Why Analyze It?
Therapists throughout the world
Have a very strange conviction:
They look askance
At what we used to call "romance",
And they now call it "love addiction".
We live in a time when each erection
Must go through reams of introspection.When you're akin to
Someone's attractions,
Why break it into
Degrees and fractions?
Why analyze it?When you are able
Love's wine to savor,
Reading the label
Won't change the flavor---
Why analyze it?It's not a virus with which to cope,
Why put it under a microscope?
Ice won't chill it,
And heat can't kill it.It's there---you do it---
And pray for beauty,
So why review it
Like dear Judge Judy?
Why analyze it?II
You can't direct it
In your direction;
You can't deflect it
With contraception---
Why analyze it?Though it gets vicious
And cheap and gaucher,
Two sets of dishes
Won't make it kosher---
Why analyze it?You cannot mold it like potter's clay
Or catalogue it like DNA---
Maps don't guide it,
And Ban can't hide it.Once it has cropped up,
You cannot crush it;
And if it's stopped up,
You just can't flush it---
Why analyze it?
Why analyze it now?III
Though you're rejected
And hurt and groggy,
You can't dissect it
As you would a froggy---
Why analyze it?You cannot fix it
Through sheer mechanics;
Nobody kicks it
By taking Xanax---
Why analyze it?You cannot grab it around the throat
Or switch the channel with your remote;
Lloyd's won't insure it
And herbs can't cure it.You can't enhance it
By adding streusel,
You can't advance it
With Metamucil---
Why analyze it?
Why analyze it now?IV
You can't deny it---
Those great sensations---
Or classify it
As you can crustaceans---
Why analyze it?You may dissolve it
With tears and sorrow,
But you can't solve it
Like Hercule Poirot---
Why analyze it?You cannot dry it out in the sun,
You can't report it to 911---
Raid can't raid it
And Tums can't aid it.You cannot dodge it
Unless you're senile;
You can't enlarge it
With implants penile---
So why analyze it?
Why analyze it now?V
Though it gets tragic
And starts to totter,
You can't do magic
Like Harry Potter---
Why analyze it?It's not salami,
It will not slice nice;
You can't call Mommy
To make it nice-nice---
Why analyze it?You can't protect it with HMOs,
You cannot snort it straight up the nose;
Stores don't stock it
Or sunscreens block it.You can't reduce it
Or make it easy,
You cannot goose it
Up the gazeezi---
Why analyze it?
Why analyze it now?