Senior Up-All Night
As you may or may not know, the seniors have the opportunity to stay up the entire final night of band camp without Conti, the staff, or the chaperones yelling at them to go to sleep. Since I am a senior and in the marching band I got to stay up all night with the rest of my class: Jason Biggs, Rusty Bluhm, Danielle Kline, Dave Knight, Jeff Kohl, Fran Szalay, and Sue White. The following is the traditional chronology of what the seniors did that night. You must know before hand of certain plots involved. First, Francis is trying to break the record for number of cups of coffee consumed in a night. The old record belonged to Phil Wood of my frosh year. Second, the seniors are trying to reek havoc on the complex we are staying in. Third, all of the seniors are trying to make it up the entire night. This being said, here is what we did!
11:50 Conti reads Riot Act
11:58 Francis' 1st cup of coffee
12:01 First non-senior bed call--failed!
12:03 Conti puts seniors to shame with one "Go to bed...now!"
12:09 Seniors discover TV in drum room does not work! Poop!
12:18 Sara says she's tired!
12:25 Mr. Peters reads paper. Sara says she's tired again.
12:30 Danielle Kline boasts about her acting. Boring! Conti, Mistah, and seniors ponder name of Italian Virginia Beach chaperone.
12:47 Francis and Jeff arrive at Big Blue River Crossing. They have decided to caulk the wagon and float, declining to ford the river or accept the Indian trade.
12:48 Francis finds some wild fruit.
12:49 Jeff dies of cholera.
12:50 Cup #5 [of coffee for Fran], nausia (sp?) begins to arrive. Burps are more frequent. Keep going!
12:55 Dave helps himself to a warm can of FAT (tm) (r)(c)1999 (U.S. Pat. #5,769,327)
12:56 Jeff, Sara, Dave, Fran, and Biggs got cold pizza. Yum!
12:58 John Whitehead's presence is missed ("Wait, when did he leave?")
1:05 Rusty does a failed cartwheel
1:11 Jason puts a road-cone on his head and lights his pants on fire.
1:20 Boring conversation about symphonic band, I (Susanna) am a concert band loner
1:21 Danielle thinks when will Conti go to bed!
1:21 30 seconds SILENCE!
1:29 Intellectual conversation concerning hot topic: Bat Boy
1:45 CONTI GOES TO BED!
1:46 Jeff changes his socks-Dave eats for the 3rd time
1:50 Biggs gives Rusty Fran-Cooties AND Sara realizes ceiling is too low for guard work (webmistress' note: Fran wrote this time slot and on the original he wrote "gaurd work". Now, normally I would just leave spelling errors be except that he has been doing this ALL SEASON!)
1:55 CHAPEL TIME (guard work)
2:03 Return from guard work (no broken lamps/bones)
2:17 Biggs plays tuba (poorly)
2:18 Fran tries to play tuba w/ Biggs (bad attempts)
2:20 Fran and Biggs attempt to configure tuba for marching band w/o much success. Sara and Danielle have disappeared.
2:26 Hunt for Sara and Danielle. Fran and Biggs have migrated to cafeteria.
2:28 Jason and Francis have tuba jam session in cafeteria. Francis has success converting tuba into marching mode. Biggs can't figure out how to put tuba back in case. Biggs: "My lips itch".
2:30 Hunt over. Sara and Danielle assumed to be in quad. We don't want to know!
2:35 Sara and Danielle go hunting and shoot 873 pounds of water buffalo, but they can only carry back 99 pounds. Only 6 bullets used. If you continue hunting here, game will become scarce
2:37 Thieves have stolen 34 sets of clothing, 3 axle yokes, and tipped over three oxen. You have one sets of clothing left.
2:39 Thieves (now known to be the "Hanson kids") have come back and stolen Biko.
2:40 Upset for letting 30 minutes pass without coffee, Francis drinks 2 cups spontaneously. Nausia (sp?) is returning. 10 down, 19 to go. :-(
2:41 Seniors jump in Time Machine and travel back to 2:38 a.m.
2:38 Rusty rolls in feathers
2:42 Rusty successfully taped and feathered
2:53 Silly String Raid #1 (Pete, Burf, and Newt catch us by surprise w/ string of their own)
2:55 Sara and Danielle decide to spend All-Night with Juniors after badmouthing Junioritis. Ironically, they are with the very juniors they laid blame on (or not). Go figure? (Hypocrits)
2:58 Senior night continues...seniors left: Jeff, Francis, Sue, Dave, and Rusty, and Biggs (for those of you who are slow, this means Sara and Danielle are OUT)
3:00 We're pissed, dammit.
3:01 Least-used hyphonated-words in descending order of usage in advertisement purposes: Owl-scented, low-quality, easily-broken, non-working, a**-tasting, fart-flavored, sugar-free
3:05 Spilt coffee becomes 3 cups of string coffee. Starting to feel really sick.
3:07 Sara and Danielle return...all is cool, all 8 seniors do a happy dance
3:08 Juniors make peace offering of silly string and penis plants
3:12 Biggs attempts a drumline pile-on, but finds himself awkwardly alone in his thinking
3:13 They're pissed, dammit
3:17 Put up crappy "Da Song" signs. Sara and Danielle are not hypocrits!
3:19 Lull in action...
3:20 ...
3:21 ...
