(10-23-98)I caught the end of the Love Boat with Nash and Goldberg, and that has to be the worst show I have ever seen in my life. Here the highlights(lowlights?):
-Nash hit a pretty good Sidewalk slam on Goldy through a table though.
-And at the end Nash and StoneGold were singing "Wind beneath my wings" which made Jewbacca look like a jackass, but someone singing that song was funny the first time it was done on Seinfeld when Kramer sang it to Bette Midler when George knocked her out playing softball.
-And only Wee Willy Goldberg looked like a jackass singing because Nash is a goofy guy while Greenberg is supposed to be this no-feeling(or shall we say "stone cold") person.
(10-23-98)I was watching Space Ghost, which is the greatest cartoon on TV, and the Macho Man was Space Ghost's grandfather. He looked just like Space Ghost but with a grey beard and cane. Here are some highlights:
-He revealed that he beat Moltar's dad in a steel cage and he made him "weep like a woman after his patented piledriver."
-Then he made Space Ghost go fight crime and he took over the show.
-He then got in a fight with Rob Zombie.
-The best line was when he was yelling at Zorak and he said this gem "Why 20 years ago I would of put your head in a half nelson, twisted it around, sing each letter of the alphabet on every turn, and when I reached the first letter of my true love's name, that would be the Lovely Elizabeth. I would yank your head clean off and roll it down the pike like a bowling ball!!!"
-Then he interviewed the girl from the Cosby show(not Rudy, the other little girl), and he told her who he beat up with the "dreaded purple nurple, cherry belly. OH YEAH!"
-Then the girl was showing him how she can bend her pinky back and he said "don't you raise a hand to me missy, I'll put you in the figure four leg lock."
-Then Zorak knocked him out with a chair and Space Ghost came back to find his grandpa knocked out.
-And Zorak got his ass kicked by Grandpa when he woke up.
-Then at the end these aliens came to beat up Space Ghost and he hid under his desk, so Grandpa flew out to kick some ass when he teamed up with the aliens to kick Mary Hart's ass.
-The end to another funny ass episode of Space Ghost.
(10-26-98)This has nothing to do with...well anything, but here it is anyways. I was taking a dump today and when I went to wipe my ass I noticed the toilet paper had these angels on it. So in my mind I'm thinking "Isn't that blasphemy to put turds on an angel?" But I wiped my ass with it anyway, so I'll see you in Hell.
(10-26-98)Sting looks soooooooo retarded with a goatee. Did you ever see that episode of Seinfeld, when Elaine's boyfriend, Putty, painted his face for a hockey game and he scared the priest by screaming "WE'RE THE DEVILS!!!" "DON'T MESS WITH THE DEVILS!!"? Well that's what Sting looks like, but with a goatee.
(10-26-98)I watched that piece of shit PPV, Halloween Havoc, and I physically got sick from watching Hogan "fight" the Warrior. That had to be the WORST match I ever saw. Hogan tried to throw a fireball but fucked up and he hit his own face. Then Horseshit cost the Warrior the match by hitting him in the back with a chair. Why is Horse with Hogan? Didn't Hogan beat the shit out of him? It's a good thing I have access to a "magical" cable box or I would of been sooooooooooo pissed off, so this is for everyone who paid to see that: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
(10-28-98)I'm gonna get that new WCW game this week or next week. Yes, I know I hate WCW but the games are pretty good, plus I can beat the shit out of Goldberg all day. I'm sick of kicking DDP and Bichoff's ass, plus in this new game Larry Zybisco is in it and we all know he's due for an ass whuppin'.
(10-28-98)I forgot to mention this on Sunday, but I wasn't feeling good after watching Hogan/Warrior II. Now we know that Saturn was in the army, but after seeing him with that vest I wonder if he was really an army guy. I thought they didn't let gays in the military. I mean did he steal one of Shawn Michael's vests?
(10-28-98)Kenny Kaos? Kenny FUCKING KAOS is Rick Stiners partner? Can someone please tell me why he is one half of the tag team champions in WCW? I'm serious here, can one of the three people who come here explain to me the logic of Kenny Kaos being Rick Stiners partner, because I just can't figure it out.
(10-28-98)Al Snow and Mankind have the potential to be the greatest tag team ever. Hell, they don't even have to wrestle, just let them do interviews. How can you not like a guy talking to a head and a fat guy, who looks like someone's crazy uncle who fought in Vietnam and got sprayed with Agent Orange and came back all crazy, talking to a sock? That is comedy, my friends.
