Chapter 3: Playing in the Day
Next morning I woke up hugging my brother. It was a very warm night at his side. I like the how does he came at my side to sleep just like a little boy. I like how he turns red especially when he doesn’t have the control of any kind of situation. I woke up trying not to move him so he could rest a little more. I like to wake up very early in the morning to help mom making breakfast. I didn’t want to wake him up because dad always wakes him up earlier than me so he could get out with the dog.
Mom was boiling water when I came in into the kitchen; she loves to fix breakfast when we were together. When I was alone she does it too but these days she does it better. Menu for breakfast was warm milk, bread and eggs; we didn’t eat that but lately mom likes to watch cooking shows and she had decided to change some things in our eating.
-“Where is your little brother?”
-“He is in our room, he needs to sleep. You know dad wakes him up early”
-“Ok… What are you guys going to do today?” – It was a good question, we haven’t plan anything at all – “Are you going to go with your friends? Because I have to do some shopping but first I need to finish what I didn’t yesterday at work. I don’t want extra work for Monday.”
-“Don’t worry mom. Do what you have to do. I will stay here with Kouji doing homework then maybe we could get out to play with our friends” - that was a good plan for me, al least it has work for us quite a while.
-“Ok. Breakfast Hill be ready in ten minutes so it would be better if you could try to wake up your brother” – But it was not necessary, he was already there stand up by the door.
-“Are you going out mom? I think that today we will be at home together” – I look at mom, she looks very sorry.
-“I know honey but I can’t stop doing it; it is part of my work to keep everything in order. I promise you that next week I’ll spend all the day with you to”.
-“But next week I’ll stay with dad but don’t worry I know those things are important” – Mom was very sorry alter that conversation but as Kouji said those things were important. Kouji and I clean the table and began to do homework. We were good students, we make homework as fast as we can so we can enjoy the rest of the day together. We cooked together, I tell him what to do because he doesn’t know how to make lunch. We eat alone alter we finished to clean our own disaster. It was noon now so we decide to walk. We put our jackets for the cold and the hats mom has sewed.
Weather was not bad today, a little windy but it was normal in autumn. The leaves of the trees were all over the sidewalks and some pounds of dark water were at some spots of the street. We can jump some pounds but some were too big so we have to walk them by the side. We walk where our feet guide us, we didn’t have a final destiny but on our way we found Jumpei, it looks like he was going to go to Tomoki’s house so they can go together to Takuya’s.
-“Don’t you want to come with me? We can be together at Takuya’s house to spend the rest of the day and watch movies eating candies… what do you say? It was not going to be the same without you guys!” - I didn’t have any problem to go to Takuya’s place but I didn’t know if Kouji has one. He stares at me like asking me if I want to stay, I answered that I really didn’t care; it was the same for me. Jumpei keeps looking to us waiting for any kind of answered in silence. – “Do you have any decision?”
-“Ok! Let’s go!” – The three of us keep walking and jumping all over the pounds. We pick up Tomoki and continue our way this time to Takuya’s place that it was a bit far from us. The pounds were getting bigger as we were getting closer to our final destiny, Jumpei has to carry Tomoki so he could past some pounds, he was the smallest one of the group, and meanwhile Kouji and I help each other. Izumi was already sitting at Takuya’s living room. When we get in we try to warm ourselves drinking hot cocoa that Takuya’s mom offers us.
-“The true is that I wasn’t expecting you guys. Nowadays you prefer to spend your weekends alone, you forgot us”
-“In our way we found Jumpei, we didn’t know you were together all weekends watching movies”
-“Oh yes, we like to play but today is a bad day to play outside, that was why I invited them to watch movies” - Takuya takes out a box of the closet. The box was full of movies. – We have to choose one or two movies now… what do you want people?” – There were a lot of movies there and all of them show the preferences of the Kambara family very well. Most of them were cartoons that were for Takuya’s younger brother, a boy a Tomoki’s age, kids prefers cartoons. In other hand they have a lot of terror and suspense movies, his father loves that kina of movies, Takuya’s taste were more of action just like his personality.
