BACK TO FRASER'S FRACTURED FICTION
Adventures in Decorating, part 4
by A. Fraser and J. Hontz
Part 4
© Copyright 2005 A. Fraser and J. Hontz. All rights reserved.
While the monks on the floor gibbered and the men stood
over them threateningly, Genevieve slipped to Adele's side.
"Cherie," she said in low tones so as not to attract
attention from the males, "can you show me somewhere I can
freshen up, so to speak? It has been a very long night so
far."
"Of course," Adele smiled. She knew better than to think
that this beautiful vampire needed a bidet, but showed her
into one of the hotel bedrooms with an adjoining bathroom
all the same.
Genevieve ran some cold water in the tap and splashed it
over her face, then came back out and sat down on the bed.
"Mon dieu," she sighed, closing her eyes for a second.
"I am so tired. It is a long drive to Paris from my home."
"I didn't know that vampires could be tired," Adele said.
"We do not sleep," Genevieve replied, "nor are we subject to
the same...Bodily failings as humans. But yes, we can be tired."
"Did you really kill those monks?" Adele asked after a moment.
The blue eyes met hers in a direct, no-nonsense gaze. "Yes,"
was the simple reply, without a trace of regret. Or of pride or
arrogance, for that matter. "They had a silver knife, blessed
with holy water, and they were trespassing in my home."
Adele coloured and looked away. For a moment Genevieve
thought that Adele must hate her for this admission, but
then Genevieve saw a tear slide down Adele's cheek.
"Cherie, what is it? I had no choice," her voice was soft.
Adele then turned back to meet Genevieve's eyes. "I've
killed once. I.. I did not like it."
Of almost anything Adele might have said, this was the most
unexpected. She was a mere girl. And a slip of one. This
wasn't how Genevieve had seen her.
Genevieve patted the bed beside her. Adele sank down onto
it, and her body shuddered as she left out a deep sigh. They
did not touch, however.
"I know it needed to be done. I too had no choice. Still...
And.. I..can see things. Horrible things. I've learned to have some
control of this, so I do not see ... but sometimes...."
Then, perhaps because she was unhappy she'd shared so much
with a woman she hardly knew, she changed the subject. "Who
was Claude? Why would they want his ring?"
Genevieve took out her chain again and studied the object in
question. It did not look as if it was worth killing for.
"Claude was my second husband," She said, clearly carefully
thinking about her answer. "He was a master vampire, the
prince of all France; all vampires in France answered to him.
He was my turnsire. He ran something very like the Brotherhood of
Darkness." She smiled suddenly. "Only better organized. He
was murdered by a cruel and evil vampire who objected to his
work. Only his hand, with this ring still on it, was
returned to me. I never found the rest of his body."
On an impulse, but one she did not regret, Adele hugged the
other woman. "I'm so sorry," she said. "That must have been..."
A gentle smile answered her. "It was a very long time ago,
cherie. But thank you. I cannot imagine there is all that
much power in this ring, but those monks seem to think so."
"They must be insane," Adele said. "Attacking you, and
Julian, and me and Mitch..."
"Speaking of the men, I suppose we should go back. They do
fret so. Jean gets so upset if I am out of his sight."
Adele gave her a funny look. "But he was being very
attentive to me. A little too attentive, frankly."
"Yes, I meant to have a little talk with you about Jean."
The younger (technically) woman sighed. "Is this where you
tell me to keep my hands off him because he's yours?" she
asked dolefully.
Genevieve looked genuinely surprised, and then amused. "I
should have thought the problem would be keeping his hands
off you, cherie," she replied.
"But you... he... aren't you...?"
"Yes... and no." Gen looked as if she was trying hard not to
laugh. "Jean is very much his own creature, Adele. We have
an understanding. If he bothers you, tell me, and I will
speak sharply to him. He must heed what I say. Not because I
am his lover, but because I am his turndam."
Adele digested this as they walked back towards the men.
"Vampires must have very complicated lives," she decided.
"As they say in America, you don't know the half of it."
____
Meanwhile, back with the men and the monks and Mabel...
"...Well, I think we've learnt all we can from them. Shall
we kill them now and dispose of the mess? After all, they
are rather ruining a perfectly good evening." Julian looked
around brightly at the vampires.
One of whom was missing, he noted, along with Adele. Girl
talk, no doubt, although it was hard to associate Genevieve
with anything girlish.
"Yes, kill them," said Jean contemptuously. "What possible
good are they?"
The monks were very pale, Spencer very green.
"No," said Joshua quietly. "I don't think there should be
any more killing."
"Thank you," gasped a monk.
"At least not until they give us some more information,"
added the sandy-haired vampire.
"All right," Julian commented. Then he sat their captives,
taking no special care even though they were bumped, bruised
and bleeding, back to back on the floor. They looked rather
pathetic, their little feet and legs sticking out flat on
the floor.
"Perhaps I should simply magic you away," he speculated.
"Less mess and fuss."
The monks looked, uhm, worried.
Everyone got a straight back chair from the dining table and
they all sat around the monks. The monks, looking up at
vampires and mages and one shaggy part-time doggy,
considered their position. It wasn't good.