(10-29-98)I'm watching Beavis and Butt-Head's Halloween and I found out where Mankind got Mr. Socko from. There's this church guy and he has a sock puppet named, yes you guessed it SOCKO!!! That sucks.
(10-30-98)Why is Rob Van Dam still called "Mr. Monday Night"? When was the last time he was on RAW? It was like two years ago, I think it's time for a new nick name.
(10-30-98)HA! Van Dam trew a chair to Sabu and it hit him right in the face. Sabu can't even catch a chair with out killing himself.
(10-30-98)The ECW soundtrack has the Sandman on the cover, it's too bad he's in WCW now. You think they would of made up a new cover but I guess ECW is too poor to pay for a new cover.
(10-30-98)Why does the ECW television title look like the old WWF world title?
(10-30-98)HA! After the Dudley's beat Sabu and Van Dam for the tag titles, Sabu was throwing chairs at them and they almost hit this dude in a wheelchair. The guy must of shit his pants because he couldn't move. That's a shame.
(10-30-98)Did anyone see that magician show on Thursday? They made a big deal out of the guy taking off his mask and it was some guy I never even heard of. He took off the mask and he was like "Yes, it is I, the great Valintino" and I'm like "who is this fucker"? He's just some bitter magician who couldn't get a real job so he told us all how to do the tricks. I just wish he didn't tell us who he is because those shows were pretty cool bacause now some crazed magician will kill him and pull his severed head out of a hat. I can't wait until Sunday when those wrestlers tell us how to take a chair shot, I'm gonna walk around trying to get people to hit me with a chair and I'll just shrug it off and kick their ass.
(10-30-98)ECW kicks ass but if you go to a live show you better get ringside seats because the general admission seats suck. I went to two ECW shows and the first time we(my brother,dad,and me) got ringside seats and you can see everything, but the second time we could only get general admission and I ended up behind this big ass pole and I couldn't see shit.
(10-30-98)I remember a couple of weeks ago the Franchise said "CUT THE FUCKING MUSIC" and they didn't bleep out "FUCK". I just thought that was funny.
(10-30-98)How come Francine wears thongs and clothes with her boobs hanging out but Sunny doesn't? When was the last time we saw Sunny in a thong? They should just always show her ass, screw the wrestling we just want her to show her ass.
(10-30-98)I like it how ECW fills their guitars with powder to show the inpact. So if you want a guitar shot to look cool just fill it up with powder. Just another helpful hint.
(10-30-98)I love it how ECW gets all these giant guys just so they can get beat by Spike Dudley in 30 seconds.
(10-30-98)Finally, they showed Sunny's ass!! She beat up Tammy Lynn Bytch and her ass popped out. WOO HOO!!
(10-30-98)You gotta love a name like Tammy Lynn Bytch, I mean you have Tammy Lynn Sytch(a.k.a. Sunny) and you have an evil slut who is fueding with her so you call her Tammy Lynn Bytch. It just doesn't get any funnier than that.
(10-30-98)Don't you hate it when you have to wipe your ass after you fart? Not that it's ever happened to me before.
(10-31-98)I just got WCW/nWo REVENGE and it's a pretty good game. The moves are the same as WCW vs nWo WORLD TOUR, but there are a shit load more wrestlers in it.
(10-31-98)On the ride home from the store(Funcoland), I opened the box and inside you get a poster of WCW Nitro for N64 and on the other side is the cover of REVENGE. But since it had Goldberg on it, I threw it out the window.
(10-31-98)The referee, Mark Curtis, sounds like Count Chocula. I never knew Count Chocula had cancer. That must be how Frankenberry and Booberry died.
(10-31-98)Jericho is the best person in this game. He acts just like the real one. He struts around, blows kisses, does that pin where he puts one foot on the guy and screams "COME ON BABY!". It's great. And if you beat a guy with that pin he jumps around like he won the lottery.
(10-31-98)The weapons are HUGE, there is a suitcase and it's as big as the guy you're beating up. It's like someone's smuggling midgets in them. Maybe that's what happened to the minis.
(10-31-98)One of the things I don't like is the wrestlers hardly make any noise. I liked Nash's scary noise he made when he was kicking ass in WORLD TOUR.
(10-31-98)I thought managers were in this game? During DDP's entrance, Kimberly didn't walk out. I wanted to beat her stupid face in for marrying DDP. Stupid slut.
(10-31-98)The music SUCKS ASS, it's better to just turn down the volume and whistle your favorite theme song, because the music sucks shit.
(10-31-98)Everyone's animation is great. When you pick your guy you can watch them do their little dances and poses. Buff does his dance, La Parka does his dance, Hogan plays air guitar, and Konnan grabs his nuts. It's pretty cool.
