I think a great philosopher once said, "Sometimes shit happens in your life that is worth making numerous webpages about, Henry." Or maybe it wasn't a philosopher, unless one of the many voices in my head decided to take up philosophy as a hobby. No matter who told me to do all of that crap, I wrote pages that are hopefully more entertaining than a bunch of hamsters dancing around to the only song more obnoxious than "Who Let the Dogs Out" by MC Antichrist or whatever the hell. The old crap's at the top, the newer, not-as-crappy stuff is toward the bottom. About Me The original page where I vaguely establish who I am and insult things that are dear to me, such as my school, my hometown, and my fascination with jokes about handicapped people. Wanted: A Decent Woman I pour my heart out to you people about how I could use a girlfriend or two. My 2001-2002 Schedule As many of you may or may not know, I go to school. At this school I have a schedule. On that collection of pages I talk about it. Shmuck or Sex Symbol? Apparently, I create the misleading illusion that I'm a miserable bastard lacking all morals. Here's a page where I try and hide the truth from all of you. About This Website Ever since I started working on this website, people have been asking me questions. Okay, so maybe they haven't, but if they did, this is the page that would answer them. Senior Open House Invitation High school was the best seven years of my life. Now that it's over, I have to have an open house, which is basically a time for kids like me to visit with friends and collect money from generous relatives. Minor Recognitions During high school the average smart kid accumulates a truckload of accolades and other ways of people to pat your back without just giving you money, which would be better. Here, I highlight my achievements. Henry Vs. College I've been in college for over two years now and I haven't really mentioned it all. So after not updating for a year I halfassedly threw together this page about my freshman and sophomore years.