3:22 Awkward silence runs amuk...Biggs still has not noticed the road cone on his head, and the flames engulfing his pants
3:25 375 pounds of the water buffalo meat have become tainted...Biggs attempts to eat it...and he dies of gonnorea and bloated fatness.
3:26 Yay Burf! Opinion of Juniors steadily rising...
3:27 Return to lull in action... *note* must steal Yahn's silly a** hat
3:30 Dave goes on solo mission
3:31 Dave has been eated by the hibiscus in the hall
3:41 Where's Dave?
3:41:30 Dave's back
3:42 Rusty begins to blow up plastic woman
3:46 Rusty finishes blowing up plastic woman
3:52 Plastic woman successfully propped in Conti's shower
3:56 Blowing up very *EVIL* black balloons
4:07 Fran is stuck to the ceiling by static electricity from balloons
4:11 Bathroom filled with balloons. 2 popped balloons
4:23 1st attempt to saran wrap Conti's door--failed--he woke up! "Seniors, good-bye!"
4:29 12 coffee cups lined up in a row. Pouring them down like shots of tequila
4:30 Silly string raid complete
4:34 Danielle, Jeff, and Sara attempt first round of tying doors together with twine. First attempt fails when Fiona opened the door and broke the chain. Sara ponders whether or not sleep will be beneficial. "I figure," Sara thinks, "that if I get 2 and 1/2 hours of sleep at this point it'll do me no good. I might as well try the final few hours for the heck of it. Please don't kill me when I fall off the podium tomorrow. Just leave me there and let me sleep!" Sara also fears the ever coming march-off. Sara also calls it quits with the twine. Danielle and Jeff keep trying, however. Sara's really bored and tired at this point. "I want my nice fluffy bed and about 11 hours of sleep!" She thinks. Sara shudders at the thought that she has yet to read all of her material for AP Euro and AP English and do the Antigone essay. Crap! (time finshed with monologue--4:41)
4:49 Only 5 cups more, and the record is mine!! (Francis writes)
4:55 3 to go, Francis wonders, "Is it really worth it?" He answers himself, "Hells yeah!" then erupts in a massive belch
4:58 Sara's got quite a potty mouth when she's tired. Toilet papering is well underway. Sara wonders how she's made it this long. Oh yeah. The Independent Press reports cops are going to patrol CHS daily to make sure school is safe in light of recent shootings. Bummer.
5:04 TP'ing done! A success! Also, saran wrap the right quad door is complete. Now, about Mr. Conti...
5:05 I (Susanna) have still made it, as do the rest of the seniors!!!!!!!!!
5:07 TP'ing gone crazy! It is all over the place and we can hardly crawl through it!
5:08 Getting harder to swallow coffee. I'm (Fran) the only drinker...geez! Down to 2 cups, hopefully I'll be done by 5:30.
5:09 Fran is amazing!
5:11 Dave and Sara root on Fran as we begin to watch Fran destroy Phil Wood's old record. Fran has also set the record for most times gone to the bathroom: 18 (so far).
5:13 FRAN BROKE THE RECORD AT 29!!! Yeah Fran! Way to represent the Class of 2000!
5:17 I'm sorry. I'm sorry to Josh's mom and Mike's mom and my mom. No matter what Mike says at this point, this was all my fault. I insisted on everything. I insisted that we do this project, I insisted that we travel south. I'm scared to open my eyes. I'm scared to close them. I'm tired and cold and hunted...what was that?...
5:21 Every senior is awake and going. And all have "March to the Scaffold" stuck in their heads! Arg!
5:30 Tying doors together may not be as successful as hoped. We will see what happens.
5:31 Saran wrapping Conti fails once again but he may have walked into it, so all wasn't lost. We bolted out, hopefully unidentified-phew!!
5:40 Danielle and Jeff and Dave finished tying/taping the doors together. Another success!
5:41 Dammit we lost Jeff!!! Noooooooo!!!!
5:46 Wrong! Jeff is still awake. *Note* Biggs went to retrieve the flashlight in the senior wing, and noticed that only the top roll of saran wrap was remaining. This probably means Conti NAILED IT!
6:00 Senior Night successfully completed, Fran did not puke after 30 cups
Francis Szalay
Sara C. Bradley
David Knight
Susanna Joan White
Danielle E. Kline
Jeff Kohl
Jason Biggs
Rusty Bluhm
In case you want a follow up to the night here's what happened:
Saran wrap didn't work on Conti's door, it either fell or was torn down. Conti did not hit it.
The boys in the quad didn't hit their saran wrap either
Tying the doors together didn't work. The tape wasn't strong enough and the doorknobs weren't really doorknobs. So it didn't hold. It works, however, in theory
TP'ing did work! Whoo-pee! And people had a difficult time making it through the TP maze
Fran broke the coffee record!
All 8 seniors made it up the entire night! Not to our knowledge has a class made it the entire night with everyone still awake!
We are all exhausted the next day
Conti punishes us for breaking the one rule: Going into the staff section
We had to clean up after breakfast, [Rusty and I had to] carry down the water jugs to the field, march in a "non-getting out" march-off, and we almost had to clean all of the public areas in the complex! We were saved though by the people who run the place, they were going to clean it for the incoming group.
All in all, it was a lot of fun. If you get to do it, don't whimp out, stay up the entire night. I think it's worth it!
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