(10-31-98)When I was fighing Alex Write and all of a sudden Chris Benoit comes running out to kick my ass. As soon as I learn how to get people to help me everyone's gonna shit their pants, including me.
(10-31-98)I wonder why Mongo's not in here. Oh, I see it's because he sucks.
(10-31-98)When you get a guy in a submission move they make these farting noises, it's funny.
(10-31-98)Goldberg should only be able to fight for 30 seconds then he dies of a heart attack, it'll be just like the real thing. Oh and Goldberg lost 26 times. He sucks.
(10-31-98)In the back of the instruction booklet there is a catalog of WCW crap and there is a Bret Hart shirt and he's in front of an American flag. Doesn't he realize he's from Canada? I guess that's because he was anti-American in the WWF so genius Bichoff thought if he put a Canadian next to an American flag, the stupid wrestling fans would forget. And he's right.
(10-31-98)If you have a Nintendo 64, buy this game, even if you have WORLD TOUR. You can trade WORLD TOUR in and you can get like 50 cents, then use that money to get it.
(11-01-98)Here's another funny moment brought to you by my brother. We were playing the battle royal in WCW/nWo REVENGE and out comes Fat Finley and he says "Is that Zip?" So I say "yeah that's Zip, he's in the nWo, the black and green nWo, yeah that's it." And he believed me, then distracted because his brain can only compute one thing at a time, I eliminated him.
(11-01-98)Steve Regal has one of the greatest theme songs ever, it's right up there with Slick's theme.
(11-01-98)And Kama's music kicks ass too, it's like that movie "I'm Gonna Git You Sucka" when that dude won the pimp of the year. "My bitch better have my money, through rain or sleet or snow. My ho better have my money, not some, not half but all my cash."
(11-01-98)It was funny when Terry Funk admitted he beats the shit out of his wife and kids.
(11-01-98)Funk is great because when he got hit by the Meanie he was supposed to go through the table but it didn't break so he stood on it and knocked himself through it. If at first you don't succeed, try and try again.
(11-01-98)This was the first time I ever saw Nova and the Meanie wrestle in a match that doesn't turn into a dance contest.
(11-01-98)What the hell is with the ECW referee's shirts?
(11-01-98)HA! They called Big Dick Dudley "The one-eyed monster", because he used to wear an eye-patch. Now that's comedy.
(11-01-98)Sunny's the greatest referee I ever saw, her ass was all over the place. But most of the time her ass would face the wrong camera and all we would see is Storm and Lynn fight, and that's not good. I mean if her ass is facing camera 2 then why are they using camera 3?
(11-01-98)How long has Joel "I'm young, I'm hung and I'm skilled with my tongue" Gertner worn that neckbrace? He had that damn thing on forever. And what is that dance he does? It's another unsolved mystery of wrestling, like that thing Val Venis' does with his arms. What the hell is that? I want to see a real porn star do that, the chick would be sucking his dick and he'll start flapping his arms. That would be funny.
(11-01-98)Damn, Jake "the Snake" looks like shit. Before he moved slow because he was methodical, now he's slow because he's a fat old man. But his DDT kicked ass, nobody does a DDT like Jake "the Snake".
(11-01-98)Remember when the One Man Gang was Akeem? He was supposed to be an African prince, but he's really this fat, white dude from Jersey. But his manager was Slick (the greatest manager ever), so he had the Slick's theme song (the greatest theme song). Plus he did this thing with his arm but it wasn't to the rhythm of the song so he looked like this fat, white dude from Jersey. Slick was a "Jive Soul Bro", and he always lied to his friends, and he would never get nothing in the end. Why late last night he was messing with this woman that was 7 feet tall, NOW THAT WAS A BIGGGGGG WOMAN.
(11-01-98)Why did ECW honor the Sandman for leaving? So let me get this straight, if you sellout you get honored? Well then I love Iraq, viva Saddam. Seigheil. Now give me a medal.
(11-01-98)What the fuck was with the Franchise's robe? It sucked.
(11-01-98)I liked the Triple Threat's interview, because the Franchise kept on saying how they are all friends and that they'll be the Triple Threat forever. Didn't Bam Bam just for WCW? Now the Franchise looks like a jackass. Well he does wearing that stupid robe.
(11-01-98)Francine was topless during that interview, that was good, but her back was turned, that was bad. She turned around though, that was good, but she put the heavyweight belt over her boobs, that was bad. She did wear a thong later that night, that was good, but they hardly showed her ass, that was bad.
