MY LIFE - JANUARY

Tuesday, January 2, 2001

Some people just aren't funny. No matter how hard they try, they just aren't funny. I try hard, but I at least know every now and then something brilliant will come out. Whether anyone heard it is another story. But some people, they just can't quite do funny. Paul's like this at work. As I've said in the past, he's such a nice and smart guy. Sure, his hygiene isn't exactly the best, but he's nice. He just can't be funny.

His voice doesn't allow him to change how he sounds when he's talking without sounding awful. His laugh scares more people than anything else. He tried to be funny at least four or five times last night and it just didn't work. I feel bad talking about this, but I can't imagine why he's the way he is.

I wonder if he realizes what people think about him? I wonder if he realizes that he just needs to change his lifestyle a little and people would like him more. He needs to get a hair cut, trim his facial hair a little bit (he looks like a wild man for god's sake), and get new glasses. Those thick frames just aren't cutting it. He needs some wire rims. He nees a wire rack (sorry, old MST3K joke). He needs new clothes.

He needs a new attitude. He makes me look like the most optimistic, happy person you've ever met in your life. He's so damn pessimistic about everything. Whatever's good has to go bad. He's said that like a million times. You ask him what he did for the holiday and he lists every damn tv show he watched that entire day or tells you in detail how his video game went.

He once played an entire season of baseball on his playstation in a day. I mean, he makes me look like the biggest socializer on the planet. It's sad because he's had offers and opportunities to change himself a little bit, but he doesn't do it. He can't drive because he's not confident behind the wheel. Apparently backing up is a major problem for him.

We've all tried to encourage him to make a change, but he hasn't taken us up on our offers. He's just too set in his ways and it's really sad because he could be so much more. He's another one that makes me realize just how good I have it. Girls at least talk to me all the time in one way or another. I don't think he has that luxury, and if he does, he's not saying anything about it.

The whole negative attitude just bothers me though. He thinks everyone's out to get him. He looks at just how much can go wrong rather than what can go right. And he's even harder on himself than I am on myself. It's just amazing how good he makes me look and even more amazing when you listen to him talk. He knows so much about so many things that it isn't even funny.

I want him to be funny on purpose. I want him to be able to say something that's just flat out funny. He's only done it a couple of times in the past couple months. He's had maybe two really funny lines and he's capable of more. Someone with his knowledge should be able to come up with something. The funniest people are sometimes the smartest people.

He's an enigma though. No one's going to be able to figure him out. I hope he finds a girl who's patient with him and who'll make him get his act together.

---

Today was very busy but I'm starting to get even better. My throat didn't hurt that much at all. This seems to be the losing my voice stage of the sickness. I'm still stuffy so when I can talk, it's pretty damn clear something's up, although I tried to keep telling others I was doing better. They wouldn't listen, but that's just as well. I don't really need them to believe me anyway.

In any case, it was very busy today. People are just getting sick like crazy and everyone's getting medicine right now because of it. I don't think we had a chance to really catch up with things until around 7:30 or so, and even then, it was still a little busy. It did finally die out, but not until we had reached around 680 scripts.

When I left at 10, we were close to 700, so I wouldn't be surprised if we surpassed that number during the night because there's usually a small rush later on. It was getting a lot colder outside, so maybe that made people decide to stay home. Whatever it was, it just fizzled out.

Meanwhile, Paul was continuing to complain about one thing or another. He's not happy with Linda going forward with trying to reach lead tech, something that doesn't thrill me either, but still. He doesn't need to try and degrade what she's trying. I don't think she'll be able to pass any kind of national certification test myself, but if she does, then all the more power to her. She still has to go through all the training modules anyhow, something she doesn't want to do.

I told Paul if he wants it so bad, then he needs to get moving himself and try and get things taken care of like I'm going to do. The only way he can prevent her from getting lead tech is if he gets it, and it's the same deal for me. If I want to keep either of them from it, I have to earn it. I don't want to hear about him complaining about how Linda's doing this and Linda's doing that.

He's not going to get anywhere with that attitude and he should know that.

He's just too easy to work up though. You say the right thing to him and he just gets so crazy about it. It's kind of funny, but it's also kind of scary. I know how to push all sorts of buttons with him and I've only been working with him for two months. It's really sad. It usually takes me longer to figure out what gets someone riled up, but I was finding things right away with him. It really makes me wonder.

It's just so hard to believe that someone could get so worked up over such silly things. Paul's an amazing person. It's just that he's amazing in all the wrong ways. I hope he starts changing soon for his own sake.