Adele and Gen rejoined everyone. Adele draped herself over
Mitch where he sat in his chair. His ears turned red at
something she whispered to him.
Mabel stood in the background. She'd put by her firearm at a
look from Julian but she didn't look much less threatening,
her arms crossed on her generous chest, her face in a scowl.
Spencer had seated himself at the dining table and was
prepared to take notes.
Gen sauntered over to stand by Julian, who looked up at her
with a smile. "Would you like a chair? We're playing at the
Star Chamber but thought we'd prefer being seated comfortably than
standing menacingly over these poor fellows."
"Yes, fellows," Adele commented. "I suppose you really are
just a brotherhood? No ladies allowed?' She was looking at
the youngest of the monks. His makeup was running and he
looked terrified and very very young.
"NO!" responded the eldest one.
"Ah, too bad. Add sexist pigs to the list of their sins,
Spencer," Julian commented with a fleeting grin. Then he
leant forward, and said in a very calm but entirely icy
voice, "Tell us about yourselves. I'm not into torture, so
I'm not threatening you with it, but I really don't have a
problem with killing you as you sit there. And quite
frankly, I don't care whether you tell us any more about
yourselves or not. Your choice."
"If you are going to kill us anyway, why should we tell you
anymore?" demanded the oldest monk.
"Fine, then," Julian raised a hand.
"The Worm Ourobourous shall revenge us," said the younger
monk proudly through swollen lips.
"That's quite a feat for a mythological dragon," Gideon
observed.
"One that's biting its own tail, at that," added Joshua.
"Dragon!" snorted the young monk. "He is the greatest mage
in all the world!"
"Of course he is!" Julian enthused. Then he looked round at
Spencer. "Uhm, Spence, old chappie, where is Gabrielle?"
"Oh, she got paged by her boss. She was busy explaining to
him how the car got damaged. She said she was to meet him
there to see the damage and brief him. Obviously she planned
to, uhm, edit what she told him."
"I dare say. See, I told her to come work for me. No paperwork
at all. Still, she's been gone for quite a long time, hasn't
she?" Julian looked round and a sea of worried faces met his look.
The monks however suddenly looked smug.
Julian got up and walked closer to the elder monk. He bent
down and met the fellow's eyes. "If you people harm one hair
on that young woman's head, I won't be responsible for the
consequences."
The way he said it was far more effective than if he'd
shouted it, or said it in a threatening manner. The cold,
bloodless words made the monk shiver.
About that time a phone rang. Spencer pulled out his cell
phone and listened to it. His face turned pale. "Sir, it's
for you. He says he has Gabrielle."
Julian walked over and put the phone to his ear. He listened
for a time, then said, "Ah, I might have known it was you.
Obviously. Yes, of course."
He shut down the phone and handed it back to Spencer. He
turned to find every pair of eyes on him.
"Armando. Former lover of mine, alas. I'm afraid I made a
mistake there."
Hardly anyone ever having heard Julian admit to a mistake,
Josh just had to ask, "What mistake was that?"
"Didn't kill him when I had the chance to. Was afraid I was
doing it out of ... Well, at any rate he's alive. And he is
a very good mage."
"As good as you or Raymond?" Gideon asked.
Julian pursed his lips and looked off into the infinite.
"Perhaps. Perhaps he is. But," he added with his more usual
sense of aplomb, "as you see he has a reprehensible taste
for sensationalism, not to mention wretched excess. I dare
say we can turn that to our advantage."
"He has a young lady captive?" Jean asked. "Then why do we
waste time in talk? Let us go and rescue her at once!" He
looked ready to leap off his chair and onto the nearest
convenient white charger.
"My knight," Genevieve murmured, but only Julian heard her.
"Jean," Gideon said in the weary tones of the one who always
has to be the voice of reason, "as much as we all regret
that the young lady has been taken hostage, we need some
more information before we can do anything about it." He
nodded at Julian. "This... Armando. What else can you tell
us about him?"
"He is not Armando," said the younger monk. "He is the Worm
Ourobouros."
"The worm part, I will grant you," Julian drawled.
"I first ran into him in London in the 30s I'd been on the
continent for some time and had only just returned to
England," Julian explained to his friends. "He had the
underworld there all atwitter. Seems he'd managed to pull
off several rather spectacular heists. Being an aficionado
of such things, I decided I really wanted to meet this
mastermind. Turned out the heists were done more by brute
power than by cunning plan. Now I have no particular grudge
against brute power but find its usefulness for most things
far over-rated. At any rate, he intrigued me. We, ahem,
hooked up as it were."
"In the 30s you say? So he is ..." Gideon's question died
away.
Julian lifted an eyebrow. "Well, not immortal, certainly.
Nor is he immune to bodily harm. When last seen my sword was
up to the hilt in his chest. Let's say he's long-lived.
For awhile yet, at any rate."
"He'll be trying to play me. I'm sure he knows I'd go postal
if he harmed the girl, which, alas, is what he might try to
cause me to do. But he won't be in a hurry to harm her.
He'll want to bargain with me for a bit, torment me with
what he'll threaten to do to her, order me to release his
vassals here. He's already demanded I meet him, alone."