-“Do you have something that doesn’t have action or violence?” – Izumi was not happy for those kina of movies. – “Well, I figure this up so I bring some movies from my house” – Now Izumi takes out of her bag a bunch of movies. All of her selections were to romantic and sweet for the rest of us. I hate girl’s movie.
-“Well I bring comedy ones!” – Jumpei has brought his own movie collection too.
-“I have some movies too! Mine are cartoons… I don’t know if you like cartoon ones but they are the only ones my parents allow me to watch” – The discussion of what movie match first started and after ten minutes they didn’t agree in anything. Takuya finally brings a solution.
-“All right! We put names of the movies we want to watch and the lucky will decide. Kouji will choose the lucky paper” – Everyone writes their own preferences, I choose a suspense movie, I like those kina of movies but there were some that makes me nervous. Everyone were crossing their fingers to win but what we all pray was for Izumi’s one not to won.
-“And the chosen movie is… who wants to see ‘Darkness’?” – That was my movie! Everyone has to accept my suggestion and prepared to see the movie. Jumpei reads the DVD box to know what the movie was about and thanks me for the election, after that he runs at Izumi’s side. Tomoki was the only one that has to go and watch movies with Takuya’s brother.
The movie was good I’m not going to deny it. In the big couch were Takuya, Izumi that could stop screaming, and Jumpei that was trying to calm her down. Kouji and I sit down a little far from the rest. I noticed that Kouji was nervous and was looking for my hand to squeeze it. I didn’t say anything; it was normal to show emotions and for him was a bit hard. When the movie finish everyone had screamed at least once, Izumi’s screams were the louder one and have been scarier than the movie. It was late now so we decided to return home as fast as we can. At night things were scarier especially if you have to walk alter seeing that movie. The dark of the night didn’t let us see the pounds in our way so when we finally reach the house our pants were al wet and with mood in the legs. Mom was already at home watching TV.
-“Hi! So how was your day?” – Mom was a little worry when she saw our pants. She pulls it out to wash it. We put our pajamas so we can walk in the house; she was not going to let us be outside any more until next day. We have a little lunch with mom before bedtime. Tomorrow was Sunday and Kouji has to go back with dad at noon to spend the week with him, we will meet again next weekend to be together but before that we have to survive the whole week in school between classes.
-“Kouichi?”
-“Yes?”
-“Can I sleep with you again? I don’t want to be alone in my bed”
-“Did the movie get scared you?” – He stays quite for a while trying to think my question or probable looking for a good answered. I like the way he thinks but he has to learn to answer according the way he feels and not to be in grace with the others.
-“A little… but I think that you were the only one that noticed” – he stays in silence again – “Kouichi? Do you think that it is good to… well… thinking what happen the other day… you know… is it right that we feel this? I mean… we are brothers… maybe we shouldn’t…”
-“I was thinking the same but I got a conclusion” – Now I have all his attention – “If I love you and you love me then we didn’t need to care. We can’t live wondering what the others thinks about us, everyone have their own things and we can’t depend on the rest denying our tastes and feelings just to be in grace with them. To love is not a felony… isn’t it?”
-“No… but… we are brothers… we shouldn’t”
-“We haven’t do anything wrong. We didn’t harm anyone. How can I explain you Kouji that we shouldn’t do things just because they are good or bad, we have to do them because that’s the way how we feel? Nobody can order you to do something if you don’t want to do it” – I get closer to him and give him a kiss on his cheek – “How many time were you thinking that?”
-“Since… a while a think… I was scared to tell you for what we spoke Friday but the true is that I don’t know if it is ok or not…”
-“Maybe you didn’t noticed but you will see little by little” – We get inside the bed to sleep. We hug each other to sleep, it was weird to find comfort in that way, I like my brother to be direct… he did it sometimes but it was becoming more frequently… I like him to express his feelings openly even if he doubted inside especially with the fact to show completely to others.
Next morning I woke up hugging my pillow, Kouji was already awake because I didn’t see him in any spot of my room. I get out of my room into the living; mom was sit at the dinner.
