Hello, good people. My name is Rev. Dick Jr., and I am the Executive Director of COD Deliverance Ministries.

COD Deliverance Ministries was founded by my uncle, the Rev. Dick, on April 16, 2000, shortly after he first became aware of the existence of COD the Cult of Dan.  Before his encounter with COD, the Rev. Dick had been a humble preacher, running a small soup-kitchen in an upscale neighborhood. It was mainly for urban professionals, who didn't have time to make home-made soup. He tried to make a warm atmosphere for them, because their lives are generally so bleak. He also organized the annual father-and-son trout breakfast, which had made a name for itself as one of the premier social events of the season. So, as you can see, my uncle worked hard and tried to do his bit to help his community.

All that changed when my uncle made the decision to take on COD and expose its satanic agenda.  When it comes to playing hardball with their opponents, CODists make Scientologists look like a bunch of Unitarians. When he first began denouncing COD, the Shrinemaster of The Ruin webzine proclaimed a crusade against him. Within a few days, the pages of The Ruin were full of unbelievable accusations about how he liked to ogle little boys' butts and suckle at the teats of sweet innocent kids (young goats, I mean). Some helpful person printed these reports off and distributed them door-to-door in his community. The next day, it was front-page news in the local paper. The next thing he knew his soup-kitchen was deserted, his wife had left him, a local community group was holding round-the-clock "Run the Scum out of Town" demonstrations on his front lawn, and small children were coming up to him and spitting on his shoes. Subsequently, an enraged mob burned down his house and rode him out of town, naked and strapped to a rail. Actually, it was originally a peaceful group of demonstrators, until some COD operatives infiltrated them and made them more proactive.  At the time, I was doing missionary work in far-off Guatemala, and unaware of this horrific turn of events.  Otherwise, I would of course have intervened to save my uncle from this smear campaign.

For a time, my uncle moved to a small cabin in a remote and mountainous part of the U.S.  After arranging for some electricity, running water and internet access, he courageously decided to resume his ministry.  On May 1, 2000, he opened a new COD Deliverance Ministries building, this CDM website, and a web-based club where suffering souls could seek help and deprogramming.

It now appears that the suffering he endured at the hands of CODists had unhinged my uncle's mind, and he had already begun to lose touch with reality and slip into Dan's sad little world of delusions.  Within a few days of the opening of CDM, "Betsy the talking goat" (Dan wearing a goat costume) appeared on the scene, claiming that "she" was a defector from COD.  Instead of seeing through the disguise, my uncle welcomed her with open arms.  It is my belief that Dan was already beginning to practise some form of hypnotic mind-control on him, or else was slipping him some drugs.  Within a few days, my uncle had developed a very warm and affectionate relationship--a relationship which appears to have departed from the standards of behavior between human beings and farm animals prescribed for us in the Books of Leviticus and Deuteronomy.  Please note that I am in no way exonerating him for his unusual behavior, but you must remember that he was under a great deal of stress at the time, and probably not in his right mind.

Drunk with love, my uncle handed control of his ministry and bank accounts over to "Betsy".  Within a matter of a few hours, his club had been mysteriously deleted, and his bank account drained of all funds.  He was a ruined man.

At this point, Dan launched the second stage of his plan of destruction.  He appeared in the form of "Binky the elf" (this is actually Dan, kneeling on a pair of shoes), and informed my uncle that he was assuming control of the building and what was left of the ministry, and assigning my uncle to a new job cleaning toilets with his bare hands.  "Binky" said that if my uncle did not comply, he would hand him over to the Donkey Mafia, or the Cardboard Gorilla Protection Society's crack squad of Stealth Baboons, who would probably kill him.  My uncle, now completely bonkers and terrified out of his wits, complied and began scrubbing.

His scrubbing continued from then on, apart from a brief intermission when he was allowed out for a couple of hours, to participate in the "Battle of Armageddon".  This was a bizarre drug-induced mass hallucination which Dan staged on June 3, 2000, in which he deluded people into believing that he (Dan) was fighting himself ("Binky") in a Japanese death thumb-wrestling match in a steel cage with thumb tacks and flaming ropes.  My uncle was assigned to be "Binky's" manager, and even given some hope of freedom should he help Binky win the match.  He was knocked cold three times, spent nearly an hour lying unconscious on a concrete floor, was briefly hospitalized, then returned to the care of "Binky".

CODists have often claimed that my uncle is under sentence of eternal damnation for his crimes, that he is in fact COD's first "damned soul", and that he will never be released from his toilet scrubbing servitude.  While I commend the doctrine of eternal damnation as a vindication of divine justice, I cannot accept that a megalomaniacal cross-dresser who drugs people has the right to sentence my uncle to it.  The fact is, my uncle the Rev. Dick is now a very sick man, caught in a horrifying Dan-induced hallucination.  He believes that he now MUST clean toilets to save his life, and he refuses to stop cleaning toilets under any circumstances.

Owing to my uncle's unfortunate insanity, I have now assumed complete control of COD Deliverance Ministries.  I intend to work with my uncle, lovingly and patiently, to try to detach him from his toilet.  But I fear that he will never be well enough to hold any position of responsibility at CDM again.

Dan clearly has a lot to answer for..

If you have learned something from this website, if you have been moved, if you have grown spiritually, PLEASE share what you have learned! Send this URL to all your friends. Everyone--every man, woman and child--must know about the COD menace, so that they can defend themselves against it.

Bless you all good people.

To read the full story of my uncle's attack on COD and how his life was ruined, be sure to read:

   The Dick Diaries

To find out more about how my uncle was tormented in a bizarre drug-induced hallucinatory wrestling match, read:

The Battle of Armageddon
 

Back to Main Page