Still deciding what is safe to share about myself, but here's a sample.

I may be married/single depending on who's asking and when. 

I tend to get drunk at weddings.  Here's proof.

I am a useless trivia master.  Therefore I dominate at old people board games i.e. Cranium, Trivial Pursuit, Taboo etc.

I like to read spy thriller novels.  Yes, my real life is that boring.

I am the first scoring option on my basketball team, no matter what a certain washed-up point guard says. 

I love to eat crawfish.  I would eat it everyday if I could.  And I do pinch the tail and suck the head.  Insert dirty joke here.

I make up some of the "letters of the month," which are really nothing more than thinly veiled jabs at my friends' love lives.  Although recently my dedicated readers have made my work very easy by contributing all of the "letters" and subsequent "advice."