Legolas kills the puck. (Head from Orlando Multimedia. Body from The Detroit News).
(ed. Don't look at this picture too hard. It starts to look funny.)  

May 17, 2003

DOM-LAND, Middle Earth—The Dom-Land Caribou tripped up the Ithilien Rangers —literally— to grab a 1-0 series lead in the battle for the...Left Conference title. The 'Bou opened the playoffs with a convincing 3-1 win at the Merry-Go-Round...Rink...Thing Where a Penguin Plays a Banjo.

The play was pretty open with both 'Bou defence...personages frequently jumping in to help the offence, and Gandalf had to be pretty sharp to stop the opportunisitic Rangers. The 'Bou goalie made 34 saves.

"He was huge for us," said Strider. "He kept our hopes alive."

Frodo opened the scoring with a nifty wrist shot that caught the Ranger goalie looking the wrong way. Faramir scored the equalizer five minutes later. Boromir and Aragorn chipped in the other 'Bou goals, much to the delight of the Banjo audience.

But the entire crowd leapt to its feet when Pippin executed the most exciting play in hockey (as far as Bubbles is concerned) on Ranger #5, the little guy vs. the big guy. After a Caribou turnover in the neutral zone, Ranger #5 came blasting down with a head full of steam toward Gandalf. Pippin darted in front of the charging Ranger and with a battle cry of "Yeeep!"...ducked. Ranger #5 did the most amazing layed-out triple flip, landed with a plop and skidded over to the corner where he became one with his prone position and gasped a lot.

While the crowd went bonko over the hit/trip, teammate Merry had a slightly different observation about his friend and linemate.

"He yells like a girl," said teammate Merry at the post-game press conference.

"You should all be so lucky," said Rohan Rider Eowyn who had watched her husband, Ranger Faramir, from the stands.

Pippin threw a cupcake at Merry.

Notes: The Uruk-Hai won the first game of their series against the Ringwraiths 1-0. Lurz scored shorthanded late in the second period and Kgzggkhgh, the Uruk-Hai goalie, made 28 saves.

Notes II: Read about the aftermath of the Elfhead concert at the Merry-Go-Round...Rink...Thing Where a Penguin Plays a Banjo here.

Notes III: View all the Dom-Land pictures and how they came to be here.

Notes IV: If you sent me something, see it here.

Playoff Primer

1) Each round is a seven-game series. Basically, two teams play each other until one team wins four games. That team wins the series.

2) There are no ties. If a match is tied at the end of three periods, the teams will play 20-minute overtimes until one of them wins or they both drop dead. In the case of dropping dead, all members of both teams have to be completely dead. The game will then be temporarily postponed.

3) The teams who have qualified for this year's playoffs are:
The Dom-Land Caribou
The Ithilien Rangers
The Uruk-Hai
The Ringwraiths

Whoever wins the Caribou/Ranger series will go on to play the winner of the Uruk-Hai/Ringwraith series for the Orlando's Bloomers trophy. (Bubbles would like to remind everyone that the poll that chose the name of the championship trophy was really weird.)

4) Although there are traditions of throwing things onto the ice in the NHL during the playoffs, (i.e. the octopus in Detroit) the MEHA has strictly forbidden the throwing of cephalopods. This measure was taken to prevent the injury and/or death of anyone trying to capture The Watcher in the Water.

5) As soon as she can, Bubbles will post the poll/quiz that will determine how the 'Bou do in the playoffs.

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