The sequel came down like a rock from the hills,
As heavy as millstones dragged out of the mills.
The booksellers trembled, the film- makers gasped.
The publishers' hands were first clasped, then unclasped.
They ran for their shelters, they ran for their lives.
They yelled, "We're in hiding until it arrives!"
The new Harry Potter book, scheduled for June,
Is said to weigh roughly as much as the moon.
It's certain to land with an almighty thump
That frightens the kittens and makes the cows jump.
With Harry, Hermione, Ron and their sort
Requiring more pages than King Arthur's court.
The count? Seven hundred and sixty- eight, flat.
It makes War and Peace look like Cat in the Hat.
Those wild Karamazovs in Feodor's tale Would look like a precis set next to this whale.
Forget about reading. This book is a gift For weight-lifters looking for something to lift.
Those seeking a volume to press their wild flowers
Could press entire gardens, or houses, or towers.
The youngest, not ready to read Harry's tome,
Could burrow inside it and set up a home.
It's only the title we'd care to adapt: The Order of Magnitude might be more apt.

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