What Women Really Mean At long last... The Men's Guide to what a woman really means when she says something. Pay close attention (there might be a quiz later). You want = You want We need = I want It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now. Do what you want = You'll pay for this later. We need to talk = I need to complain Sure... go ahead = I don't want you to. I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron! You're... so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! = I'm on my period. Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs. This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house. I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper... I need wedding shoes = the other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of white. Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there! I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep. Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive. How much do you love me?= I did something today you're really not going to like. I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V. Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful. You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me. Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're dead.] Yes = No No = No Maybe = No I'm sorry = You'll be sorry. Do you like this recipe? = It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to it. Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep. I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important. All we're going to buy is a soap dish = It goes without saying that we're stopping at the cosmetics department, the shoe department, I need to look at a few new pocket books, and OMIGOD those pink sheets would look great in the bedroom and did you bring your checkbook? The answer to "What's wrong?"
The same old thing = Nothing |