| Tiny's Quote of The Week |
| Ok new quote time. I got this from the Uk Gold showing of the whole first series of Red Dwarf last night (Saturday). For those who don't know Red Dwarf is a Brittish sitcom set 3 million years into space. Three 'lifeforms' are onboard the ship after a neuclear explosion - Dave Lister, the last human alive. He survived because he was frozen in time in a stasus booth due to him sneaking an unquarintined cat on board and refusing to tell the captain where he'd hidden it and therefor being in the stasus booth had saved his life. Another thing on board was Lister's roomate Arnold Rimmer now a hologram after having been killed in the explosion and the Cat, a being that had evolved from Lister's cat. The cats had evolved over the three million years into beings like humans but with the attributes of cats. Everything was watched over by Holly, the ships computer who after three million years alone has gone a bit computer senile despite having an IQ of 6000. This quote has been taken from a conversation between Lister and Holly: Holly - Busy Dave? Lister - Yeah I am actually Lister has been trying to blow the worlds biggest bubble gum bubble Holly - Oh. then you won't want to know about the two super-lightspeed fighters that are tracking us. Lister - What?! Holly - I'll leave you to your bubble blowing, mate Lister - No, Holly. Hol. Come on Holly - Their from earth Lister - Thats three million years away Holly - Their from the NorWEB Federation Lister - Whats that? Holly - NorthWestern Elecrticity Board. They want you, Dave Lister - Me? Why? What for? Holly - For your crimes against humanity Lister - You what?! Holly - Seems when you left Earth, three million years ago, you left half eaten German sausages on a plate in your kitchen Lister - Did I? Holly - You know what happens to sausages left unattended for three million years? Lister - Yeah, they go mouldy Holly - Your sausages, Dave, now cover seven-eighths of the Earth's surface. Also you left seventeen pounds, fifty pence in your bar account. Thanks to compound interest you now own 98% of all the worlds wealth. And now because you hoarded it for three million years nobody's got any money except for you and NorWEB. Lister - Why NorWEB? Holly - You left a light on in the bathroom. I've got a final demand for one hundred and eighty billion pounds. Lister - A hudred and eighty billion pounds?! You're kidding! Holly - (wearing Groucho Marx glasses-nose-and-moustache)April Fool Lister - But it's not April Holly - Yeah, I know. But I can't be waiting six months with a red hot jape like that underneath me hat. Lister - So you just made it up then? Holly - Yeah. Bit of excitment for a while, wasn't it? Can't beat a good wheeze. Haha |
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| Left - Right Rimmer, Kryton (mechanoid appear in series 2), Lister and The Cat. The ship in the background is Starbug an explorer ship used to land on planets |
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