Nickname/Character
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(Up)Chuck (Nun)Chuck Alex Architect
The McBobsey Twins Himself Paris, the agent, not the city
The Hardly Boys Cracker Jack The Major
The International Cabaret Terrorist Deputy Anything Jake Jake
The Toilet Terminator Cornball Goth Girl

Arthur Drake

Protector. Arthur Drake, aka Michael Galahad, aka (Up)Chuck. Arthur once used a stomach ailment as an excuse to leave an interrogation. Apparently, he didn't realize that he was to become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Shortly thereafter, a cruise to the Caribbean became Arthur's own personal nightmare. He became sea sick and spent the entire cruise praying over the porcelain altar. Later, his gastro-intestinal distress would cause him to suffer all sorts of indignities at the hands of French medical professionals.

Alex Bishop

Alex's cover job as an architect has coincidentally placed him at or near the scene of our ... um ... activities on a number of occasions. He doesn't seem to mind, though. I think he flourishes on being involved in our top notch spy endeavors! And his model rendering of a vermicelli Versailles was nothing short of brilliant.

Charles Katana

Assassin. In case you didn't guess, (Nun)Chuck shares a universal consciousness (or player character) with (Up)Chuck. That player is so attached to the Chuck part of his nickname, that (Nun)Chuck seemed the only appropriate nickname for this Orientally confused killer.

As (Nun)Chuck pursued his career as an assassin, it became apparent to the rest of us that the preferred milieu for his dirty deeds was the restroom. Not surprisingly, (Nun)Chuck is rarely accompanied by any of our team members when he goes off to answer nature's call.

Sean and Maureen McCafferty

Assassins. Sean and Maureen have had so many ... mishaps, that the McBobsey Twins was the only logical choice for the Irish twins. I mean who else would try to decapitate an already dead body with a bread knife?

Bob Diamond

The Boss Man. Need I say more?

Paris Mulhare

Logistics. If only Paris would stop going to the city of Paris. Her persistence in travelling to the City of Lights led to much report writing confusion, which necessitated clarification every time I mentioned her. By the way, anything that has the adjective lovely attached to it, most likely involved Paris, the agent not the city.

The Hardly Boys

The Hardly Boys refers to the unlikely pairing of John Rossi and the Orientally confused (Nun)Chuck. This pair is lucky to have achieved any degree of success during a really poorly executed kidnapping in Scotland.

Jack Payne / Jason Aquelone / Vince Larkin

Assassin/Technical. Who else would I refer to as Cracker Jack? Jack, the assassin - who rarely hits his target. Jack, the resourceful - who can solve almost any problem with a roll of duct tape and a crab mallet. Jack the Master Planner - who can come up with a hare-brained scheme for every situation you find yourself in, as long as it involves duct tape and a drop cloth.

Jack somehow became suspected of terrorist activities and attempted to disguise his identity with the assistance of some Parisian theatre performers, thus earning the nickname of the International Cabaret Terrorist, Jacques (La Lane). I have had hours of report writing amusement at the hands of Jack. If you need a good laugh, I strongly recommend reading about his exploits.

Annalee Knight

Protection. I know, you think she got her nickname because she has a major attitude, right? Nah, actually, it's because she was a major in the Marines. Of course, that kind of explains the attitude, doesn't it? Sometimes she gets a little upset with our ummmm - unorthodox methods. In fact, she has been trying to get transferred to a desk job for some time now.

Deputy Dana

Assassin. Deputy Anything refers to Dana Gibson, sheriff's deputy-turned vigilante-turned assassin. I blame him for my disastrous marriage to Rico Suave (see The Amsterdam Mission). I suppose it wasn't enough that he shot me in the foot. Any mission involving Deputy Do-Not-So-Gooder completely stretches the limits of my "D" vocabulary and my good manners.

Simon Timothy

FBI Agent. Simon Timothy (whom I get along with fine unless I am holding a beer bottle in my hand) once introduced himself to my team as Jake, Jake Something Or Other. He has been Jake Jake ever since. Word has it that he's not pleased with his double the fun nickname!

Richard Cahill

Operative. Richard Cahill, aka Robert Cornwell. Affectionately known to me (and those who spend a lot of time listening to me or reading my reports) as Cornball. Actually, while he always comes through in a pinch, this rule monger can be quite a pain in my ass. That fact alone led me to the realization that he needed a nickname. Using his proper name seemed too respectful. Of course, one needs to be careful about using certain people's nicknames in front of them...

Karin Volker

Investigator/Thief. East German born Karin was once shy and repressed. After what must have been several frustrating years in Cornball's close proximity, she returned to Berlin. The team is rather surprised to work with the new Karin, who likes to dress in leather and yell obscenities at other drivers.