-“Kouji?”
-“He is parking his staff, now is getting his clothes out of the laundry” – Mom was sewing some things for the living. Usually on Sundays everything was a little fast. When Kouji returns with dad he usually does early for lunch. Sometimes he stays until noon but others dad calls him to return as fast as he can or he comes to pick him up. When Kouji was not at home I stay only with mom and we spend the noon very peacefully. We stay at the living room reading or listening music, if there were a lot of homework then I use the time to finish it.
Kouji gets out of the bathroom ready to go. He was wearing his jacket, scarf and hat all of them make by mom. His backpacks were at the door, the school one and the one he brings full of clothes for weekend. He picks up his pencil case he was forgetting at the table.
-“You have to eat breakfast”
-“I can’t now, I love to but I have to take the train that goes at nine to be at home by ten. Dad wants to eat at a restaurant today and I still have to leave my things at home”
-“You have at least to take a sandwich or something to eat on your way. The breakfast is the most important meal of the day!” – Mom took some chocolate biscuits and put them in his backpack asking him to eat them in the train. She kissed his cheek and let him go.
-“See you later Kouichi! Remember next week you have to go to my place!” – I remember it perfectly that I have to go to his place next week. It was a little far from here but I didn’t have any problem to travel.
-“Yes I know! We are going to see each other at school tomorrow son don’t be late!” – I remind him. Usually hi was late on Mondays, the other days he was there at time, I didn’t know if it was because he stays sleep or what else. Kouji gets out of the house carry all his stuff, the way to the train station was short but carrying all his things plus the pounds in the streets… I was completely sure he was going to have problems to get into the train. I run to change my clothes and hurry up to reach him. It was windy outside, wind hits hard and menaces to blow my hat. It was difficult to walk especially when something invisible pushes you. I try and I reach him three streets down mine. He was stand at the corner under the light box waiting for the green light. I was in time to help him, without me he would had miss his train. He thanks me and before he enters into the train he gives me a kiss… in my lips. I couldn’t react in time, I didn’t know what to do but it was too late because the doors of the train closed at my face and then… he was gone. He was waving his hands, his eyes trying not to look directly into my eyes but his cheeks were all red. I didn’t get mad with him, I was angry because he was still trying to hide his feelings and he was still believing that it was bad and forbbiben… when was he going to understand that to love was not bad? I would prefer to give that first step… his kiss has been simple and innocent but strong enough to move my floor… if this little and innocent kiss has been like this how was going to be a real one?
Chapter 4: Hiding
in the Night
I was going home sitting alone in on of the compartments of the train, I was feeling a little weird about the kiss I gave to my brother before I got in the train. I know that I shouldn’t feel in that way about my brother, I was a little impulsive in that moment but I couldn’t resist anymore. The way home seems shorter when I was thinking about my brother and how I spend the weekend with him and mom… I was going to se him again tomorrow at school but mom… to see her I have to wait about two weeks that is the time to go to her home again. Our lives have change, trip was long but it was a good time.
I get out of the train carrying my clothes and my school books, I climbed the ladders and run into the principal door of the train station, Crossed the street and walk all through the avenue… turned left three blocks then turned right tour more blocks down, turned in a corner and I was finally at home. Temperature was a little hot inside the house cause outside was freezing, my hands were a little sleep because of the cold and my nails have a purplish color. Dad and mom were already waiting for me at the living room reading the newspaper; I left my stuff in the front door and went inside to say hello.
-“I’m home!” – dad looked at me while he was reading and mom smiled at me as soon as I enter.
-“You run out of time! I need food! Why are you so late?” – mom look with a reproached llok to dad.
-“I woke up a little late and have to take the train with stops. I’m sorry”
-“It’s alright. Kouichi is coming next week? – mom ask in time just to change the subject.
-“Yes, he told me he was coming”
-“Stop talking and get into the car!” – dad left the newspaper at the table and goes out of the house, he seems very hungry, that was the only explanation for his bad humor. My dad was used to eat always at the same hour.
