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					redemption by sword'n'quill http://www.ausxip.com/fanfiction/r/redemption.html SYNOPSIS: The next story in the stable for Justice House, this novel deals with the experiences of Angel, an inmate in a women's prison, convicted of murder when it was really self defence. The story tells of her remarkable experiences on the inside, and her love for another prisoner which helped her to survive the harrowing ordeal of her incarceration. NANCY: As much as I like this story and think everyone in their right minds should read it, I can't help wishing that bards would get out of this "I have to write a 200 page novel" mentality. I'd like to see more short fiction coming along that is exciting and challenging like this stuff is, rather than simply sex for 15 pages. EWOK: There are some lovely moments of intensity in here: excerpt: And believe me when I tell you, the color of rage is red. The voice of Angel, the narrator, is very clear. Thus far, though I'm not so far into the story, I'm impressed. NANCY: Then there are the clever little stop offs for some political preaching... *g* excerpt: Now, given that I've already lived off of the generosity of your tax dollars for five long years now, which would you rather have? Me, an able bodied, intelligent young female spending the rest of her life on state aid, or me, an able bodied, intelligent young female contributing to your local economy? Thought as much. EWOK: How about able bodied, intelligent young female contributing to your local baseball team? NANCY: They're going to have to read the story to understand that one, Ewok. EWOK: OK, reasons why this is nothing less than direct uber: the blonde with the instinct for staff fighting, the Amazon called Pony, and her curly-haired friend, and doubtless many other similarities I'm yet to encounter... NANCY: Well, leaving the whole Justice House issue aside...(After all, Ewok, we don't want to sound like we're harping on an old issue here! *g*) Parts of this story are downright chilling! I loved the part where she's giving the backstory and the first warden kills herself. *shudder*. However, amongst all the really great stuff, it does have some down moments: excerpt: An eternity passed in that brief second. Her soul called out and mine answered as visions spun out between us of past lives led and sacrifices made. All in the name of a perfect love that was never born and would never die. EWOK: Oh crap. Not the "moment of recognition". Where's that "top ten cliches of uber fic" list when you need it? Start checking 'em off... NANCY: I'm having trouble with the recognising the love that was never born. *confused look* Then again when you read further into it, you start to realise that what initially seemed like a bunch of cliches, is a tendency to stay fairly close to the Xena backstory. I don't know whether this was deliberate or not, but it works for me. Originality while still being Xena related. The occasional clanger line doesn't ruin the mood entirely for me. Having a novel that uses first person in this kind of chatty way is a good achievement. It's really hard to keep the characterisation solid for that length of story. You really need to *know* your character inside and out. EWOK: *roaming ahead* UBER-Callisto?!? Who brought her in? NANCY: *swoon* Yeah, the blonde haired psycho? She's really cool... Overall, I think a lot of people are going to be really blown away by the strength and emotion of this piece. NANCY: I'm giving this one an 8. It loses points for some of the bad lines, but the voice she has created here deserves some recognition. This writer has talent! EWOK: It's definitely the voice that has it. 8.5.