(11-01-98)It's funny when Francine pounds on the ring to rally the Triple Threat, but it always starts a "SHOW YOUR TITS" chant.
(11-02-98)The booker on Wrestling's Greatest Secrets looked like Dusty Rhodes. And I know it was Harley Race, but damn his head looks like a giant pumpkin. His fake voice kicked ass though.
(11-02-98)The wrestler's were names were great. Ben Hurt, Brash Knuckles, All American Boy, that's some funny stuff. And who was that Dr.Doom guy?
(11-02-98)The narrator sucked ass, it was annoying how he kept on saying how it was all a "scam" and that the ref was part of the "con". Then he said something like those two lugs couldn't remember the script, so they tell each other what to do.
(11-02-98)When was the last time you saw a wrestler rip up some kids autograph book? And that kid was a shitty actor, he didn't look pissed, he looked like a jackass.
(11-02-98)Stunt granny? I remember when this old lady was yelling at Hogan and she kept on poking him in the chest and Hogan just walked away. I would of punched her so hard it would knock her false teeth out of her ass.
(11-02-98)I didn't like it how they kept on saying that the fans don't know it's fake, and we're all fooled. I always knew it was fake, hell my five year old sister knows it's fake. Not all wrestling fans are inbred retards who sleep with their daddy's sister and drive pick-up trucks...well not me anyway.
(11-02-98)Oh, I finally found the managers in WCW/nWo REVENGE. Here you have to play an Exhibition match and then you get to see the managers. I beat the shit out of Jimmy Hart, that's what he gets for making such shitty theme songs. I'm sure there's some magical code so you can be the managers, I want to see Rick Rude's "one nut neck-breaker", Vincent's patented "The only reason I have a job is because I let Bichoff fuck me in the ass, then it's my turn to do him" and Kimberly's "I married DDP for his money, because it damn sure ain't his personality or looks".
(11-06-98)Now Hogan is "running for president", didn't Mr. Bob Backlund do that a couple years ago? Can't Bishoff think of anything original? The answer is NO FUCKING WAY!
(11-06-98)I'm starting to like Ernest Miller. He's just so stupid that he's becoming funny. It's like the Killer Tomatoes Movies, they suck so bad that they're funny. Just like Ernest Miller.
(11-06-98)There's a fucking mouse in my house. I want to catch it in a bucket, fill it with water, freeze it, then shatter it with a hammer. That would be pretty sweet.
(11-06-98)The only reason Mankind got a belt is to shut up everyone who's been bitching and moaning that he should get a title. Including me. And it's a real title because Mr. McMahon gave it to him.
(11-06-98)WCW needs an evil announcer. Because they have 3 face announcers and it gets old with them talking shit about the badguys. Bobby Heenen tries to but fat ass Tony yells at him before he gets to say anything. At least in the WWF JR doesn't yell at the King for liking the badguys.
(11-06-98)I read that Goldberg will be in the movie "Universal Soldier II" which is bullshit because there is already a part II, hell there's already a part III. So whoever "reported" that is a jackass.
(11-06-98)What the hell is that dog thing on "Pee-Wee's Playhouse"?
(11-06-98)The WWF should get Pee Wee, they can say the movie he was jerking off to was a Val Venis movie and he's pissed at Val for being such a good porn star because he got arrested.
(11-06-98)Regal has to get some new clothes, he just need to get rid of those shorts and put some damn pants on to cover his red knee pads and boots. His song still kicks ass though.
(11-06-98)In the Nov. 10th issue of the Weekly World News there is an article about how Abe Lincoln was the first pro wrestler and that he used to wear "outrageous costumes and trapped oppenents in the Lincoln Leglock" and there's a funny picture of his head on Hulk Hogan's body. You should read it, it's pretty funny.
(11-06-98)I was watching Shotgun the other night and during the "Slam Jam" Doc Hendrix said that in Philly on November 29th Cactus Jack will be there. I wonder if Mankind will go back to Jack or if it's just a dark match?
(11-06-98)If Cactus Jack does come back then he's the one who stole Mr. Socko. Because he's a different personality from Mankind so he could of done it without Mankind knowing. It's like one of the newer episodes of the Batman cartoon when Two-Face becomes "the Judge" and Two-Face didn't even know it was him because it was a whole different personality.
(11-10-98)Ugh, does Bischoff have any originality? Not only are they ripping off Mr. Bob Backlund running for president, now the "president" will be at Nitro. God damn that's such a blatant ripoff of the WWF it's not even funny.
(11-10-98)IS Kaz Hisushi WCW's answer to TAKA?