-“Are you mad because I’m late?” – I asked him just in case, it is good to be sure so that’s how I know how to react in front of him.
-“I don’t think it is a good idea. Yesterday your dad have a bad day and to day he just hake up a little moody. Don’t worry he will be fine after dinner” – I stay quiet and trust in her instinct to solve this kind of mystery’s.
At three o’clock we went to a traditional restaurant that was located in the principal avenue. His bad humor stays with him all the day and the bad part of this was that he really was getting me upset. We tried not to upset him more in the rest of the day. What I did was to disappeared and stay in my room for the rest of the day and didn’t get out until she call me to eat, I couldn’t say I was not hungry because that could make thinks a bit… difficult.
-“So what did you do the whole weekend?”
-“I was with my brother. We did homework together and then we took a ride, go seen some movies with our friend at Takuya’s house. We return to home early to spend time with mom too.
-“You didn’t help clearing anything?”
-“Well… I help in the kitchen!”
-“That’s great! How was school? Did you finish all your homework? Did you study? Any test for tomorrow?” – Dad ask me to many things in so little time… sometimes I think it was to make me feel bad, like he was trying to bother me.
-“School was fine, I already did all the homework with Kouichi and there is not going to be any test for tomorrow”
-“I don’t care about it. You should know everything in anytime. After dinner we are going to go upstairs to test you”
-“But dad… there is no test for tomorrow!”
-“I don’t care about it! You should be the best!” – Dad always said that. We stay that night studying every single book for tomorrow until eleven o’clock, hopefully I keep myself awake even when my brain was begging for rest. Only when dad was sure I know everything he let me rest. My bed was cold… could this be because it was freezing outside?
Next morning I woke up because of the sound of the alarm. I took a shower because I couldn’t do it yesterday night for obvious reasons. I dressed and run to take the train. Hopefully I get in school in time, just before the bell runs. But I sep running until I get into my desk to lay and die. Takuya who sit in front of me have his eyes on me all the time… a hand touch my back and bring me back to earth…
-“Did you have a bad day yesterday?”
-“I need to sleep Kouichi… I really need to sleep!”
-“So you stay awake until what tour this time?”
-“Studying? Are we having a test today?” Takuya grab the book that was closer to him and try to study something.
-“There is no test for today! My dad loves to make me study even if there is no test! When he did that he forgot the time. We stay awake until eleven” – I try to find comfort in the desk putting my backpack like a pillow but was impossible and to turn things against me the teacher comes into the classroom. The whole class Kouichi tries to keep me awake but my eyes close all the time but Takuya was getting advantage of this situation and through me pieces a his eraser.
-“Mister Kambara we are not in war so please stop shooting your friend. Mister Kimura… I know you are trying hard to keep mister Minamoto awake and… MISTER MINAMOTO! Could you please pay attention? I’m going to give you a very important announces!” – I was already awakening with the double mention of my second name but I still need to sleep. – “As I was saying, this year in the especial week of lecture we are representing an act. The play was chosen by the teachers of the area. The play is ‘Snowhite’ and the part will be choosing by lucky, every part except the principal one” – I was feeling that this was going to be an unpleasant surprise by the time she was walking between the disks. – “Our ‘Snowhite’ is a character that has specific characteristics. What I want now is find the one that is going to take this part of the play and I want you to choose him o she. Snowhite was very pale like snow and her hair was very black so… do you have someone on mind?” – It was like the teacher has Kouichi or me in her twisted mind because she just stands up by our desk.
Everyone begin to think who could act for the play. I try to be invisible because it was a matter of time for our names to be spoken. I was suspecting in everyone, everyone could say my name but what I didn’t expect was for my best friend to say it…
-“Kouichi and Kouji! Both of them fit in the character! They have very black hair” – I was wishing by the time to have a time machine to have time to get sick and stay at home... I was going to kill Takuya.
