As discussed in the introduction, dating is really just something to do before having sex. Since this is the natural conclusion to dating, thereare some very important things to remember:
* If you buy condoms (or dental dams) before going out on a date, you will surely not need them.
* You may NOT have sex without the use of a condom.
At first glance, this presents itself as a problem. But you can get around this catch-22 by asking your date to bring condoms. Of course, they are subject to the "if you buy them, you won't need them" rule as well. But since YOU didn't buy them, you may simply borrow one from them.
Sex has changed in the last twenty years, due to the dangers of sexually transmitted diseases. But one thing that has not changed is that sex still requires you to be completely, or partially, naked. Spending time in front of a large mirror, twisting and contorting your body around, will give you an idea of the angles from which you are the least attractive. Avoid exposing those angles when having sex, unless the lights are off or if your date is ugly from any angle.
Finally, be aware that there are many kinds of sex. A few of them are listed below:
* ORAL SEX -- Contrary to popular belief, this is simply talking dirty.
* SADISM -- Sadists like to inflict pain. All mothers are sadists, as are dentists, bill collectors, and congressmen. The IRS is a government sanctioned sadist organization.
* MASOCHISM -- Masochists like being in pain. People who call their mother regularly, get regular dental check-ups, refuse to pay their bills, and vote are masochists.
* BONDAGE -- People into bondage are married and live in generic looking houses in the suburbs. They can also be sadists or masochists.