MY LIFE - MARCH

March 31, 1999

I completely forgot that today was my sister's birthday. My goodness, she's 16 years old now. Thanks to the new driver law that Ohio has though, she can't get her full license just yet (you have to be 18 now to get that), which can either be considered a blessing or damnation. Depends on how you look at it. The story is, her birthday is today, and I've been so exhausted lately that it just slipped my mind. Today's my only other day off besides Sunday this week, so I really haven't had time to get anything even if I had remembered.

I must be really tired to forget that though. I've never forgotten a family member's birthday before, at least not to this extent. I usually remember at least a couple days before, but this time my mom reminded me. I don't even have time now to go to the mall and try and find her something since it's around 8:40. The mall closes at 9pm and it takes me 15-20 minutes to get there from my house, so I really can't get her anything. Then again, I don't if my mom got her anything either, since she hasn't exactly said anything to me about it until today.

My whole thing is I am really tired. I'm falling asleep as I write this. I'm feeling drowsy while driving. I'm feeling drowsy period. I just must not be getting any sleep at night or something or something else is off kilter. I don't really know. I'm just glad that spring break is here finally. I don't have to get up until 11am at the earliest since all I have is work the next week and a half. Which is an enormous relief and punishment all in one. No early morning passing out in school, but more time spent at work than I'd like. This is a time when I'd really just like to have been able to take my vacation and just relax for a bit.

That's something else I haven't had much of a chance to do, just to sit back and do something relaxing. Today I had off of work, but instead of getting to sit at home and rest, I had to go to Berea and get my car E-checked, which it passed easily. Just getting to the place was a headache for the most part since several events conspired against me getting anything done in a straight-forward way. But I'd really just like to relax for a little bit at some point. It isn't going to be happening anytime soon though. I work 1:30-10pm Thursday and Friday, 9am-5:30pm Saturday, might be doing something Saturday night, and with Easter Sunday, I'm probably going to be at my aunt's house, which is never stress-free. Believe me.

I probably won't be relaxed for at least a week, unless what I do Saturday proves to be relaxing. Hey, you never know though.

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The V.O.F.T. Dance Marathon was held today in the Brunswick High School East Gym, and needless to say, anytime you throw 500-600 students in a confined space, it's going to get pretty nasty. The whole hallway around the gym entrances smelled and there was a nasty warm breeze coming out of there. I guess the people had fun in there, even though some off the wall songs were played, while others were played a tad too much. I think I heard DMX's "Rough Rider Anthem" play about four or five times throughout the whole day.

The school's attempt at getting those not participating in the Dance Marathon to come to school failed miserably. There were probably less people in each class this year than last year, when the school didn't have a tough policy on missing the day. My biggest class had about 10 students in it while my smallest class had two. That's demoralizing when you walk into a classroom and find only one other person there. It's quite obvious that the school fell well short of its expected attendance level of 1200-1500 students, not including the 500-600 in the Dance. I would figure there were no more than 600 students in school that weren't part of the dance. It was really quite pathetic.

Just another attempt by a school to get control of its students being shot down by the students who called the bluff. Idiots. Now they don't get the help we had with our quizzes today. Suckers.

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As mentioned before, spring break now starts officially for Brunswick tomorrow. Spring break is the most difficult of all breaks to plan for because it falls on different days every year. I think last year it was in mid-April, now it's in the beginning of April. Two years ago I believe it was the end of March when we had spring break. It's really tough to get a consistent break-period when these damn holidays fall on different days. Easter is the most bizarre of all the holidays too. It's the only when that changes drastically every year for the most part.

God knows when spring break will be next year. Probably at the end of May or something.

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I am really exhausted. So much stress, so much strain, and so much uncertainty in things. It's taking its toll on me. I don't know how much more I can take, but it can't be much. I'm seriously considering asking to leave early on both this Saturday and next Saturday to give me a little more time to rest. Unfortunately, because I'm still in charge of the ad, it's unlikely that I'll get that break. In any case, I've made it clear that losing a lot of energy right now and that I'm ready to just give up on some things. I have very little energy, which leaves me with very little will power.

Oh wait, I never really had any will power in the first place.