"Lies! All lies!" the older monk spat. The younger one eyed
Julian speculatively. "Of course we won't let you meet him
alone," said Gideon.
"He wants to meet me in daylight tomorrow," Julian replied,
sounding almost apologetic. "I think he realizes I have
several vampires on my side."
"Then I'll go with you," Mitch growled. "I owe this
Euroburro a few good bruises."
"What should we do with Davy Jones and Mickey Dolenz here,
though? Josh asked.
"How do you know their names?" Gideon asked while Mitch
choked and Adele helpfully pounded him on the back.
Genevieve was studying the two monks. "How many of you are
there?" she asked again. (Those who were paying attention
will recall that that was her first question upon entering
the hotel.)
"We are legion," said the older one.
"How poetic. I would like a number. Remember, it is already
two less than it was."
"Sixty-nine," said the younger monk.
Several people snorted; it was impossible to detect which
ones.
"We could go and scout out this worm's set-up tonight," Josh
suggested. "The lot of us should be able to overcome sixty-odd monks."
"Yes, well, I agree. We should scout out the place tonight.
If the good monks here would be so good as to tell us where
the worm is."
"Never!" shouted the elder monk. "You may torture me, pull
my fingernails out, do what you will, I will not betray my
Master!"
"Not to mention he'd kill us if we did," the younger, more
sensible monk replied.
"Yes, well, you seem to be in a rather uncomfortable
position, dear fellow. What was your name?" Julian asked politely.
"What are you doing!" the elder monk screamed. "You betray
Him!"
The younger monk looked up at Julian. "My name is Fred."
"Well, Fred," Julian purred. "Perhaps you and I might have a
private little chat."
"If you betray the Master, I will kill you!" spluttered the
older monk.
"You," said Julian, "are beginning to annoy me. Could
someone keep him quiet?"
Jean, who seemed anxious for battle of some sort, got up and
strolled over to the two monks. Fred sidled away from him,
but the older one just sat there proudly.
"I would rather die than betray..." he began, but didn't get
any further with the world's stupidest statement because one
good punch from Jean put his lights out for him.
"Thank you," said Julian. "Come along, Fred." He lifted the
junior monk up to his feet. "If Mickey moves again," he said
to the company at large, "kill him."
The crew watched curiously as Julian led Fred off into one
of the bedrooms. Voices were heard. Then silence for a time.
The clock ticked. Noises were heard from that direction. More time
passed. A gasp. A curse. A groan. No make that several
groans. Then silence.
Gideon and Josh looked at one another. "No, he didn't," Josh
said.
A few minutes later Julian emerged from the bedroom alone.
He was looking rather like a cat who'd just eaten the
canary. Or perhaps the other way round. A very apt analogy,
either way, under the circumstances.
"Did you hurt him?" Adele asked worriedly. She'd rather
thought Fred was cute.
"Hurt him? My dear girl! I left him quite contented."
Gen muttered only for Adele's ears, "Boys.. All alike."
"I'll call for a car," Julian said picking up the house
phone.
While Julian was on the phone Josh tiptoed to the bedroom
door. Fred was lying on the bed, a sweet smile of satiation
on his face. "He's hopeless," Josh was heard to mutter to no
one in particular. He had noted that despite having
apparently won over Fred's allegiance, Julian still had tied
him firmly to the bed frame. Fred didn't appear to mind.
Julian rejoined everyone then. "Okay, let's consider
strategy. Firstly, no heroics." Julian was looking straight
at Jean. "We are only going there to scout out the lay of the
land. Yes, I know there's only sixty odd of them, but our
first priority is to get Gabrielle back. Then, Jean, you can
let free your inner-knight. Understood?" he added looking
round at each of them, apparently hoping for unanimity of
purpose. Silly boy.
Jean opened his mouth to argue. Genevieve, sensing trouble,
not wanting an argument here and now, put a hand on his arm
and said something to him.
"Understood," Jean sighed.
"I don't suppose I could ask you to stay here," Julian added
looking at Adele.
"I should say not. You know what I can do."
Julian frowned. "Yes. I wonder. If you touched the car,
could you find her?"
Adele frowned. "Perhaps."
"All right. How about we split forces then. I'll lead on to
their vile viper's nest, and Adele, you Mitch and say Jean,
go see what you can tell from the car."
"I'll go," piped up Spencer.
Julian looked astonished by this sudden show of bravery from
his young assistant.
"The car's been towed to the police lot. I can distract them
and show the contract and claim you left some personal items
you want me to retrieve. Besides, my car is in the garage here."
"Good idea, Spence. With luck, Mitch will fit into it.
There's hope for you yet, my boy. Mabel, don't you dare hurt
Fred. I have plans for him later.With regard to Mickey here, however,
you're on your own."
Mabel looked pleased to be freed from restraint. Josh
winced.
Gideon raised an eyebrow. He decided he'd rather not know;
not about what Mabel would do the unconcious monk, nor about
Julian and Fred. Josh was half-grinning; but Gideon
preferred a bit more privacy in his own affairs of the
heart. There had been ladies present! He generously included
Mabel in this description.
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