The Adventures of Screaming-Invisible-Ninja-Man

He steals silently through campus, lurking in womens' washrooms and in the back row of classes, and all the while he's screaming like a blue messiah.

"This class licks my scrotum!" screams Screaming-Invisible-Ninja-Man in the back row of Philosophy 211.6.

"Let's discuss what is actually meant by that idiom," professor Hanson drones.

Suddenly, Screaming-Invisible-Ninja-Man leapt from his seat, and with a bowel-stretching scream he drew his katana and did a triple mid-air summersault which would have looked great if anyone could have seen it, which no one could.

Arriving at the front of the class after his graceful leap, Screaming-Invisible-Ninja-Man screamed out a strange, Cantonese death song and in one fluid motion sliced the professor's head off his body. But so swift and powerful was Screaming-Invisible-Ninja-Man that he kicked the disembodied head out of the door of the classroom with his invisible-ninja-toe before it had even touched the ground.

All of this was a marvelous spectacle and would have received a standing ovation if anyone had seen it. But not only was Screaming-Invisible-Ninja-Man invisible, but the professor's boring monotone had put the entire class to sleep.

Not disheartened in the least, Screaming-Invisible-Ninja-Man left to strike terror into the evil denizens of the ladies' can.