts, she gives birth to Satan's son, which is attended by Rotha stealthily and gracefully moving about the hospital in a black cloak.

Eventually, she kidnaps the child and runs into a church where she admonishes a priest to perform an on-the-spot baptism, with Rotha appearing outside. Chaotic winds increase, eventually subsiding as the last words of the litany are read. He departs, but will no doubt take his due when the time is right. I muse that one day the child will realize He is a Satanist, and gravitate towards 'The Dark Side' upon reaching adolescence.

In My estimation, The Devil's Child is a combination of Rosemary's Baby and The Omen. What I particularly enjoyed about this film, is that for the first 90 minutes or so, the plot is very subtle with an air of believability instead of overt displays of exaggerated theatrics {which is quite enjoyable otherwise, but it just 'worked' for this presentation}, then eventually maximizes towards the climactic finale.

Shadow of The Vampire
Was the vampire Max Schreck portrayed in the original `Nosferatu' an actual demon of darkness? That is the premise of this film, with the mysterious aura of Schreck haunting the celluloid frame. The characterization of Count Orlock {John Malkovich} is excellent , playing an actual vampire who hailed from a family of vampires in Hungary coaxed to play the role with the promise of the director's wife as a reward. The director turns out to be the true villain with the streak of madness bourne of obsession for his profession - "Scientists in the creation and preservation of memories." Indeed.

The cinematography contains an eerie quality to it, running from full color to sepia, to black and white, gracefully transitioning to preserve the arcane quality, in effect placing the viewer in that era with the excellent element of realism. Bit by bit - fist a cameraman, then a writer, begin disappearing and turning up dead, husks drained of blood, which frustrates Murnau, for it causes delays as he must replace each one. Finally, they must travel to Heligoland for the final scene, of which the Count is reluctant, which is a trait of the Vampire, that of preferring to remain one native soil and one's preferred created environment {ergo, the legendary home soil in the coffin}, yet he agrees to travel for the fair neck of the actress, which he does eventually savor, after abstaining for far too long. Unfortunately, the Count is betrayed by Murnau and ends up evaporating in that famous ending scene.

The legend that has been attached to this film since the beginning was a brilliant ploy to gather controversy and viewers, not unlike the gimmick created around The Blaire Witch Project.

Nosferatu preceeded the Bela Lugosi Dracula, which was actually the original intent, but Murnau could not secure permission with Bram Stoker's wife; It was `Dracula' which began the suave, romantic depiction of The Vampire, whereas Nosferatu focused more on the original monster , a grotesque emaciated corpse, but who is not without his own charms. In one notable moment while Orlock was conversing with two actors, he suddenly takes up a rat scurrying by, and forthwith begins partaking of its blood with a slurp as sort of a late night snack. The crew believes him to be an eccentric character actor whom none will see out of `costume'.

Overall, the archetypal Vampire takes his rightful due, but is betrayed by an unscrupulous mortal in the ende.

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The Mummy

Peter Cushing portrays an archeologist in this classic Hammer film about a descendant of the ancient Egyptian Magicians who manage to enlive an ancient Sorcerer of his kind, by the necromantic rites of The Egyptian Book of The Dead. The ancient sarcophagus was unearthed from its tomb and taken to England, which is seen as a terrible blasphemy, and the inevitable Curse begins to unfold.

The Mummy is reminiscent of the actual story of "Iye" {pronounced "eye"}, whose tenacious deceit brought him the Pharaoh's title for a time, after the murder of Tutenkamun and what would have been his Princess. The Egyptian is determined to kill the Anthropologist and almost succeeds through the Mummy, but the monster is distracted by the beauty of his Grand daughter {I will attest to her exquisiteness}, who reminds him of the beauty of the ancient princess. Twice her beauty thwarts the elimination of the Archeologist, until the Mummy finally takes her up in classic style, and runs off with her down to the swamp {romantic in an Addams sort of way}, where he is summarily destroyed.

It was actually quite a romantic scenario which brought the Mummy nigh. He was determined, in his original priestly mortal form, to bring his love back from the dead - so he stole away into her tomb where the embalming process was already under way, and uttered the Word of Spell , but was found out by the Elder Priests, who then sentenced him to be sealed up alive in the sarcophagus to be her guardian for all time.

Karloff plays a most excellent Mummy, every bit as good as his portrayal of Frankenstein. A classic must-see.

