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Issue Nine- 03/06/05 |
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I'm a Crustie! Yay! |
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Hi I'm John and I'm a Crustie. And let me tell you that it's just super being an
anti-establishment type. It sure is. I'm so different to the rest of you lowly plebs out
there who muddle through your days being consumers. I'm an individual and as an
individual I have my own original thoughts and ideas that are in no way inspired by
the other crustie types I hang around with. No way. I mean I was into all this stuff long
before I moved to Galway. I know that it was only then that I started growing
dreadlocks and wearing knitted hoodies but let me assure you that before I came here
the wearing of ethnic clobber and the tying of knots in my hair were deeply embedded
ideals that I felt deep in my soul.
So here's some of the ideals and beliefs that I idealise and believe in and some of the not so good things that wreck my buzz: Juggling. For a start let's take a look at juggling. It's an artform. One that only the enlightened such as myself can truly appreciate and understand. Okay, yes, it has been shown that the majority of semi-intelligent monkeys can be taught to juggle in less than two weeks but that really doesn't negate the fact that only I (and others in-the-know) are able to appreciate the cosmic importance of throwing some small coloured balls in the air and then catching them again, repeatedly. Buddhism. It's like this great philosophy or religion or whatever that we all are so totally into. Karma really is what guides us through this journey that we call life. And it's not all about collecting possessions, or even having decent hygiene standards. No. Through the study of Buddhism I've discovered that we are all one consciousness and we're all connected on the astral plains. I'm a totally committed Buddhist now, and just because my parents still make me go to mass at weekends when I go home doesn't mean that Buddhism isn't my real religion. I have, like, two books about it that I bought second hand and I'm definitely going to read them soon. The Man. The System. It's what represses us. It's what stops me and my crustie friends from expressing our individual rights to wear ethnic clobber and not contribute to society at all. I think we need to fight the Man and bring the system down. There should be no currency - everything should be free. And towards this end I have started shoplifting from small, local shops. They're just as much a part of the evil globalisation machine as McDonald's or Coke or any of them. Plus they're less likely to catch you robbing and when your Dad has to drive down to Mill St. in his 05 Beemer to take you home he's not normally very happy, let me tell you. George Bush. This man and the American hate machine that he represents are really the cause of most of the world's ills. I can't believe the American people voted in such a crazy, genocidal maniac. Do they not care at all? Irish politicians of course are all the same, there's no real discernible difference between them so I've never bothered voting. It's not like who's in power in Ireland affects me on a day-to-day basis or anything. Now, let's get back to talking about Bush and how evil he is..... |
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