MY LIFE - 2003

Social Experiment #319 - Wednesday, October 22, 2003

In the span of three days, I've gone from believing Ally to be a complete liar, an utter fraud, and someone who I couldn't trust if my life depended on it, to wondering if she's going to be alive at the end of this week.

I don't know how much sense this is going to make, so just try to follow as I try to recreate just what the hell happened last weekend.

Friday night, I was talking to Ally online. She said she'd be right back and after about 10 minutes, she was. At least her screen name was. What followed was one of the most surreal conversations I'll probably ever have in my life.

Now keep in mind that the Ally I've always talked to was the most confident girl in the world. She knew she was hot and damn anyone who thought otherwise. Well, all of a sudden, I was talking with a girl that "hated" herself and was embarrassed by herself. A new picture was sent to me and was completely different from what I had been shown before. Now, understand I believed I was talking to Ally and that she was revealing her true self to me.

I didn't know what to do or what to say at the time. I was pretty damn confused by everything that was happening. She then said if I wasn't going to talk that she was going to go to camp (she's a cheerleader). I actually signed off and figured it was over and done with.

A few hours later my phone starts ringing. It's Ally, but I don't want to talk to her. I'm hurt and betrayed at this point in time and want nothing to do with her. She leaves me messages saying that if I want to talk, I can go ahead and call. I don't.

The calls continue into the next day but I still won't answer them. It doesn't matter what time it is, I refuse to talk to this girl because of what she had supposedly done to me.

It ends up being Sunday night when I sign on to AIM for the first time in a couple of days. The reason is I receive a note from Ally on Bolt saying that it wasn't her that said all those things, it was her sister. Ally adds that she was gone all weekend. I figure it's just a lame attempt to get me back, but I sign on anyway and give the girl a chance to try and explain things.

She immediately begins explaining what happened. After she had left for that ten minute stretch, some of her friends came over and she was given permission to go out for the weekend. Her sister said she'd get on and tell me that and Ally proceeded to leave thinking everything was okay. Well, as is obvious, her sister didn't do that. In fact, her sister impersonated her in an attempt to break us apart.

It may sound a little crazy, but when I thought about the things that were said and the timing of everything, it makes perfect sense. Ally was gone the whole time this went on. When she found out, she continuously tried to call me to explain what happened and what her sister had done. Well I hadn't answered because I didn't know all this.

But wait, it gets even better. That night, she complained that her heart was acting weird. I told her it was stress and that she needed to calm down. The next day, while walking at school, she passed out and stopped breathing. In essence, her heart gave out on her. She was rushed to the hospital, had emergency surgery, and there was a chance she could die.

Thankfully, she didn't.

As a result of all the stress that occurred, Ally's on thin ice right now. From what I know, she passed out again today after she had a confrontation with her sister (who's seriously starting to piss me off to no end). The problem with her getting bent out of shape is that it adds stress to her already-weakened heart and brings her that much closer to heart failure.

It would be an understatement to say that I'm a bit concerned by all this. Not only is this girl coming dangerously close to dying, she's doing it because of things involving me and I'm completely helpless to do anything about it.

Obviously, it's hard to focus on work when your girlfriend is in the state that she's in. I was able to sleep last night, but this morning after she called me, I didn't sleep very well. You could say it might have just been because I had been woken up, but I also believe me worrying about her had something to do with it as well.

Nothing can ever come easy, can it?

I really just want her to stop getting all bent out of shape over things that aren't worth it. Yes, I know she feels the need to defend my name when someone says something, but the things she's fighting over are things I'd barely even notice, much less care about. She needs to not let things get to her. Someone calling me a name isn't going to hurt me in the least. I've dealt with much worse in my lifetime.

She doesn't seem to handle jealousy very well though. I'm not talking about being jealous of me, but jealous of what another girl might think about our relationship and what we have with each other. She doesn't handle those things well. Yes, people are going to hate what we have, but the best way to get back at those people is continue to make this thing work, not fight every person who has something stupid to say.

I hope I can get that message through to her soon. I don't mind her defending me and everything, but she's really no good to me dead or in the hospital.

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News and notes...I cannot wait until next week when I have three days off. I feel I've more than earned it with the way things have gone the last few weeks at work. I seriously need the break...Next week is Steve's last week at my store. This will be the second time he's being transferred out of a store. Who wants to bet within two months he's asking if I want to transfer over there?...Yesterday was tech appreciation day. We received dinner, cookies, and a cake. Thanks to Jim, I nearly got sick from the cake. Next time I say I don't care what size piece you give me, make sure I can actually eat it all. Jim gave me a piece of cake the size of a tissue box. AFTER I had already eaten lunch and a few cookies...My web cam's finally up and running again, and I now have MSN messenger (dkreal1980). Unfortunately, that means I have a hotmail e-mail again. Dammit. Didn't I get rid of my hotmail accounts years ago because I went on a Microsoft strike?...Next up in Madden 2004, week four against the Bengals. I'm currently 3-0 after a 66-10 pasting of San Fransico. That following a tough 31-21 victory over Baltimore in which I couldn't complete a pass if my life depended on it. Against San Fran though? 9-10, 267 yards, and four touchdowns. Stay tuned for results of my next game.