Night of The Living Dead

The horror classic which inspired such other subsequent classics such as 'Dawn of The Dead' and 'Day of The Dead'. A truly dark presentation both aesthetically, literarily, and literally.

Radiation has cause the dead to rise and hunt the living for sustainance. A few people turn a house into a fortress to shield themselves for the carnivorous advances of the walking dead. Veritable ghouls who seek to consume living flesh.

Personalities and wills conflict within the fortress, which eventually leads to the necessary murder {execution} of one of the inhabitants, followed by his family, who all subsequently arise, but are dispatched by the resident leader of this desperate and frightened troop. One tribulation after another, they battle valiantly against the zombies to protect the living, only to be shot square in the forehead by what would have been their rescuers, who mistook him for a ghoul. A dark ending to a dark film.

This film is devoid of the typical 'happy ending' pollyanna scenario propagated by poop-culture, which is actually why, I believe it made such a cinematic impression that inspired a genre from filming technique to the plot.

The Funhouse

"Two young couples decide to spend a night in a carnival funhouse, only to witness a murder. Now they find themselves trapped by the sadistic funhouse owner, and his deformed, psychotic son. This exercise in horror was directed by genre regular Tobe Hooper (Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Poltergeist)." - jacket description.

Two young couples venture into the underworld of the Carnival, behind the wholesome facade of Rockwellian depiction, to reveal a world of murder, sadism, and physical contortion. No one escapes the Funhouse. The laughing fat lady echoes jovially throughout the makeshift fair grounds, seemingly amused by the eustress of the rubes who subject themselves to the many freakish attractions and displays, including a two-headed cow. Yet nothing quite compares to the dreaded fun house, where all manner of shadowmantic manifestation lays dormant to arise from the dark side of the minds of the observers. The couples witness too much for comfort, & are heralded into situations of true distress, from the menacing stare of the showman with his menacing dialogue, to the twisted horror of the lusts of his horridly-deformed son, of whose monstrosity The Elephant Man cannot compare.

From the grotesque clown heads who laugh diabolically, to the actual homicidal intentions of the inhabitants, The Funhouse provides an environment of true horror amidst the couples. Only one girl survives, yet is driven insane by the terrors of the Funhouse.


This presentation contains 4 chapters of shadowmantic horror. Immediately, we course through a darkened landscape cracking with magma, as if Hell is bursting up from beneath. We are met with two glowing red eyes staring deep into the soul. A splendid introduction.

Chapter One: Maniac.

A small suburban town is terrorized by a maniac lurking in the woods, preying upon unsuspecting girls. He has already struck twice, yet besides this nefarious news, a young woman ventures forth into the night to purchase cigarettes, a compulsion she cannot purge. To her annoyance and fear, she runs low on gas on the way back, and pulls into an isolated station, wherte she is met by a qiet attendant, who serves as her savior when the said deranged lunatic appears from the back seat. There is a delightful twist, as one assumes the violator to be the gaspumper, only to become her savior in the end, when the true maniac attacks.

Chapter Two: Videogames.

A crafty teenager proficient at the playing of videogames uses the Art of Deception to gain some well-earned money from a cavalcade of gangscum who initially saw him as prey - but it turns out that it was he who was the hunter, who then makes a hasty retreat back to his own environment from the delapidated garbage low town.

He becomes obsessed with a particular game, and is determined to defeat the alien personage displayed therein. His obsession leads him to excel the levels of electronic battle, until he finally reaches the previously seemingly unobtainable 13th level which became a crossover from the 2nd dimension into the 3rd. He must also do physical battle with the various nemesi therein, until final victory laboriously obtained, only now, he becomes the guide to others seeking the mysterious 13th level......

Chapter Three: The Benediction.

Of the four chapters, this is this writer's favorite. A priest {who will be recognized as the actor from 'Millenium'}, stressed by the various funerary occurrences taking place in his parish, just becomes sick and tired of it all, and decides to leave his church somewhere out in he desert. He packs his bags, and embarks upon a journey that willlead him into a confrontation with The Devil Himself, who persues him sadistically within a sinister black car, complete with tinted windows and an inverse cross hanging from the review mirror. Nice touch.

Chapter Four: Night of The Rat.

A well-to-do couple experience the toils of vermin infestation so saturated, that they know no peace. It eventually is revealed that this particular breed of rat is surnamed "The Devil Rat", and it takes the wise efforts of a seasoned kind-hearted occultist to alleviate the problem, but not without a tragic end.

