Goddammit, it's not a purse!
Here, friends and stalkers, is the much anticipated follow-up to the "What's in my pockets?" page.
That's right, in yet another fit of downright boredom, I will dissect a personal item of mine and list all the junk that I think I need to pack around.
Just for your entertainment.
Enjoy, you voyueristic perverts.
Left front pocket
Melted mint flavored chapstick
Spare contacts case covered in chapstick
Visine Contact Lens Relief covered in chapstick
One chapstick encrusted toe ring
Two Lifestyles condoms (Ultra sensitive thin lubricated and Xtra Pleasure) covered in chapstick
Nail clippers covered in chapstick
A tampon covered in chapstick
Two old and probably expired scratch tickets
A coupon to save $2 on my next Advantix photofinishing order
Oooh, money!
A Lake Powell magnet
Right front pocket
Empty box of Lucky Strikes
Lint
Main pocket
Disposable Advantix camera (I'm taking another picture of myself right now)
My wallet
A concord grape flavored Linda's Lollie
Unmelted generic chapstick
Carefree Koolerz Citrus Splash sugarless gum
Unmelted Lake Powell chapstick
Grape Tootsie Pop
Pill bottle containing Ibuprofen and Tums
Checkbook
Raspberry flavored Linda's Lollie
A pen from the Luxor
Cherry Tootsie Pop
A rock
A Lake Powell pen
A rather beat-to-shit pack of matches
Bills (paid, thank you very much)
A receipt from the Western Safari Inn in Boise
A napkin with a priceless work of art on it (created by me of course)
Camel cash
Some random change rattling around in the bottom
Inventory taken September 19, 2001
What's in my non-purse now?
Back to the original pockets
Back to Hell
