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Or Tubby Little Titwitch, or Dominatrix Destroys Dance, or just plain old Seaneen, if you will. Erm, that's me. I'm great, and a lot more talented than Karl cos I can get my foot into my mouth, which is very handy if you're me. I'm actually the more serious of the two, which is shocking, cos...well. My favourite things (yes! It gets MORE interesting!) are the godlike League of Gentlemen, Monty Python, Blackadder and musicky types like the Manics or PJ Harvey and a whole lotta gothy shit and girl stuff, but not They Might Be Wankers, cos, well, they are. And I can read, as not many Ziners can, tsk. (Don't hit me!) Um, I'm in Belfast- another shitehole in Ireland, cos there are lots. And lots. And lots...I don't masturbate as much as Karl, I mean, have you seen his glasses?!
FAVOURITE FILMS: Life of Brian, Withnail and I, Leon, The Crow, Romeo and Juliet, Holy Grail, Rocky Horror, A Clockwork Orange and all the rest of it.
FAVOURITE SWEAR WORDS: Fuck, piss, arse, shit, bollocks, wank etc etc (It goes on a bit...)
BURNING LIKE CYSTITIS AMBITION: To be in the League of Gentlemen, or, even better, to write stuff that's funnier and greater. Or to be a brilliant novelist/poet/journalist/psycholigist/artist/twat. I might achieve the last one...
Me, the girl type thing with weird hair, quite intoxicated with my mate Jed. 'Twas funny, but not the next day when my brain tried to run for the door to phone Social Services.
And by that I mean, of course, do you want to become a staffer? For this site only, mind, I'm afraid we can't offer positions on other people's sites. Or maybe we could... hey, that'd be good for a laugh...
Anyway, if you want to work here (voluntary, non-paid work, natch), hang out with all the cool kids, and of course get a spanky little profile page all for your own, you'll first have to prove yourself. Oooooh is right, missus. All we really want is some sort of contribution towards the site, and your in. So it's not very demanding, is it? Email one of us, the addresses are all over the place.