Nightmares is an enjoyable film in regeur of Creepshow, with one horror leading to another. The storyteller is the dark subconcious, and the bonfire is the flame of fear. Recommended entertainment.

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The Haunting

A film that is absolutely recommended for the entrepeneur of parapsychology. Herein, is described actual manifestations of spechtral activity, brought to life to be actualized in a past story bent from the 60's, in a classic remake of this wonderful film based upon several visitors to this old house in order to determine whether or not it is haunted. However, in this presentation, modern effects are used to accentuate those scenes which were left to the imagination before - although it is questionable whether or not these were a positive inclusion or a negative. Personally, I would side with the original, in keeping with the perceptions of the originator of the horror genre, as it is ultimately more mystical or "creepy", if the various ghostly manifestations were left to the imagination. Still, it must be expressed that the effects created for this film are up to CGI calibre. I would side with the original Myself, in that the scenes are left to be personally experienced for the deeper experience of a haunting. Actually, I believe actual parapsychologists were consulted for the manifestation of the details of ghostly apparitions. And it is well done.

Dr. Marrow is assigned to care-take over several participants in an experiment in sleep deprivation, which hold various personality traits which serve to ultimately accentuate the atmosphere. There is a sensitive personality, who has been sheltered all her life while taking care of her mother, who eventually becomes an avatar of the forces in the house; another who is an adventurous sort, a brunette bisexual lovely; & others who fill the other various traits such as the jock {who resembles 'Flash Gordon'}; & the doctor who initially summoned them all forth. Interestingly, two of the entrants disappeared from the movie completely, never to be seen again.

They all eventually discover that the house to be haunted, by a deranged former owner whose spirit has possessed the house so thuroughly that his essence permeates the property completely, to the point where his very essence, or "soul" manifests in the very beams, the ceiling, the furniture, & the furnishings thereof, which by & by shows itself in various manners, to the horror of the inhabitants.

Bless The Child

A little girl named "Cody" supposedly representing the "light side" is born, whom which is heralded by a bright star shining in the heavens like the nazarene fable. A cult-leader takes on the role of Herod in attempting to capture this special child, labelled herein as "The Slaughter of Innocence", in the process, murdering children born in the same week, much like that presented in Omen 3, which displayed the same dynamic. At first, she is misdiagnosed with autism, for being so introverted, but steadily begins demonstrating supernatural abilities, particularly in the telekinetic vein, which catches the attention of one of the cult leader's lackeys; the cult-leader charms his way into the life of the single, drug-addicted, thieving & emaciated mother named 'Jenna', who dumped the child with her older sister Maggie O'Connor {played by Kim Basinger}, who takes the child as her own, until the lowlife 'mother' returns with the Cult-leader to kidnap the child, in order to brainwash her towards the 'Dark Side', or to sacrifice her if she does not turn to darkness. The cult is more reminiscent of Scientology in its aesthetics & iconography, rather than some satanistic cult, although the adolescent thugs match the gothic/devil-worshiper criteria. Which in one notable scene, beat the hell out of Christina Ricci's character {a little goth-(...)}, eventually decapitating her in a subway, through the behest of demonic entities circumnavigating the area as she is beaten into a bloody pulp. . A nice effect.

The demonic manifestations witnessed by Basinger's character at various spots are remarkable, given marvelous life. The whole story, after she is chased down by the cult to retrieve the girl whose attempted re-kidnapping in a poignant scene lands her in her car traveling in the opposite direction on a bridge highway, at which she crashes into the edge, the car teetering on the verge of plunging into the rushing river, but she is rescued by a burley angel who dematerializes - that is one thing that is noticed now & again, these "angels" appearing here & there to help her & the girl along in various places, rescuing them out of some tough spots, where they would have otherwise surely perished. As the angels appear, so do the demons manifest themselves in the various "humans" surrounding the cult-leader, whose henchmen speed around in a black limousine {reminiscent of Mike Warnke's fictional "The Satan Seller"}.

Jimi Smits plays an occult investigator {a-la Randy Emon}, who is pictured briefly leafing through The Devil's Notebook among his collection of occult books, although the camera does not once close-up on it, but instead shows the back from a distance - but does display a "photo" {looks photoshopped} on one fabricated collage of Dr. LaVey in horned cowl.

