Gandalf, Montreal Canadiens;
Strider, New York Rangers; Boromir, Boston Bruins; Sam, San Jose Sharks;
Legolas, Detroit Red Wings (last year's Stanley Cup champs); Gimli, Toronto
Maple Leafs; Pippin, New Jersy Devils (current Stanley Cup champs), Merry,
Philadelphia Flyers
June 14, 2003
DOM-LAND, Middle-Earth—The Dom Land Caribou enjoyed their week off while wating for the outcome of the Uruk-Hai-Ringwraith series. The team did a brief photo-shoot in NHL uniforms for a hockey magazine.
Gandalf enjoyed the change from the heavy goalie equipment. "I'm quite honored to wear the Habs' sweater," he said. "And Saku Koivu's for that matter." The wizard-goalie spent the rest of his week off taking naps.
"I get to be the Stanley Cup champion!" said Pippin who wore Patrik Elias' uniform. "Does this mean I get to kiss the cup?" (Bubbles thinks Patrik Elias could've been a hobbit. A very tall hobbit...)
"You've got to win it first," said Merry who opted for Simon Gagne's jersey. "I don't know if you'd wanna kiss our trophy, though. It's called 'Orlando's Bloomers!'"
Frodo was particularly amused to wear Bob Probert's uniform and struck a Probert-esque pose. "I'm a tough guy too." (Bob Probert is one of the all-time leaders in penalty minutes in the NHL.)
"Oh, I missed this uniform," said Legolas who last year helped the Detroit Red Wings to the Stanley Cup championship. "And I miss the octopus tossing. That was good fun." The defence elf used the rest of the week to rearrange the hair products in his locker.
The rest of the team more or less were tickled to wear NHL jerseys. They were even more tickled to have practice cancelled.
Boromir went online to manage his ebay.com auctions.
Strider took a short fishing trip while his queen volunteered to take over the administration for the week. During his short holiday, the king of Gondor studied under a world famous cooking guru who taught him how to make proper fish curry.
Gimli dug a big hole.
Sam spent time with his family catching up on the Eurovision contest. "Them schoolgirls shouldn't be undressing on television like that," he said. "You don't see Shire-folk behavin' like that."
The finals start next week.
...The Ringwraiths defeated the Uruk-Hai 4-1 to earn a date with the Caribou in the finals. The traditional post-game handshake was uneventful, the only uneventful moment of the evening. A total of 84 penalties were called during the game including two game misconducts against the Uruk-Hai. The on-ice officials were forced to call security at one point.
Notes:
Now that the 'Bou are in the finals, it's up to the fans to decide how
they should end the season. If you haven't seen Bubbles' hat yet, see
it here. Now, guess how much it cost Bubbles
to make that hat. If you guess correctly, the 'Bou will win the championship.
If you don't, well there's always next season (unless you're Patrick Roy.
Heh.) So choose. But choose wisely. UPDATE!!!
The 'Bou are currently losing. You may want to reconsider your vote...unless
you're a Ringwraith fan. This Poll is Now Closed
Notes II:
Read about the aftermath of the Elfhead
concert at the Merry-Go-Round...Rink...Thing Where a Penguin Plays a Banjo
here. Notes III:
View all the Dom-Land pictures and how they came to be here.
Notes IV:
If you sent me something, see it here. Playoff Primer 1) Each round is a seven-game series. Basically, two teams
play each other until one team wins four games. That team wins the series. 2) There are no ties. If a match is tied at the end of
three periods, the teams will play 20-minute overtimes until one of them
wins or they both drop dead. In the case of dropping dead, all members
of both teams have to be completely dead. The game will then be temporarily
postponed. 3) The teams who have qualified for this year's playoffs
are: Whoever wins the Caribou/Ranger series will go on to play
the winner of the Uruk-Hai/Ringwraith series for the Orlando's Bloomers
trophy. (Bubbles would like to remind everyone that the poll that chose
the name of the championship trophy was really weird.)
4) Although there are traditions of throwing things onto
the ice in the NHL during the playoffs, (i.e. the octopus in Detroit)
the MEHA has strictly forbidden the flinging of cephalopods. This measure
was taken to prevent the injury and/or death of anyone trying to capture
The Watcher in the Water.
~~~
The Dom-Land Caribou
The Ithilien Rangers
The Uruk-Hai
The Ringwraiths
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