Deciding what to wear on a date is a problem, especially for the gay man. Think utility and take your time. You can only be fahionably late if you're working on your fashion. Here are a few tips:
* Don't overdress. Should your date come to it's natural conclusion and you have sex, overdressing means you have too many layers to remove. It just makes things easier to keep to one or two layers. If you find that you are overdressed, in comparison to your date or to others in the restaurant, then you must act as if you are over-educated. Over-educated people are always overdressed. Be sure to speak loudly so accompanying tables can hear you, and say things like, "Did you know that 'CACA' in Swahili means 'brother?'"
If you find that you are underdressed, that is okay. Underdressing implies a laid-back attitude, but it can also make people think you are poor. To counter this, speak loudly again, only say things like, "I can't believe Lufthansa lost my luggage when I changed planes in Zurich."
* Never wear anything brand new. Old clothes are more hip.
* Always wear briefs, never boxers. Briefs will better hide a sudden erection.
* Avoid itchy socks
* Never wear any jewelry bigger than a pack of cigarettes.
* Do not, under any circumstances, wear oxford wing tip shoes. (Especially brown ones)
Before leaving to pick up your date, it is vital that you practice the following things:
* Draw a target on a piece of paper and tape it to the wall. Now take a spoon and practice flinging food as far and as accurately as possible.
* Practice swallowing air, then burping it out as loudly and obnoxiously as you can. If you can pass gass on command, that is even better.
* Think of three abnormal bodily functions and be prepared to discuss them at length.While you may not immediately see the utility in these things, they may become quite usefull, as you'll see in the CONVERSAION section.
Now you are ready for your date.