-“I was thinking in them too but we have to choose just one of them. The other one could be in the play only if the other gets sick or something bad like that. Now choose one!” – Everyone write a name in a piece of paper… only one of us will be the one and I couldn’t stop wishing for my brother to get the play. I hate to act especially in front of a lot of people… and if I forgot the lines? When the papers were wrote the teacher takes her time to count all the votes… silence was killing me and my hands were sweating and I couldn’t stop shaking… for a little moment I feel Kouichi’s hand taken mine to give me some strength…
-“Kouji you will be our Snowhite!”
-“No! This couldn’t been happening to me! I’m a boy! Couldn’t this being preformed by a girl? Why me?”
-“Your classmate have choose you for the play so you can’t let them down, we trust you two” – I stay in silence… I didn’t like the idea of everyone trusting in me but they were really trusting in me… We haven’t even start and I was beginning to feel the pressure.
-“Don’t worry Kouji, no one is going to make fun of you. Take it easy… we could learn our part together”
-“I don’t care about that… it is just… I have to wear a dress, the practices, the public, people staring at me, I have to tell this to dad and mom and our mother. I don’t have problems with them but I don’t know how is going to take this dad…”
-“And what is he going to say? The class and the teacher choose you… you couldn’t do anything”
-“Kouichi… he is going to make me learn everything, he is not going to let me rest until the play is over” – Dad was a perfectionist and a little bit obsessive in everything. Everything that was related to him must be perfect and this has to be apply even with the garbage. Maybe the problem for me was not dad pressuring me o people starring at me… I think it was that I really didn’t want to disappoint him.
After the classes we were ask to stay a little bit so we could begin reading the scripts. I was not the only one who disagrees with the rolls. Izumi was going to be the stepmother and witch of the play, she doesn’t like to be the ugly one but she decide to take this like a personal thing. I was scared when I found that the prince was going to be Takuya. It was a horrible for me to have to be the princess of the tale to have now for the prince my best friend. The other boys and girls were the dwarfs, the mirror, and the animals of the woods. Other boys that were more lucky than me were in charge of the lights, stage, the music, sounds and another group of noisy girls were the ones in charge to prepare the costumes
-“Kouji… come” – Kouichi calls me when the first reunion finished to picks up our backpacks and return to home. We get out of the school and walk down to the train station – “I would like to talk to you… about something”
-“What do you want to talk about? Is there any problem Kouichi? If you want you can play Snowhite…” - Kouichi’s tone of voice sounds a bit discourage so I tried to calm him down with a silly answer… I know he will never accept my part in the play.
-“Look… it is about yesterday and us…”
-“I know I shouldn’t do that, I’m really sorry, excuse me please. It was not my intention to bother you but I promise I will never do that again and if you wish not to see me anymore then I can go, really I understand it, I…”
-“For God’s sake! I was not going to tell you that I don’t like it! I was going to tell you that I like it, it just took me by surprise. You didn’t have to apologize, everything is fine between us, there’s nothing wrong, nothing to regret!”
-“So?”
-“ I just wanted to tell you that I like the fact that you give that first step, I didn’t want to make you do it but I was thinking in that too” – we get out of the stairs and search for my train – “I love you so much Kouji… hope you didn’t have any doubt about it” – I just close my eyes to think a little better in his words that were still traveling across my brain. No one says that to me in these days, just him. I was the one surprised this time when I feel his lips. It was my wish to stay with him in that moment and never return home but if I didn’t get that train then I couldn’t get it in an tour at least. I get in the train but all the way I feel like I was floating. I walk to my house thinking in him, shouldn’t be in that way because I almost get killed by three cars. I run into my house directly into my room, I through my backpack and fell in my bed. This was a good day after all… even if I was ‘Snowhite’…
I wanted to sleep but I began ping my homework and study everything just in case dad ask for it today. I eat dinner with mom, dad doesn’t show up until very late, it seems that he had a celebration at his work. This night I could sleep all my daily hours or at least the hours I was used to and maybe my dreams would be perfect if the wind doesn’t have make all that noise. One of my big problems was to try to sleep again.
