April 16, 1999
Two nights in a row I've slept now. That's a very good thing. Best of all, I'm sleeping fairly well too. So well that I keep sleeping through my alarm, which isn't always a good thing. Haven't been late to school yet this week, or in the semester for that matter. No, being late or signing out isn't my problem. My problem lies with my attendance.
Since I can remember, I've always been besieged with various ailments, especially during winter, that have caused me to miss an average of 30 days of school a year. Now before you go jumping through the roof, keep in mind that in none of my classes except maybe one have I missed the most days this year. But my attendance has always been bad for various reasons, most of them due to illness.
Early on though, a lot of it was emotional and mental distress as I tried to cope with my dad coming home at 3 in the morning, waking us all up and causing a lot of fear in my life. I had a stretch where my stomach continuously hurt for more than two years and had gotten to the point where I couldn't remember what it was like to not have any pain. It was a terrible situation at home, and it had an adverse effect on my attendance, but not my grades. No, that didn't come until middle school and high school.
I would regularly be late or miss school, and I feel a lot of it was emotionally based because of all the problems at home. You try living in fear of an alcoholic and tell me how well you do emotionally. Throw in the terrible treatment from my classmates and alleged friends and you have a young kid in turmoil, which is exactly what my situation was.
As time passed, I began to get better, but this time I was really starting to get sick. By the time I reached middle school, I was regularly sick with one thing after another more than likely linked to a very weak immune system, something that still bothers me to this day. That's also when my grades began to drop a bit because I was so shy, so afraid to ask what I had missed. It was mostly psychological; I just couldn't get past it and still have trouble getting past it at times.
By the time I reached high school, it was eventually discovered that I suffered from allergies to cats, to pollen, and to a couple other minor things along with chronic sinisitus. That was what was responsible for the last three years, especially during the second grading period. However, the whole year is not lost though. I typically do very well during the last grading period, which is exactly what I'm doing again this year. My attendance level is highest during this time, and I have been known to go the whole quarter without missing a single day.
Being late isn't my problem at all. I've probably been late a total of 8 times in four years, 5 of them excused. I've only signed out a couple times as well, most of those excused as well. My problem is my attendance as a whole.
Today at work Steve and I got into our usual mode of mind and word games with whoever happens to be up front, this time being Jenny. No mercy is shown, none what-so-ever. She kept asking if the Indians were winning, to which we kept giving different answers before she finally realized that the game had been rained out. Then came her line of shut up and another question, this time about what we were talking about earlier. We had been talking about the NFL draft tomorrow, but we didn't tell her that right away.
Instead the usual round of games began, and we quickly had her going in circles and asking what we were talking about. Anytime she said what, we replied with a similar comment. It eventually got to the point where she became flustered and mad. That's when I mentioned that we were talking about the draft, which quickly led to more games as Steve went to eat.
It's so much fun to get Jenny flustered because she thinks so highly of herself. She has an incredible ego, which are the best kind to crush. She also gets very whiny, which presents more opportunities to attack her character and get her even more upset. It's not being mean, it's bringing her back down to us. Too often she acts like she's the smartest, most intelligent person around. We don't like people with egos. She has to be deflated from time to time.
A little later on, Jenny came up again while I was talking with Crystal. Crystal has now noticed that Jenny does a lot of complaining on just about anything and is starting to tire of it, especially since Jenny snapped a rude comment at Crystal earlier in the day. What had happened was Crystal's car had been giving her trouble, so she had been trying to take care of it, extending her break a lot longer than 15 minutes. When Crystal finally came back in, Jenny snapped "So how was your half-hour break?" oblivious to what had been going on. Crystal immediately responded saying she was staying a half hour later.
Two things bothered me about this all. Number one, Jenny had no right to say that, given the circumstance. Instead of being rude about it, she could have just asked what had been going on and been a little nicer about it all. Instead, she did what she does best and that's jump to conclusions about things. Secondly, Jenny is no angel herself and shouldn't be questioning the actions of anyone with seniority on her.
Later Crystal and I talked about just how whiny Jenny is. She will complain about anything, using the line "who cares?" more times than I can ever hope to count. She doesn't give two shits about rules and even complained about having to wear a name tag, saying that we didn't need to know her name. That pissed me off a lot. The name tag is not for our use, it's for the customer's use. Instead of whining about it, all she had to do is pin it on her vest and that would end the discussion. It's not hurting her, she doesn't like to wear one for whatever reason. I personally think it's because now she has to actually hang her vest up rather than just throw it anywhere and grab someone else's later on.
She does spend a lot of time whining though. It doesn't matter what either. I could be doing something, and she'll ask me why I'm doing it a certain way. I'll then tell her I'm doing it a certain way because it's how it's supposed to be done, and the first thing out of her mouth is either "why" or "who cares?" That irks me as well. I don't give a fuck if you care or not Jenny, but corporate wants it done that way so that's how I'm doing it.
She needs to learn that there is a reason we have rules or that we do things a certain way. Just because she doesn't like something doesn't mean she has to say fuck it and do it her own way. That's an irresponsible attitude, an attitude that I hate and one that Crystal's starting to get irked at. Crystal mentioned to me that she has noticed now that Jenny complains about a lot.
It's not her imagination either. Jenny seems to get a kick out of complaining. So we get a kick out of making her crazy. Don't get me wrong, I like her. I just can't stand her attitude sometimes.
Despite how I sound, I've been in a very good mood throughout the day. It goes back to the fact that I've been getting sleep again and have said the hell with my negative and down-trodden attitude. Part of this is because of Crystal at work and because I finally got to speak with Jennifer last night after a long time.
First off, Crystal won't let me go a day without smiling at least once. It's almost like a mutual goal we have. We spend a lot of time messing around with each other and doing off the wall things. She also likes to poke me in the side when she goes by, something she knows drives me crazy. I in turn like to mess with her head a little bit now and then, but not like everyone else. I do not pick on her, and it's because we've both been through some tough times. She in turn will not pick on me, only tease a little. We have a very good friendship as a result.
The best part of yesterday though was talking with Jennifer. She's been having computer problems the last few weeks and hadn't been online in more than a week. I really missed her and was very glad to talk with her. We had a very good chat too, and my spirits have really been lifted thanks to her. I didn't realize how much I really had missed her until we began talking. It was then that I felt my humor coming back to me in full steam. We had a great chat and I hope to talk with her again this weekend. I still also have hopes of getting together with her in the near future, but there are a lot of details that still need to be worked out.
I have the time of my life with those two people. One a good friend and the other someone I just want to be with very badly. So this week hasn't been lost.
I don't know about anyone else, but reading about Roger Clemens getting lit up by the Baltimore Orioles was sweet. I already hated the Yankees, but when they decided that they needed another great player, it really made me hate them. Which is why last night's game was sweet justice. I hate the Orioles as well, but my complacency lies deeper with the Yankees, a team who seemed to take things a bit too personal with the Indians last year.
That game was sweet justice and made the Indians only look even better. It also made Roger Clemens, a man who can't stick to his committments look even worse. I'm sorry, but I lost all respect for him when he ditched Toronto and when he tried to have any trade require his contract be re-negotiated.
On a sad note, the Indians were rained out again and could be rained out yet again tomorrow.
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