A Lighter Side of Buddhism

Worse than a clown

There was a young monk in China who was a very serious practitioner of the Dharma.
Once, this monk came across something he did not understand, so he went to ask the master. When the master heard the question, he kept laughing. The master then stood up and walked away, still laughing.
The young monk was very disturbed by the master's reaction. For the next 3 days, he could not eat, sleep nor think properly. At the end of 3 days, he went back to the master and told the master how disturbed he had felt.
When the master heard this, he said, "Monk, do u know what your problem is? Your problem is that YOU ARE WORSE THAN A CLOWN!"
The monk was shocked to hear that, "Venerable Sir, how can you say such a thing?! How can I be worse than a clown?"
The master explained, "A clown enjoys seeing people laugh. You? You feel disturbed because another person laughed. Tell me, are u not worse than a clown?"
When the monk heard this, he began to laugh. He was enlightened.

Funny Comments

I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment.
-- Gotama Buddha

Things are not what they seem;
Nor are they otherwise.
-- Lankavatara Sutra

The Buddha was not really a god.
In fact, he thought it quite odd
That we go all around
Worshipping mounds
More mindless than peas in a pod!

"Don't just do something ... Sit there!"
-- Marge's comment on meditation.

As Buddhadasa Bhikkhu became more famous, busloads of visitors started visiting his monastery. Decrying many who went as if visiting an amusement park, he said, "Sometimes, I think many of these people just stop here because they have to use the bathroom".

"Hell was OK, until some wise guy went to heaven and came back"
-- Buddhadasa Bhikkhu

Funny Q & A

Q: What happens when a Buddhist becomes totally absorbed with the computer he is working with?
A: He enters Nerdvana.

Q: How many wives does Buddhism allow?
A: You may have as many as your tolerance for misery can bear.

Q: How do I become a Lama?
A: Go to a monastic university and study for twenty-five years. Begin by memorizing Vasubandhu's Abhidharmakosha with its commentary (500 pages or so). Then study what you have memorised by hearing lectures on it and debating the contents with other candidates until you can argue every side of every controversy equally well. Then memorise several works of Nagarjuna, along with their commentaries. Then memorise the seven treatises of Dharmakirti. In additional to that study, you must master several forms of meditation and study tantric rituals for about two or three years. Alternatively, you can come to America and just call yourself a lama. Billions of nubile virgins will follow you everywhere and give you money.