Control and Codependency
in the Church

What happens when there is:

What will the pastor do?

"When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy!."

The Five Stages of Progression of a Cultic, Abusive Church

STAGE 1: *People feel loved and wanted. *Prayers are answered.
*Fairly good counsel is given.
STAGE 2: *Fear begins to come. *Subtle criticism and threats begin. *The controller beomes idolized.
*The controller begins to play the "blame game." *False prophecy comes forth.

*Some people are "catching on" to the abuse, so the controller instructs to avoid them.
*The controller sends members to spy on "uncooperative" members, or even on those who have left.
*Sexual immorality and financial irregularities begin to appear.
STAGE 4: *Police, Social agencies, and/or Government agencies begin to investigate.
*Most people have left, leaving a super-co-Dependent group.
STAGE 5: *The controller begins to act in a paranoid fashion. *The controller often threatens death.
*The controller often tries to take his Co-Dependents away to an isolated place to avoid authoriites and family members.
*At this stage, there is complete brainswashing and total control over the Co-Dependents.

One key might be to not leave the churches altogether,
but to pray AGAINST the spirit of control, and FOR the pastor and elders.
Although you might be required by God to leave a particular church,
be careful about not going to church at all.

Whenever you have an individual who claims
a direct pipeline with God and has no accountability,
if you don't have a cult today,
you will have one tomorrow."
-Norman Geisler-
You should always go to Church on Sunday
because it makes God happy, and if there's anybody
you want to make happy, it's God. Don't skip church
to do something you think will be more fun like going to the beach.
This is wrong! And, besides, the sun doesn't come out at the beach
until noon anyway.
Danny Dutton, age 8
Church Control Poll
Do you feel that there is too much control in churches?

Way too much
Just the right amount
Need more control


Recommended Websites

1. An Excellent Site!
Ministry Health

2. From Charisma Magazine

3. From Montrose Baptist Church

4. Eric S. Weiss

4. From the Available Light website on the process of leaving

"Many evangelicals, lacking creedal formulas or strong denominational organizations, tend to galvanize around charismatic preachers, who all too often fall into the trap of pandering to popular tastes and prejudices in order to shore up their popularity. Survival on radio or television depends upon the conjoined twins of ratings and contributions, so the temptation to play to the audience--whether by providing entertainment, by offering shallow affirmations or sensational predictions, or by reinforcing the prevailing political nostrums-becomes too great to resist. At that point,a different form of 'fidelity,' fidelity to the gospel, is sacrificed on the altar of popularity and approbation."
from Christianity Today Magazine, February 19, 2001 issue, "The Wireless Gospel"

Recommended Reading
Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People To Think For Themselves by Steven Hassan
Exposing Witchcraft in the Church by Rick Godwin
Churches That Abuse by Ronald Enroth
Recovering From Churches That Abuseby Ronald Enroth
Healing Spiritual Abuse: How to Break Free from Bad Church Experiences
by Ken Blue
The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse by David Johnson and Jeff Vanvonderen
Twisted Scriptures: A Path to Freedom From Abusive Churchesby Mary Alice Chrnalogar
A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23 by Phillip W. Keller
Breaking Christian Curses: Finding Freedom from Destructive Prayers by Dennis Cramer
Terror in the Name of God by Jessica Stern

Dictatorships in Governments

Large church picture courtesy of Jo O'Donovan at:

small church pictures courtesy of:

Church poll form courtesy of

knight courtesy of:
Barry's Clip Art Server