THE FITNESS CENTER

And a one and a two and a.....Oh Hi, I'm so glad you came. This is the BEE GEES FUN
FITNESS CENTER. You know, we've all lived in that House Of Shame far to long and now
it's time to get into shape. After all, we want to be lookin' good when we finally get that
golden opportunity to fulfill our lifelong dream to meet THE BEE GEES. With this special
plan, you will not only look better but you will become healthier and be happier as well.
The first step in the plan is the INCREDIBLE BEE GEES DIET. It's easy, and it works.
Trust me, I know! The second phase is WALKIN' TO THE BEE GEE BEAT, and let me
assure you, workin' out with Barry, Robin, and Maurice can be lots of fun!!! So come on
Juliette, Angela, Elisa, and yes, even you Mr. Natural. This plan is gender friendly. You
don't want to be left out in the cold when your slender and attractive wife takes off for
Miami without you. So put down that fork, (oh my gosh, I've turned into Richard Simmons)
tie on those Reebocks and lets get goin'.

Barry, Robin, Maurice, and Andy flexing their muscles for Linda!

THE INCREDIBLE BEE GEES DIET
How do I explain my love for the Bee Gees?
It's a very strange affliction.
What draws me to these gentle men?
What's the cause of this addiction?
I don't love them like an uncle,
Like a father, or a brother.
I don't love them like my husband.
No no, he's my only one true lover.
To end my confusion and wonder,
I sat down to analyze
This attraction that I feel
For these three terrific guys.
I love them like a Peppermint Pattie,
My favorite candy bar.
Something else I cannot resist.
The quintessential treat by far.
So I began to compare the Bee Gees
To a Peppermint Pattie treat,
And I discovered that they are all COOL,
And DREAMY, and SPICY, and SWEET.
To start of you have the sugar sweet middle,
Guess what Robin, that's you.
Then to add that zip of peppermint spice,
A few drops of Maurice will do.
Cover this all with chocolate,
Like Barry flows over with his love,
And you have a special treat
That is sent from the heavens above.
Shape it into a circle,
The symbol of love never-ending,
Then wrap it all in silver
To symbolize it's humble beginning.
Now I know the reason for this obsession,
This constant craving that I feel.
At least there are no calories,
That's the best part of this meal.
So the next time I long for a Peppermint Pattie,
I'll reach for a Bee Gee album instead.
Then the sounds of their glorious music
Will fill my heart and my head.

Just look at these two eager beavers. They look like they just can't wait to step up on
that treadmill and walk along to the Bee Gee beat! I wonder where Robin is...hummm.
He is probably off somewhere eating potatoes. Tisk, tisk, tisk Robin!

WALKIN' TO THE BEE GEE BEAT

I'd become a FALLEN ANGEL.
I was so out of shape.
My body became a prison
From which there was no escape.

So I stepped upon my treadmill,
A modern day torture machine,
To reclaim the figure of my youth
And become more healthy and lean.

Each day I walked in agony,
Thinkin' this is all a BAD BAD DREAM.
But I had a definite goal in mind,
To become like a beauty queen.

Then I discovered the Bee Gees,
A new source of inspiration.
They not only provided entertainment,
But also raised my pulse and respiration.

Now each day I walk
But I do not walk ALONE.
Barry, Robin, and Maurice walk with me
While I sweat and pant and tone.

And I so enjoy their company
As we tread merrily along,
Because while I provide the action,
They provide the song.

So if you need some inspiration,
Then get up out of your seat.
Put on your favorite music
And walk along to the Bee Gee beat.

Please visit the following site which was written with
love and devotion and is dedicated to my loving husband Dave.
ON EAGLES WINGS.