The materialization of Satan in a converted church {surrounded with flying, graceful serpantine black demons} is splendid {recollections of The Devil's Rain comes to mind}, transmogrifying from a legion of rats {likened in the Francis Ford Coppola version of Dracula} onto an infernal throne behind the altar, upon which the little girl awaits to be sacrificed, or to rule the world, depending upon her decision. She is prepared in a bridal gown, brought forth by two black robed cultists. Well, she decides for the blindlight, & is "delivered", as it were, by etherial angels who distract the cult-leader, who is then shot by Smits.

The movie does play in the typical binary scenario of good vs. evil, so of course there is the demoralization, but The Devil is not confronted directly, but only makes a brief cameo appearance as described above.

The villain {played by Rufus Sewell} & his organization described in this movie are in the newage description, complete with an insignia which resembles the pyramidical O.T.O.'s, with the caption "You Are Your Own God" {so at least there is a minimal portrayal of Satanic philosophy}; although the ideology presented herein is more akin to a bug-eyed satanified Jim Jones.

Included in this DVD are interviews with director Chuck Russell, as well as with the actors, & allows to jump to various scenes throughout the film. And the cover portrays a striking inverted cross comprised of flames. The film is not Satanic per se, but can be entertaining with the suspension of disbelief.

Final Destination

This film could just as easily be named "Murphy's Law" for the undercurrent dynamic occurring, composing the entire plotline.

A planeful of high school students are off to France - as they prepare to take off, one of the students receives a morbid vision while dozing off, that the craft will dismember & burn. He awakens startled by the lightmare, to find that he indeed is on the same plane, as a couple of subtle cues are revealed to confirm his vision. He panics, & is escorted off the plane along with his friend, a nemesis-antagonist, his girlfriend, & a beautiful solitary girl who decides, luckily for her, to heed his warnings, although she also has a touch of clairvoyant sensitivity herself. As they are detained by security, they all witness the said aircraft explode in the air. Subsequently, all those that are involved with the clairvoyant meet with a gruesome fate.

Of note, one girl, depressed by the events, seeks to alleviate her mind with a mugful of vodka, but the mug mysteriously forms minute cracks which leaves a trail from the kitchen t the den area, where lays the PC - several drops cascade into the monitor causing a spark, & eventually an explosion, which sends a shard of glass into her neck, causing her to bleed profusely, upon which she slips & slides on her own blood, stumbling towards the kitchen, where the cutlery falls into disarray; at this point, a shower of sparks ignites the trail of vodka, & the fire persues her until she is aflame, after which a butcher knife dislodges from its holster, dropping down, impaling her.

Such scenes typify the ghoulish deaths throughout the film, all of which are deserving of a D.O.A. {Drac's Overkill Award}. No matter how much each survivor of the plane crash tries, The Grim Reaper takes His due in abundance.

Also mentionable, is the death scene of his friend, who is hanged by the bathtub shower cord - the `water' which he slipped & fell upon seemed to follow him around the bathroom as an sentient organism.

The clairevoyant seems cursed from the beginning, a complete blight / pariah.

His one-time nemesis now recognizes that they must cooperate together to attempt to supercede the morbid course of events, but is eventually decapitated after urinating on himself after being rescued from a deadly game of chicken with a train. As hard as they tried, the seatbelt would not disengage, & even the locks settled in to ensure his demise, but at the last moment, the clairevoyant managed to rescue him.

And the very last victim is spared only because of the self-sacrifice of the clairevoyant, thus breaking the chain.

This film is recommended, as it is highly amusing, & will give one a couple of moments to ponder. The death scenes are excellent, particularly in the various twists & turns upon which they come about, & leaves one ironically prognosticating what the next great overkill will be.

Little Nicky

The demonic costumes are splendid, the plot is most intriguing, which had something to do about The Devil falling to pieces, & his only hope to re-establish Himself & return to The Infernal Throne depends on the efforts of His son "Nicky" {Nicodemus}, a mentally-deficient, character with a touch of retardation, & a touch of cerebral palsey. Nicky subsequently discovers that his mother is an angel, a real floppy-headed bunny-type, the vapid blonde stereotype, who somehow eventually grants Nicky a second chance to defeat a hellish aspirant to The Infernal Throne, who foils Nicky's attempts at every turn, & redundantly proves to be stronger & craftier than he.

