A teeny tiny replacement fan at the library...
06.15.98
Hey look, an update. All you peple (except for me in my old age rereading this of course) are missing the long ass entry I wrote a few nights ago...i really outta find a way to ftp...
A few highlights of my life as of late...saw Mike Watt at Slim's Thursday...tried a new recording setup which worked really nice. Stood in a nonexistant line for three hours sunday morning...which paid off in the form of front row smashing pumpkins ticket june 30th at the Bill Grahamn Ciciv Aud (same place I saw radiohead)---trading/taping friend down south asked me to get the tickets for him...so i got a couple for myself. Sp isn't my favorite band, and i've seen 'em before...but still enjoyable music so why not...and now, front row!? i've never seen a show front row in my entire life...ultra cool :) Been sick with a minor cold as of late=no exerocising for me...been workign a lot as of late also..about 32 hours in three days....thats a lot of chinese food folks...
finishing up forms for the army...told greg, christa read it in the journal, becca knows, sis knows...i still needa talk with sarah macadam to see where she's gonna be the next year...i think she might be done with school or close to it by now...
I finally picked up a pair of sunglasses...real cheapo ones from safeway...I was waiitung in line because a ladt gave me a $100 bill on a delivery and I didn't have change....triup to saefway to pick up some needed stuff--batteries, hairspray (grr) and the shades called to me...wahddever...somethign i have noticed is that many more pairs of shades suit me with short hair as opposed to long hair...yeah OK...can you tell i'm just trying to splat out a bunch of useless drivel in the scant minutes I have to do so?
SO next thursday i go in for my army physical. big fun there. after that i just need to sit down, pick out a position within the forces and indicate my desire for a base on the east coast...sign seom more papers and wala...three year break from school...the two year enlistment is actually 2 years, four months, so i might as well go in for three years...only eith more months, more money...blah blah blah you know it already i think (or was that in the entry you can't read yet? I dunno)
I asked becca thursday night at the watt show if she still wanted to have sex with me. i just wanted to have the issue settled either way. she said "i don't know". how the hell does that settle anything? although i essentially told her i don't want to have sex with her...i would really like to see her side of the story. i don't know...it doesn't matter either way probably I suppose.
The past few days I've been losing that feeling of freedom I've discuyssed herein...maybe it's the lack of exerocise. maybe it's just my neurotic self catching up with reality again. I can't say. today's my day off this week but it doesn't really feel like it. I'm having trouble being realaxed right now. This cough doesn't help any.
One good thing about being sick though...makes it much easier to quit smoking...so yeah i'm giving it another go. day three...
Katrina is starting to take more steps on her own now...another month or so and she won't be crawling at all anymore I think...such a precious thing she is...for all of us, mom dad, justine, ron...the whole family...
So did I indicate my likely date of civilian departure? A week or so after sept 15th (that's when the tori show is in Oakland)...which means 8 weeks of basic training and I have not the slightest clue as to whether or not I'll be able to write anything then...I still need to officially withdraw from the university, and talk to my renter about getting my $100 deposit back. I don't really want to wait any longer on these things...i really wish I hadn't promised my parents I'd wait to settle everything up with the army personal...*sigh* Part of me wants to leave that out there...part of me is still afraid of what is to come. This decision of mine is, in part, a way of squelching my own fears, of becoming my own person, and beginning in earnest, my own life...so it's no surprise there's that small nagging doubt...but my mind is still set. I'm looking foward to three years in the military, I really am. Of course, another part of me is still in denial about the whole thing, doesn't really believe what is coming is actually reality...still sleeping crappy.Saturday night I downed a double dose of nyquil and that gave me a decent night's sleep...notice I say decent, not great...last night I got about three horus of sleep before waking back up and being unable to return to slumber for another hour...yay. grrrr!!!! is a good night's sleep too much to ask? I'm really rather sure it's not pyschological...I feel more sane and happy than I have in months and mponths...I think it's just physical...maybe too much caffeine...maybe my recent quitting isn't helping matters much either...can't say...