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Pick a site | Look at different sites available, paying attention to the ones that give more detail about the individual (i.e., location, whether they have kids, etc.) |
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Be Honest | If placing a personal profile be sure to be honest with what you put on it. If you are separated and working on finalizing a divorce, then say so. Also be sure and list whether you have children or not. This will help eliminate people who have different feelings about children. |
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Responding | When responding to a profile, don't use your personal email address. Most sites will set you up with a response email address that will keep the other individual from contacting you otherwise. |
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Correspondence | Once correspondence has been established, don't get into too much of a hurry to talk on the phone or meet in person. By my experience, I found that Lancelot and I found it easier to talk more freely hiding behind the monitor rather than trying to impress each other on the phone or in person. This gives you a chance to get as much information about the individual as you can before you actually meet face to face. |
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Investigate | If you find yourself attracted to this person, take a little more time to try to find out information about the individual. Most records are public and finding out as much information as you can before meeting can help to eliminate some of the chances of getting hurt, either physically or emotionally. Of course there is no way to be positive, but there is a chance you could find out something that you're not comfortable with. I let Lancelot know that I was investigating him, and he revealed some information to me before I found it on my own. Luckily the things I did find were very minor. |
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Phone Conversation | If you are happy with everything to this point, then it's time to talk on the phone. Being a woman, I prefer to get the man's phone number and make the first call. I had to pay for a long distance phone call, but it was worth it. I thought about the fact that I may find out something about him while talking in person that I would not be comfortable with. This eliminated the need to change my phone number later if needed. |
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1st Meeting | If you've made it to this point, congratulations! Meet in a public place, and don't give out your home address. Let a friend or relative know where you are going and the person's name that you are meeting. Give them any information that may be needed later....hopefully it won't ever come to something like that, but just in case. There are people out there that are not to be trusted, and hopefully you won't ever meet them. But, be safe, rather than sorry! Don't rush things! Meet this person in public places until you are confident about giving your address. |
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Congratulations! | If you have made it this far into the "relationship", congratulations! This does not necessarily mean that you are home free, but you're well on your way. Meeting someone on the internet is no safer than meeting someone in a bar or bookstore, you need to learn to be cautious and watch for warning signs. |
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