Nicky learns to "release the Evil within" at the council of his Hell Hound, a transmogrified familiar with a persistent libido, who along with Nicky, impresses a couple of Metalheads who become his lackeys, who are consistently awed by Nicky's inherent sinister attributes. In the end, the irony lays in the manner in which he must defeat the antagonist / interloper, with the aid of his mother the angel to benefit his Father.

Interestingly, a distinction is made between "Lucifer" {played by Rodney Dangerfield} who is Satan's father & is seen as "the Founder of Hell", & whose uproarious & classic sense of humour keeps the demons in fits of laughter.

So Nicky evokes his dualistic nature by learning to conversely evoke "The Good Inside", which manifests as a "rainbow ray" transforming the immediate environment into a flowery, foo-foo laden bright & shiny lightmare.

Towards the end, during the final battle sequence, none other that Ozzy Osbourne makes an appearance to demon-strate one of his most infamous exploits, & as an aside, Hitler also gets his in the end.

Highly recommended for many maniacal laughs.

Bell, Book, & Candle
{1958 c.e.; Starring James Stewart, Kim Novak, Jack Lemmon. Directed by Richard Quine.}

An underground society of Witches and Warlocks reside in the darkness of the big apple, congregating at a secret swank night club known as "The Zodiac". Stewart plays an unassuming publisher living in a posh apartment building just above a witch {Kim Novak} who takes a liking to the mortal, and thus casts a love spell on him, to which he is powerless to refuse, to his eventual delight. Bit by bit, to his initial disbelief, he begins to realize that these magical people are a reality, and together with an author {who himself was summoned from Acapulco by enchanted luminous paper, which strongly reminded Me of the immolation of the parchment}, they begin to uncover this occult world of witchcraft, seduction, and intrigue.

Enjoyable scenes include the justified mental torture of Stewart's temporary fiancee', with a combination of blasting horns, strobe lights, and a well-timed shriek by Novak's lokian warlock brother. And he is quite a character himself, primarily using his powers for flipping street lights on and off, changing traffic lights, and sexual conquests. It seems that because of her pretentious nature, she was also terrified by storms conjured by Novak in an art class, for being a critical lying sneak. All justified recourse. An author becomes wise to this secret society of witches and warlocks {yes, the film does make an appropriate distinction}, thus, with the suprising cooperation from Novak;s brother, decides to publish a book on the subculture, much to the chagrin of Novak, who was planning on marrying the mortal Stewart, even though it is allegedly against "witch policy" to do so. She fears that his knowledge of her true being would frighten him away.

Another thing that witches are supposedly unable to do is shed tears {LIE}, which is thwarted in a scene when her feline familiar "Piwacket" takes to the street, and much to her surprise, tears flow down her face. Novak casts a spell with the use of her familar and a memorable little tune she humms, wherein she prevents the publication of the revelaing book for the good of urban witchdom. She does, however, reveal what she is to him, and after some convincing events, finally accepts her and has actually truly fallen in love with her. despite the initial charm. They are finally wed, and could not be happier, even though she does end up losing her 'powers'.

A delightful film overall; the characters are cultured, the accounts about Witches and Warlocks are about 70% correct, which can be overlooked for the fictional plot, which is devoid of the demoralization process. I Am sure that this film did in large part inspire the Bewitched series.

Rating: 4/5.

Pact With The Devil

Based on Oscar Wilde's classic "The Picture of Dorian Gray", this film "deals" with a common stage hand named 'Lewis' {Ethan Erickson} who makes a pact with The Devil in exchange for wealth and fame, and ultimately, to fund his passion for photography, which merely became an erstwhile segueway to his self-imposed damnation. Immediately, upon dabbing a mirror with his blood one stormy night, he begins experiencing an increase in the quality of life, as all his desires and indulgences are met. A rather mysterious man with the unlikely name of "Henry" {Michael Mc Dowell}, detects potential in him, thereby granting his favor by making him a super-model, to which he takes advantage of a marvellous lifestyle of carnal delights, and all he has to do is essentially "strike a pose", while remaining youthful and handsome forever, while his hidden portrait assumes old age - but wouldn't you know it, he eventually dissappears and becomes an ingrate. At one point, he becomes essentially a "kept man" in the manse of a European couple wherein he becomes the surrogate lover of a gorgeous brunette while her husband watches on - that relationship eventually leads to a lethal extreme. The prodigal eventually returns to the source of his fortune, and not being able to handle fortune and fame, eventually commits suicide and reverts to his so-called "true form", reminiscient of Nosferatu. So The Prince of Darkness goes back to the drawing board and seeks out another hopeful who may appreciate the gift so graciosly conferred.

