The Adventures of Paisley Blue Last night I worked late and felt like I had a really productive day at work. It felt very good. I can't say enough how much I love my job. Sure, I don't get paid as much as those in the for-profit sector, but in addition to having a job I actually enjoy, I get the added satisfaction of knowing that I am doing something to improve my community and the world. After all, I did turn down a job that paid $5/hour more just so I could work at this nonprofit. I've already been a legal secretary and a paralegal and a medical secretary and a transcriptionist. I love working in Brand Management and Advertising. I love all the webmaster work I get to do on both the intranet and the internet. I love all the varied duties I have. Best of all, I love all the people on my team. We are a real team. Now that I have experienced that, I don't ever want to be without it. So now you see why I tell everyone that work is my sanctuary. This is where I go to remember that there is a real, normal, sane world. Here I am valued for my skills and abilities, my creativity and initiative, my problem-solving and unusual way of looking at things. They call it thinking outside the box. To me, it's just the way I think. LOL When I finally got home last night, Michael was in front of the makeup mirror putting on face. In other words, he was making the transition from boy to girl. Within moments he was at my throat. In a quiet moment I asked Mechanic whether he'd been like that all day or if it was just because I was home. I got the distinct impression that it was just because I was home. So we went to the bar where his/her show was, and Mechanic and I sat bored, drinking water and severely rationing our last cigarettes. Not a single other drag queen showed up for the show, so Michael had to carry it alone. Let's put it this way - what used to be a one and a half to two hour show lasted 35 minutes. We sat and visited with some folks for awhile, then we went to another bar. This other bar has three floors. On the top floor last night was karaoke, and you know how much I love to sing. It was a crush - wall to wall people. I put in one song and was told it would be a one-hour wait. That's fine. I waited. Michael put in one song, too, and was right ahead of me. I knew I'd probably be singing after him. He sang "Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me," had a really rocky start but pulled it off at the end. Then they called my name. I wasn't really sure I heard my name but I kept walking forward anyway. As I neared the front, Michael and others pointed to me and said, "There she is!" I climbed up on the stage and the karaoke host said hi, and confirmed the name of my song. The music started up for "Proud Mary" by Tina Turner. Some in the audience started getting excited. That got me excited. It starts with a speaking part, then goes into a slow, easy singing part. I had them hooked. People were clapping and jamming and urging me on. The brothers in the house were really excited... I guess they liked my performance. Then the song changes and gets really upbeat and I started dancing in the little break. "Oh, I left a good job in the city..." I really belted it out. People were up and dancing. People were swaying their hands in the air. People were whooping and hollering... I had the audience's full attention. It was magic. When my performance ended, they erupted in hollering and clapping. As I made my way back to my seat, many people reached out and congratulated me, telling me wonderfully nice things. Mechanic and Michael said I glowed. I'm sure I did because I felt it all the way from the inside out. There were other things that happened last night that weren't so pleasant but I feel so good about what I just wrote that I don't want to spoil it. Suffice to say that I am well and unharmed and heartily looking forward to the change in circumstances that is soon going to come into my life. Michael is in for a shock. In a way I'm sorry for that, but it was of his own making. I feel like my star is ascending... I am about to regain control and power in my own life and it's so close I can taste it... I am excited... I am at the beginning of an adventure that is just about to get underway, and I am ready. It's like another chapter of my life is about to unfold. Just like a chapter began when I started working here. Just like a chapter began when CB and I got together. Hmm... maybe he and I had several chapters together. We crammed a lot of living into a short period of time. Okay, now I've done it... I brought up CB again... and now I'm thinking about him, and missing him. Funny how that happens. There are half a dozen men right now who want to take me out. One who continually buys me flowers and candy and stuff and I still haven't gone out with him. Yet when all is said and done, there is just one man who my thoughts continually return to... some people say I'm a glutton for punishment. In my secret heart, I know that I love him more than I will ever love any man ever again. That's what journals are good for... confessing things like that. I know I will love others. It's just that CB will always be the one. Maiden, Mother, and Crone, will he and I ever be together again? Okay, I gotta go... Mechanic is picking me up from work tonight and we're gonna go to the club for lube wrestling again. Mechanic earned $50 just for stepping into the ring last week - the winners don't get any prizes but all participants get cash and two cocktails. If I'm lucky, maybe I'll get to be the one to squirt the lube on him and rub it all over... again. *heavy sigh* *giggle* ~Paisley Blue

Paisley's Journal logo courtesy of Flaming Text.

http://www.oocities.org/paisley_blue/jour/02/022702.html
Contact webmaster @ paisley_blueATyahoo.com