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The  element, tentatively named Administratium, has no protons or electrons  and thus has an atomic number of 0.  However, it does have 1 neutron, 75 executive vice neutrons, 125 vice neutrons, and 111 assistant vice neutrons. This gives it an atomic mass of 312.  The 312 particles are held together by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called morons. 

Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert.  However, it can be detected chemically since it impedes every process with which it has contact. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratium caused one process to take four days to complete when it would have normally occurred in less than one second.

Administratium has a normal half-life of approximately three years, during which time it does not actually decay but, instead, undergoes a reorganization in which executive vice neutrons, vice neutrons, and assistant vice neutrons randomly change position.  Some studies have suggested that atomic mass actually increases after each reorganization.

Research indicates that Administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere.  It tends to concentrate at certain points such as government agencies, large corporations, and universities, and can usually be found in the newest, best appointed and best maintained buildings.

Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic at any level and can easily destroy any productive reaction where it is allowed to accumulate.   Attempts are being made to determine how Administratium  can be isolated or controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but results are not promising.