What I primarily enjoyed about this film is that it did not rely heavily upon the typical exaggerrated aesthetics of the mythos, but kept the storyline subtle enough to lend an air of pseudo-believability in a contemporary world.

Rating: 3/5.

Welcome To Planet Earth

A delighful "black humor" film about a very stereotypically American wholesome family unit of tourists who just happen to be... aliens. They land on a rooftop in a ghetto and meet "Joseph" {Christopher M. Brown} with the hopes of renting a couple of rooms from him. At first, he is puzzled as to why such a "white bread" trio would wish to stay there, but all doubts are erased when he meets their buxom blonde nubile daughter "Daphne" {Anastasia Sakelaris; as they decide to use the salacious angle, which usually works more often than not}. They obviously derived their unrealistic personalities from television, to essentially "do as the natives do" when in a strange land, or in this case, planet. In the spirit of adventure, the parents go forth for some slum sight-seeing, and in their outings, come across various thugs and cretins who seek to victimize them, but are met with a bloody surprise at each occasion, which makes for some memorably hilarious scenes.

Eventually, they become carried away in the sport of hoodlum-slaying; and in one particularly humorous encounter, "Rhonda" {Shanna Reed; aptly described as 'Betty Crocker'} poses like she is passed out in an alley way, when a group of neo-nazi punks {seems like this is a multi-cultural cesspool} decide to gang rape her, when "Charlie" {George Wendt} appears to attempt to dissuade them from taking advantage of his wife {done very tongue-in-cheek}, they do not heed his advice, and proceed to pummel him - so as one mounts her, he gets trapped in her leg-vice, and eventually, all are dispatched - yet the most hilarious sequence occurs when one is quite literally beaten to death with his own dismembered leg, after which it is time for some picture-taking, so she merrily performs a three-legged can-can.

Yet Daphne also unexpectedly becomes involved in the bloodshed, when while out on a date with Joseph, is cornered in the bathroom by his former acquaintance, to which he is justifiably eviscerated.

Eventually, all this interstellar tourist-play incites the attention of the Police, who because of his former criminality, persue and incarcerate Joseph; yet is freed by Daphne after incapacitating the entire station by first stripping naked, then immobilizing them with a blue paralysis ray which emminates from her purse. Two officers in particular discover the scene, and the chase is on. They rejoin with her parents who had previously acquired an automobile by first hitch-hiking for fun, then slitting the worthless hoodrat's throat; evading the squad car, but eventually run out of gas {damn those human technicalities!} near a crack den run by another former criminal acquaintance of Joseph's, and after being again under-estimated, effectively 'clean house', but not before being attacked first. And that is the modus-operandi with each and every occasion - the prevailing attitude is essentially "give Me a reason" - they ask the scumbags to stop, and when they proceed, they are destroyed.

Unfortunately, Charlie and Rhonda end up in prison due to Daphne's last-minute subterfuge, yet they still manage to provide entertainment for themselves among the resident inmates.

These alien characters employ a gleeful vigilanteism which is both darkly hysterical and refreshing. It is not surprising that this film remains underrated, for it proves to be far too disturbing to the herd, as it employs imaginative overkills with a cheerful sense of humor, committed by projected charicatures of exagerrated herd idealizations, circa Eisenhower.

Rating: 5/5.


"A young man set on revenge. His partner... an indestructible car. .... A lone crusader in a dangerous world....the world of....the Knight Rider ..."

Knight Rider has remained a favored presentation of Mine ever since I became aware of it as a Dracling, and it is no wonder it held a natural attraction, considering that upon analysis, it is obviously replete with Satanic principles throughout!

KITT ['Knight Industries Two-Thousand'; The Infernal Machine]

Not only is KITT a manifestation of Artificial Intelligence, which we are major proponents of, from the aesthetics demonstrating The Command to Look {The Lighthouse Effect}, but also the fact that it was built for a governmental weapons plan called 'Promethius', seems a very obvious contemplation, as Promethius is another iconic representation of the Satanic, and a very appropriate one.

In the Greek myth, the iconoclastic Promethius brought the flame of life and forbidden knowledge to mankind, with a myriad of cultural correlations.

