Netiquette

What can kids do on the internet?

With more than 60 million users, the Internet is filled with opportunities for children and adults to learn, have fun, and meet new friends. But like any large community, the online world does present some risks-especially for children. Knowing how to keep our children safe in cyberspace means becoming acquainted with what they may encounter. We feel comfortable making safety rules about the street, mall, or schoolyard because we've faced those situations ourselves. The Internet is less familiar to most parents. In fact, in many families, kids seem to know more about it than adults do. Don't panic. The key to keeping your child safe online is remembering the tried-and-true rules you taught your child about the neighborhood playground and adapting them to the newest playground-the Internet. Like your community playground, the Internet has several places where kids can play. Each has its own rules and may be more appropriate for some ages than others.

Here's a Quick Guide to Things Your Child Might Do Online:
Send email: Sending electronic messages is, perhaps, one of the safest and most rewarding things a young child can do online. If your child can't type, let him dictate messages to you which you can send to people you know. E-mail becomes riskier as children begin making friends in cyberspace. Be sure your child understands that E-mail is like a postcard-anyone can read it, so it shouldn't include private information.

Chat In chat rooms, children can carry on "real-time" conversations with people they've met online. Children should be allowed to chat only in rooms that are designed for kids and monitored by adults. Because these sites try to screen out adults, your child may be asked to provide personal information in order to join. Be sure your child clears any chat room connections with you before jumping into conversation.

Visit Web Sites The Web includes thousands of "sites" that may be run by universities, government agencies, corporations, schools, special interest groups, or individuals. Some sites are wonderful sources of information and entertainment for children; some aren't. Each Web site has an address, called a URL. Young children should visit only specific Web sites that have been previewed by parents or recommended by a reputable source. Surf Most Web sites are connected to other Web sites with links, icons, or phrases that are highlighted on the computer screen. Surfing means clicking on links to travel from one Web site to another. This serendipitous journey can be great fun, but it can also lead children into places you might not want them to visit. As soon as your child begins surfing independently, discuss which kinds of sites are appropriate as well as those that are off limits. You may also want to install software that will keep them from inadvertently wandering into adult locations.

Play Games Many Web sites offer games that may appeal to children as young as age three. Like video games, online games can be violent and mesmerizing. Be sure your child understands which games you think are okay. If you have doubts, watch the game or play it with your child. Agree together on how much time your child is allowed to spend on games. The things parents do to keep children safe on the neighborhood playground change as they grow older. You won't let your two year old climb to the top of the big slide, but your 8-year-old may get permission to ride his bike to the playground-if he goes with a friend. The same is true of the Internet. Prereaders will almost certainly go online in your company because the Web depends so much on text. As children become able to read and write on their own, you'll probably give them more independence. You'll also want to establish basic rules not unlike those you'd have for the playground.

Here Are Some Suggestions: "Be Wary of Strangers" Unless your child is sending E-mail to grandma, everyone online is a stranger. They may not feel like strangers because kids "meet" them in the comfort of their home where they feel safe. You need to remind your child that friends made in cyberspace really are strangers because it's possible for people to masquerade as someone else online. A friendly "12-year-old" may actually be a 45-year-old man. Spotting a suspicious adult on the playground may be easy for kids; spotting the same adult in cyberspace is much more difficult. Teach your child to be a little skeptical about what other people say online and to come to you with anything that makes them upset or uncomfortable. "Come Straight Home After School" Kids can get into trouble if they wander the neighborhood unsupervised. Wandering aimlessly online isn't any different. Most online time should be spent doing something productive, such as homework. If your child is surfing for its own sake, set a time limit. Ultimately, children need to "come home" to face-to-face friends, family activities, and schoolwork.

"Don't Share Private Information" Even adults must be careful about divulging personal information online. Children need specific guidelines, because they don't understand why information is important or how unscrupulous people can use it to do bad things. Also, many Web sites for youngsters encourage kids to give out personal information in order, for example, to get the password needed to enter a contest or play a game. Before letting your child venture online alone, make sure she understands what you consider "personal" information. Explain that anything she posts on a bulletin board or sends through E-mail can be seen by many other people. Teach her that certain information should never be given out without your permission. Some requests for identifying information actually provide extra security for your child, but you should be the one who checks out chat rooms or Web sites to be sure personal information will be used responsibly. If you have any doubts about your child's ability to remember or obey these rules, consider outgoing filtering software.

"We Need to Meet Your Friends" As your child makes friends online, get to know them just as you would his friends in everyday life. Discuss where your youngster goes online and to whom he talks. Be sure your child knows never to agree to meet someone he's met online.
"Let's Go Online Together" Of course, your child can play on the neighborhood playground alone, but you'll both have more fun if you play too. The same is true in cyberspace. Keep the computer in a family room-not in your kid's bedroom. Take a look at the monitor every once in a while. Encourage your youngster to tell you about the cool things she finds in cyberspace. When you can, sit at your child's side when she's online. It will help you set rules that make sense for your own household. And it will give you an unexpected benefit: You'll get a personal computing lesson from the most affordable computer expert you know!

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Guidelines for parents