The Road You leave Behind
"You mean left you again don't you?" Robert's eyes peered at his younger brother. "Don't get smart Nate. Can I just stay here for a day or two? Least till I can get back on my feet?" Nate stared hard at his older brother. He seemed much the worse for wear; his cloths worn and tattered as if he had stopped a few places and had left whoever was stupid enough to get in his way in a much more unpleasant condition. And Robert's irritation showed. "What in the world are you looking at Nate? Just give me a yes or no, that will do just fine. I will sleep in the friggin' woods if I have to but I would prefer a bed for tonight." Not overly startled with his brother's aggressive tone Nate simply nodded. "Sure Robert, You know this is your home too..."
Rising off of the worn living room chair Robert replied while tucking in his shirt again. "That's kind of you Nate but I will find my feet, I always do." Eyeing the man from his own soft chair Nate drummed his fingers on the armrest. "Sure you will Robert. I know that. " Robert simply nodded and began to turn towards his old room. Nate looked into the distance and called over his shoulder, "How bad was it Robert?" Robert didn't turn, the darkness of the hallway clouding his form, his voice not even above a whisper. As the sound flowed to Nate's ears he was sure the words were not meant for him to hear. "I mentioned momma..." Nate's eyes grew as round as saucers, but he wisely dismissed the words along with Robert. "Get some sleep Robert." The only answer was the shuffling of feet and the closing of a wooden door.
Nate rose quickly and looked at the door through the darkness. It was not widely known but he and Robert shared mothers and mothers only. Robert's mother had run off to live with Nate's rich father leaving Robert with a bitter abusive father only at the age of 5. The two had never known until much later in their lives of this bizarre turn of events. It had taken a war to bring the two face to face with one another, and the results had been almost disastrous, the two nearly killing each other in hand to hand combat.
Nate rose quickly; he hated thinking about those days. They were deep in the past. As Robert had often told him when they found each other again in Rhydin, those were "Memories of a time best forgotten." Leaning on the windowsill he gazed out into the night sky. He would be forced to face that time again in his life one way or another; Kyt was too curious to let it go. But as his green eyes reflected in the low lamplight and watched the willow trees in the distance a strange thought reached into Nate's head. Perhaps it was time to accept those times again. Embrace who and what he was. Maybe now he had the strength to dig into his past and face the man who he was so long ago.
Nate Richmond had fallen through the rift thinking he had died. One moment he had been locked in a death grip with his half brother Robert on the battlefields in Alabama. The next thing he knew he was lying somewhere else, a new location with an odd variety of people staring at him. He looked into the eyes of the various creatures that inhabited RhyDin and had fled past them all. Never in his life had he seen such things and only in the wildest drunken tales could he have imagined things like were-beasts, and vampires. Nate had kept to himself and the countryside at that point, fleeing the life of the city and those who inhabited it. There he had pondered his existence and what had happened to him.
It was then, what must have been, oh probably fifteen years now, that he had built his home in Wispy Willow. For the first few years he lived solely off what he could provide for himself but soon the need for building materials and natural curiosity had caused him to wander around various areas. It was a dangerous time for him, learning the ins and outs of life in RhyDin. What made it worse was that he could never figure out if he was indeed living or dead. As he picked up more books and talked with others, Nate began to learn about alternate realities. While he had the benefit of a Northern education he was by means no way equipped to handle these confusing concepts. Still, he found enough answers to learn RhyDin was a world similar to, yet very different from his own. What was perhaps more alarming was searching through historical texts and discovering that *his* name was part of RhyDin history somehow. Sure enough, among the yellowed pages was the name of General Nathaniel William Richmond.
Nate lived alone. He was not used to a single man's life and was even more at a loss without the servants that he had benefited from his early childhood days. Simple acts he had taken for granted, such as cooking, became new experiences for him. After burning down the kitchen a few times however, Nate slowly learned to become self-reliant. In doing for himself and learning the way of this new land and simple life, Nate began to find a new happiness that he had never before experienced in his youth or in his military career. His childhood was one of a father who had provided for him, but who held unusually high expectations; and a mother who used his father ruthlessly. Eventually, the man's health failed, leaving her the sole heir of a solid fortune. His military life, while successful, had been shady at best. Sometimes military politics and gains could be evil things; sometimes, a man was forced to do things he would normally never think of doing to advance and survive. Shaking his head, Nate moved into his small kitchen.
He stretched there for a moment, finding a glass and pouring a bit of water into the small clay cup that was his favorite. It was horridly misshapen, almost as if a child had made it, and the parent too fond of the love put into the object used it more out of affection then function. "That's what I was..." Nate whispered softly to himself. "I was a child when I came to RhyDin, straight from the womb." Indeed, it was this idea of rebirth and the desire to be shed of his past that Nate had found himself wanting more and more to forget his older days. One day in a general store he was offered the opportunity to do just that. While paying his bill, the man behind the counter had said "Good day Mr..." The long pause was meant for Nate to give his name in a friendly manner. Nate almost responded with "Richmond" which was normal for him to do. This time, however, he paused. "Regan...Daniel Regan." The name was taken from a young Irish solider Nate had cradled in his arms after leading his first brigade, the proud Thirty Second, into an unsuccessful raid on a southern bunker. The man behind the counter simply smiled and bid him good day, and thus Nathaniel William Richmond became Daniel Regan. The past could be forgotten and a new era in his life began.
It remained that way for several years. Even when Nate discovered the Duel of Fists, a sport in which he delighted, he kept his true past hidden from everyone he met. It was not hard. RhyDin was Nate's reality now, the war forgotten along with the rest of his old life. What pleased Nate even more was that no one really seemed to care about his past. When he signed his named to be entered into the standings he had merely written DRegan32, using his new First Initial, Last Name, and brigade number. When the Standings went up and people saw the name, they shortened it to DR. If that was what they wanted to call him it was fine. He really he didn't care. If they had no curiosity about his past he would not give them cause to wonder about it.
Nate slipped slowly at the clear blue water in his cup, lowering his head and running his hand through the short brown hair that crowned his head. He let out a sigh and his eyes swept the room; he suddenly felt old again. He crossed one leg over the other as he leaned back on the kitchen counter top. He thought of the time when he was about to be married; even then he had not revealed who he was or what his past had been. He had always heard that honesty was the key to any relationship; if there were any untruths the foundation of the relationship would crumble. Perhaps that was why his first attempt at love in RhyDin had failed. He hadn't explained who he was and what he was about. Perhaps that was why he told Kyttn; she deserved to know and he wanted his relationship with her to last. He just hoped she could understand as more of the past started creeping up on him.
He turned around to face the counter, a small ivy plant that he kept in a little pot rested there. Dumping the rest of the water on the plant so as not to waste any, Nate made a decision. It was time to admit who he was, not only to himself and Kyt, but perhaps the world. It was time to acknowledge that the Daniel Regan no longer existed; indeed, he had existed in falsehood only for many years. He would hide from his past no longer. He was Nate Richmond now, come what may.
He only hoped he had the strength to deal with it all. He hoped others had the understanding to accept him as well...
Important: If you've enjoyed this, please read this--Copyright: 1997