In the latest version, "KITT 3000" is a Mustang, quite a beautiful model, looking much more "muscle car" in this production, rather than the sleek Trans-Am of the KITT 2000, which still remains in first place for My taste, yet I would still not hesitate to operate either nonetheless. Instead of the uni-strobe coursing all the way from one end of the visor to the other, it is comprised of two side by side, which has a certain appeal, although the single strobe is more preferential in My observation, rather like a Cylon from Battlestar Galactica.

In its interactive interface, the only real difference seems to be that KITT has an accompanying visual screen which can now bring up images and graphs to accompany the information related. KITT can also morph into other models by modifying the molecular structure of the hulk surface.

KITT's disposition is quite Spockian, although [he] seems to eventually develop a sense of empathy.

Michael Knight

I have always found Michael Knight to be very Batman / Bruce Wayne like. Son of the original by the same name, Mike Jr. is also an Army Ranger {whereas Batman is a Ninja, and Knight Sr., a former Cop}, although every bit as carnal and roguish as The Hoff's characterization. At once a scoundrel and a gentleman, a lover and a fighter, displaying a perfect synthesis of the two.

Whether in a turtleneck, leather jacket, or suit and tie, Knight is a sharp dresser, certainly not displaying a lack of aesthetics. Besides being skilled in the technical processes of operating and driving KITT, he is well trained in the Martial Arts.

Knight and KITT compliment each other very well - for besides being partners, it could be analyzed that they both represent a Yin-Yang dynamic, both halves of the cerebrum fused into one entity; KITT is the analytical, while Knight being human, expresses the more passionate / emotional.


Knight Rider movie: When KITT's designer Charles Graiman's life is threatened, a new Knight Rider must be found, discovering him in Michael Knight's estranged son by the same name. To amend a debt and save his friend from some thugs, Michael leaves to gamble up the money owed in Sin City, but when his former girlfriend appears with KITT seeking his help while being stalked by Black Hawk agents, Knight instinctually steps forth, quickly acclimating to the situation, and to KITT. The chase ensues through dangerous canyons until the final confrontation at a Bates' Motel-like location, amidst a grove of weeping willows, where his mother meets her unfortunate demise. After outsmarting the Black Hawk agents, he is asked to assume his new role, at first declining, but after meeting his father Knight Sr. {The Hoff!} at the funeral, his 'destiny' seems clear, and Knight Rider rides again...

The plot is quite similar to that of the 'Knight of The Phoenix' pilot episode. However, I found this latest presentation to be about average, but definitely superior to the forgettable "Team Knight Rider" in My opinion, but as is often the case, sequels and remakes do not surpass the original. It does have a tendency to grow on one, however. We shall have to see what develops.

Wonder Woman - The Complete First Season

Wonder Woman was undoubtably an early E.C.I. for Me, with her flowing black hair, pale skin, and crystal blue eyes, not to mention her knock-out physique. She seems a female version of Superman, and even Captain America, in most respects as well, with her alter-ego of Diana Prince, which seems equivalent to Clarke Kent {even though it was billed to be in response to the Batman series at the time}. This Solstice, LB received this gift from acquaintances, and watching it with her brought back quite an evocation, revitalizing lustful ponderations. Lynda Carter really is an amazing beauty {also a former Ms. USA}, unsullied by current depictions of enmasculated "womyn", and does carry a glamorous charm about her, really seen when she twirls for her transformation.

Set in WW2 era America, the primary enemy throughout the series are the Nazis, devising several ingenious ways to infiltrate the government, and when their plans reach too close for comfort, WW appears to save the day, "in her satin tights", along with Mjr. Steve Trevor {Lyle Waggoner}, who becomes more or less her sidekick, since being stranded on this uncharted isle in The Devil's Triangle after a sky battle. Born on Paradise Island, an 'amazonian' utopia, she enters into an "olympics"-like event incognito, proving to be the most formidable contestant, and much to the chagrin of her mother, who desired that she stay with her and rule as warrior Princess, cannot deny her daughter her destiny, who then proceeds to enter the outer world of mere mortals to battle the Third Reich. With her transperent plane, bullet-proof bracelets and truth lasso, she becomes the legendary heroine of comic book legendry.

I was also delighted to discover that Wonder Woman's mother is portrayed here by none other than Carolyn Jones, yet another ECI evocation, whom you will remember as Morticia Addams; and even through this role, her elegant demeanor shines through.

WW became a representation for female strength without compromising the glamor inherent in the female species, which is womens' greatest asset, and that is a truly powerful combination.

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