| Chapter 2- I Cried |
| It was reaching 1 am and Jackie and Harold had long since gone to bed. Brian and Nick sat in front of the fireplace, sipping on the eggnog that Jackie had made as they laughed about times out on the road when they were young. " Remember that time when we cut Howie’s hair in the middle of the night and when he woke up and saw himself in the mirror he screamed like a little girl?" Nick said, trying to speak between bouts of laughter. "Oh NO! That was the best! You would have thought that we would have given him a tattoo!!!" Brian said now screaming in laughter. " Shhh! You’re parents are gonna kick us out, besides, Howie would NEVER get a tattoo!" Nick said, doubling over in laughter and falling into his best friend. They both fell onto the floor, laying next to each other and staring into each other’s eyes, remembering the laughter and fun they used to share on a daily basis. "I miss talking to you like this" Brian said, propping himself up on his elbow. He remarked how much of a man Nick had become. His facial features had become more defined, including stubble that he was growing on his chin. His hair was much shorter, even highlighted. Yet he noticed that the look in his eyes was still the same. It revealed that little boy that he had taken a liking to when the group first formed. Brian looked back on that exact moment when Kevin introduced the two. Nick had a mischievous smile on his face that till this day would reappear at certain moments. "I miss you… I mean it… too." Nick said, turning his now blushing face away from Brian. ‘I have to do it’ Nick thought to himself. He knew that it was now or never for him and Brian, he couldn’t lose him again. Nick suddenly felt Brian’s hand resting on his shoulder. "Nicky, there is something important I need to talk to you about." Brian’s soft voice said. Nick felt his heart drop to his stomach. Immediately he thought ‘Does he want me back? Oh God please, what if he did? Did he break up with Leighanne? Then I wouldn’t have to say anything, he can just do it for the both of us!’ but then he realized that his worst fears could have come true. do you remember how we kissed/ you said you never felt like this/ i guess i thought it'd never end/ you know that you are my best friend Brian sat up, his back facing the fire and Nick followed, facing Brian. ‘My Angel’ Nick thought as he noticed the light outlining Brian. His light hair glowed as if a halo was placed on his head. He had always called Brian his perfect angel. Nick’s thoughts soon turned back to reality as he felt Brian’s hands clasp onto his own. He then knew the severity of what Brian was going to say and swallowed hard, preparing himself for what was to come. "Nick, we’ve been through a lot. You know you're my best friend. You’ve been there for me no matter what. You were the one who stayed by my bedside with my mom when I was sick, was there to help me get back on stage, even when I didn’t want to, and held me those long nights when I was afraid I was going to die." Do you remember how we'd hold eachother tight/it was all i had to get me through the night Brian paused to wipe away a small tear that had trickled down Nick’s cheek as he remembered those frightening nights, he having to be the strong one as Brian sobbed in his arms. "Hey, but we’ve also had the best times. We’ve seen the world together and have had the greatest fun in every city, whether we went out and partied, saw the sights, or just stayed in the hotel so I could whoop your ass at video games." Brian said with a smile as Nick laughed, knowing that it was true. "Well that’s why I need to ask you something…"Brian’s voice cracked as he prepared to say what he knew would be important for both of them. This finally meant that he was going to marry Leighanne, spend the rest of his life with her and leave Nick behind, for good. He would never be able to hold him or kiss him again. Even though he knew it was what he should do and what he thought he wanted, there was always that doubt, what would have happened if he had never met Leighanne. Would he still be with Nick? He had convinced himself a long time ago that it would have never lasted with Nick. Leighanne and Kevin had helped him to realize that it was just simply an infatuation and satisfaction of lust. Plus, they were right, the media and for God sakes his family would never had accepted it. He was doing what he was supposed to do. He was fulfilling the life that he had been taught to follow as a small child growing up in his church. He was going to marry Leighanne and have a wholesome family, the way it was supposed to be…His nervousness was upsetting. He knew that Nick was his best friend and would never say no, but he didn’t know if either of them was ready for what it meant. ‘I just have to say it’ Brian thought. He looked into Nick’s eyes. Nick was holding onto his hands tightly and sweetly smiling. He was nervously smiling, part of him hoping that Brian would confess his love for him and the other part scared to death that this was it. "Ok…Nick, I proposed to Leighanne last night and she said ‘Yes’ and I was hoping that you would be my best man." Nick thought he was going to pass out. His head started spinning and his stomach tightened. The tears that he knew had been building released and he bit on his lower lip, trying not to cry out in disappointment, anger, and most of all sadness, emptiness…he had lost his angel. Yet Nick knew that Brian was truly his best friend, and they had promised each other a long time ago that they would be there for each other, no matter what. Nick saw the questioning look in Brian’s eyes as he awaited Nick’s answer. Nick flung his arms around his best friend and whispered "Of course I will Bri…I love you." Both of them held onto each other tightly, rocking back and forth, both crying as they realized that it was finally goodbye. Their love had come to an end and Brian sealed it by choosing to make a lifelong commitment with Leighanne. There was no turning back. i cried/ when you said goodbye/ after all that we've been through/ it's just so hard to give up on you |
| This chapter used lyrics from Joey McIntyre's " I Cried" |