10 [32] All these people are descendents of Noah, nation by nation, according to their different lines of descent. After the flood all the nations of earth were descended from Noah.

11 And as the earth was now in harmony again, sin removed from man, [2] God enjoyed more the company of his children until he realised how proud they had grown. [3] The Angels were growing equally tiring. And God did often cry out loudly, "Oy, enough with the flapping already." [4] God started to plan another great catastrophe, but then decided that the whole disaster thing was a bit dated. Instead he created new children, not human, yet not angel either. [5] These new children he gave a special name, Hanson, from a Hebrew word meaning ‘pretty boy’. [6] And the Lord was proud at his creations, and did bestow upon them a special status. And for a quiddle* the three did sing harmoniously in the heavens, soothing God with sweet songs. [7] And it came to pass that God met with a man, arranging to sell the movie rights for the flood, when a sickly sound pierced the skies. [8] And it came to pass that monotonous MMM-bopping filled the heavens for an unbearable half quiddle. [9] And then it came to pass that the children of earth did cry up into the heavens for the singing to stop.

[10] A man named John bellowed into the clouds above "Please, oh just Lord, cease that terrible sound which fills ours skies. It scares the children, makes the milk of our goats turn sour and my cows seem to have lost that loving feeling." [11] God did contemplate the problem with Hanson for many days. His new children had turned away from him and towards the dark side, ruled by the demon Satan. Hanson singing was nauseating. [12] The people of Earth could take no more. They rose against God, he had failed to stop the sound. [13] "My children," the lord cried. "Why have

turned against me? Have I not given you everything that you could have wanted?" [14] The people cried out in pain. The sound was endless. "Oh Lord please end it now," they cried, beating themselves over the head with palmleaves.

[15] And it came to pass that God did pass judgement on Hanson. He would send them to earth, where the people themselves could have sweet vengeance. [16] And on earth the three reigned for three quiddles, God’s children were unable to defeat them. And it came to pass that the terror sent many mad, and the three became the toys of the devil. And Earth, the lair of the Devil.

[17] God was at this time resting, much stress had the present situation brought him. The wails of man never stopped. "An end must come to this," God declared to his angels. [18] And then, surprisingly enough, it came to pass that God offered salvation to his children. Before final judgement was given, God asked man where these lowly creatures should be sent for their sinfulness.

[19] From the crowd a man did step forward, declaring in a loud voice, "Send them forth to the set of a never-ending episode of Sabrina the Teenage Witch. May they eat not but vegemite and drink not but Dr Pepper." The evil three shrieked. [20] And it came to pass that God gave the final judgement, sending the three further still from their original home in Heaven, to Hell. There they served for an eternity, for their evil deeds – Sodomy, Bestiality and bad singing. [21] The demons had been banished, and Earth was for the first time in four quiddles, in pure harmony. [22] And it came to pass that there was much singing, dancing, praising of the Lord and sodomising of Possums, which God, for this time of joy, decided not to frown upon.