I woke up next morning feeling a little tired but this was a long day too but it was a long day with my brother. I manage to go to the table to take breakfast this time; mom and dad were there already. With one open eye I tried put some butter in my toast and drink my orange juice.
-“Yesterday I come late so I hope that you have studied for today” – with that kina of questions he always woke me up.
-“Yes dad, I’ve study like always”
-“I hope so. So how was your school day yesterday?” – this last question was a little bit strange even for him… does he knows?
-“Well… nothing special”
-“And what part are you going to do in the play? Or it is nothing special?”
-“How do you know?”
-“Your mom told me all about the play. We meet each other yesterday at the train. So… you are?” – I wasn’t expecting this from my own mother
-“Well… I really don’t like it… I’m not happy with this…”
-“Your part in the play is?” – I could notice some kind of angst in his voice… he really wants to know it…
-“I’m Snowhite” – I heard them laugh. – “it is not funny! A girl could performed that but I get the roll only for my stupid black hair! Because it is too black! Couldn’t they were any long hair or dye their heads? Why me?”
-“Stop your stupid protest and begin to memorize all your parts! I guess you are going to study that with your brother don’t you?”
-“if you knew wich was my part in the play why did you ask it to me?”
-“I prefer to heard it from you or weren’t you going to tell me?” – He was right… I was not going to tell him at least at the same day of the performance…
The conversation ends there because it was getting late. Everyone runs out of the house, I was left in the train station and they went to their work. I get in to school just in time. This day was more normal than yesterday and the online thing out of normal was the practices. It was boring to be there reading all the scripts. After these Kouichi and I went to his house so we could begin to learn all our lines. The idea was nice but I haven’t asked for permission. The permission wasn’t hard to get the problem was to try to contact with them and ask for it.
I looked for a telephone a tour break. I call my dad first and like always his movil rings but he never speak. I have to call him at his office… it was bad to forget my movil at house… with that things would be easier.
-“Hello… May I speak with mister Minamoto?”
-“In these moments he is not at his office. What’s your name? Could I take your message?” – damm!
-“I’m his son… Kouji. So.. when is my dad coming?”
-“I don’t know. Do you want him to call you?”
-“No, just tell him I call him and I’m calling him back in three hours so please he must answer his movil” – that was my only plan. Other option was to call Tomoko but I couldn’t remember her work’s number. It doesn’t matter now, I was going to call dad in the next break. Hopefully I was luckier this time…
-“Hello? Dad?”
-“Hello Kouji… What’s your problem son? Did you forgot your cell phone?”
-“Yes I forgot but I was calling you for a permission, I want to go to Kouichi’s place. We are going to make our homework and learn our lines… could I go?”
-“Ok, but when are you going to go home?”
-“I don’t know… Could I sleepover with mom or maybe you could come to pick me up..”
-“Impossible… I was not planning to return home today… I will return to home but it is going to be very late! It would be better if you return to home by your own, your brother is going to go to our home in the weekends right?”
-“Couldn’t you pass by Kouichi’s house late then?”
-“Allright… then we can study all the stuff you have all the way home just to stay awake” – This was beginning to turn into a bad idea – “Then see you later Kouji, I have to work now”
-“See you later”
-“So… what did he said?” – Kouichi was all the time by my side hearing everything but ask me just in case.
-“I have permission and he is coming to pick me up very late so he could see if I really study. I’m beginning to get tired of this”
-“Cheer yourself, alter all we are going to study at house and make our homework and learn our lines. You learn faster, that helps!” - Kouichi was right but it doesn’t excite me very much.
We went at his place alter the classes. I could see my mom before she goes to work, we have enough time to lunch the three of us… I like to come here in the mid of the week because it was always a good idea.
When mom left the house we clean the entire kitchen and began to do the homework. Mom’s soup was so warm that I feel the necessity to sleep a little bit, if not then my eyes were going to close and my homework was going to stay there forever.
-“Maybe you should sleep for a while, at least half an hour to rest your eyes. Why don’t you take a nap?”
-“ Really? But if I take a nap maybe I’m not going to wake up and never finish my homework…”
-“You are going to finish it! Your sense of responsibility will wake you up, after all dad is going to test you in the car”
-“Thanks for bring me that to my mind, I don’t want to sleep anymore… have to study… ”
-“Relax, you can’t study like this. Do what I told you and have a break. Sleep half an hour and you would feel fresh to study”
-“Alright… but try to wake me up please” – I walk away from the table to the couch at the living room.
-“Wouldn’t it be better if you go and rest in our bedroom? Bed is more comfortable than a couch” – he was right but I dind’t want to go alone to bed…
-“I’m feel fine here!” – Kouichi doesn’t pay attention to my words and keep saying for me to rest in the bedroom. Finally he ends pushing me into our room and lying me in the bed. – “I don’t want to sleep anymore Kouichi… really”
-“Don’t be nonsense and close your eyes please” – I did what he told me and try to relax closing my eyes. I count lambs jumping a bench but I only reach to the third one because it was so boring in that way. Then I feel my brother’s hands that were trying to relax my head and neck.
-“It feels good!”
-“Do you want a complete massage? Mom taught me how to do it… maybe she should do it one for you… it really helps!”
-“You are doing it fine!”
-“Well then I’m going to try to do it one, you will be my lab bunny!” – I accept to be his experiment and lay face down just like he told me. I close my eyes and wait for his hands. His fingers were pinching my neck relaxing it instantly, my shoulders were beginning to relax too because I feel them like jello. The massages were good and to be truth they give me more energy. –“Do you fell better?”
-“Yes, thanks to you!”
-“Well, now pay me!” – I was surprised for my brother’s request… I thought it was free.
-“But… I didn’t bring a lot of money today…”
-“Silly! I don’t want money!” – his lips were closer to mine and without noticing they were stick together. Without noticing I was laying on the bed kissing with my brother. It was the first time that I was feeling his tongue inside my mouth and it fells like a dream come true. But when I feel like the situation was out of control I try to stop it…
-“Wait… we can’t been doing this”
-“No, you are right… I think I left me go. I’m sorry, I didn’t want you to feel like this”
-“No, it is not like that… it is that I feel this is not correct and my half an tour finished” – I feel strange but I couldn’t feel like that because he was going to feel bad with himself and tha was not my intention. We both stay quiet for a while and then we get out of the room and begin doing homework.
Hopefully we didn’t have a lot of homework for next day, just a few math problems and a couple of sentences in English. When we finish Kouichi went to the couch to watch his TV show meanwhile I try to study something more and when I finish we begin to practice for the play.
Our dialogue wasn’t a lot and that’s because Snowhite was sleep. The dialogues were simple and that was good because it was our first time acting with a principal roll and the possibilities to miss something were high especially with hard words. A hard thing to do was to try to module our boy voices. The difficult part of practices were the kiss part but it was difficult not only because I was practicing it with my brother, no, it was difficult because my real partner was my best friend Takuya and I couldn’t imagine how was going to be the practice with him.
-“What are we?” – that was my question and Kouichi seems not to understand because he didn’t answered.
-“Escuse me? Aren’t we brothers? You are asking about what?”
-“Well… something like that. I know we are brothers but are we something more?”
-“You mean like boyfriends?”
-“Yeah… I’m not asking you for it but… do you know what we are?”
-“I didn’t know but if it make you happy then we could be something” – I began to think. The question have come without a motive but it was something that was in my mind since yesterday. Our relationship like brothers was stronger and the kisses we gave was something. The silence was deeper than ever and was becoming uncomfortable. – “Kouji… do you want to be with me in a formal way?” - his words moves me… That question was what I think it means? I didn’t answered at that moment… I just give him a kiss… something more than a simple word…
That night we stay together in the couch waiting for someone to come. The first one was mom that was so tired that eats and went to bed. Dad didn’t come until later so I went to rest with my brother. I lay at his side until dad arrives and I have to get up. The only thing that gives me hope was that I will see him again in a few hours or as soon as the classes begins…
TBC…