(11-10-98)How much do you want to bet that WCW forgets all about Hogan running for president by next year?
(11-10-98)The Juvi-driver? Oh, Lord.
(11-10-98)HAHAHAHAHA Alex Write is fighting Barry Horowitz HAHAHAHA THE NAZI VS THE JEW HAHAHAHAHAHA!!
(11-10-98)Why didn't the Wolfpac kick Barry's ass? They suck.
(11-10-98)Don't people know that La Raza means race power? What a bunch of racists.
(11-10-98)Now you know there is a mouse in my house, and we have glue traps all around the place. So I'm sleeping and I hear this scratching noise and I wake up to see the mouse with the glue trap stuck to his tail. It was the greatest thing I ever saw, that mouse was shitting his pants. But while I was laughing at him, he got away.
(11-10-98)HAHAHAHA!! LOOK AT BISCHOFF'S HAIR HAHAHAHA!!! HE LOOKS LIKE A LITTLE BOY HAHAHAHAH!!
(11-10-98)Why would you get that Lego robot thing to take pictures of your naked mom? That's pretty sick.
(11-10-98)If the Disciple is his own man then why is he with the Warrior, and why is his name the Disciple? Isn't a disciple someone who follow's someone?
(11-10-98)I bet the president will be Hogan.
(11-10-98)I wish my uncle would shut the fuck up. He live's upstairs from me and this asshole sings all day. It is now 8:13 am and he's been singing since 6, he's such a retard.
(11-10-98)HA! I like Mean Gene's reporter trench coat.
(11-10-98)Why the fuck does Zbyscio keep on doing his stupid bow?
(11-10-98)See, I was right, the "president" was Hogan.
(11-10-98)Oh God, Hogan's dressed like Jesse the Body.
(11-10-98)Is everyone on Jesse's nuts or what?
(11-10-98)I like how Bret said that Luger was "crying about what happened last week". Bret's still crying about what happened LAST YEAR!
(11-10-98)I used to like Konnan but that music video ruined that.
(11-10-98)Did you ever notice that every rap video has someone rapping in a car, in front of a crowd, and them just walking around?
(11-10-98)HAHAHAHA!! Bischoff called Hogan the People's President, and it started a "ROCKY, ROCKY" chant. HAHAHA!!
(11-10-98)How embarassing is it to get beat up by Bischoff? Those guys should kill themselves.
(11-10-98)NOOOOOOO NOT PIPER!!!! OH DEAR GOD, PLEASE DON'T BRING PIPER BACK. I'm not a religous person but I will pray to God just to keep Piper away.
(11-10-98)OH NO, Scott Steiner better watch out, it's Chris Adams. HAHAHAHAHA!!
(11-10-98)Why is Scott afraid of Rick? Scott would murder him.
(11-10-98)Skevontee just said that he had an autograph signing. Who the FUCK wants his autograph?
(11-10-98)OH man, I hope Scott kills Judy Bagwell.
(11-10-98)HA! Buff's mom said she used to beat him when he was younger. He should get her arrested.
(11-10-98)Jericho said the Goldberg chant sounds like the Boring chant. He's right.
(11-10-98)Goldberg is a cheapshot. If he's so damn tough then why did he hit Jericho when he wasn't ready?
(11-10-98)Kane has a shitty aim. It must be from his fucked up eye.
(11-10-98)Mankind's getting a Jenny Jones makeover.
(11-10-98)The Blue Blazer looks like Captain America on crack.
(11-10-98)OH NO, they shaved Mankind's beard. Now he doesn't look like someone's crazy uncle, he looks like someone's normal, fat dad.
(11-10-98)I wouldn't like D'Lo that much if he didn't do that strut to the ring.
(11-10-98)When Debra talked it seems like she was trying to cover up her southern accent.
(11-10-98)"Do you know who used to live on that foot?" HAHA! Mankind is the funniest person in wrestling.
(11-10-98)That Double J/Goldust fight backstage looked like the Razor Ramon/Goldust fight.
(11-10-98)I thought Mankind was taking a fall from the top of the ramp, but I was wrong.
(11-10-98)Survior Series should be called "Screw You" instead of Deadly Game.
(11-10-98)"The Rock has been attacked, the Rock has been attacked, we'll have more when we come back!" HA! Michael Cole is Dr. Suess.
(11-10-98)Hey, the Head stole Socko so I guess I was wrong. It would of been better if Cactus Jack stole him though.
(11-10-98)HA! They showed a closeup of the Head and Mr. Socko is stapled to it's...well Head.
(11-10-98)I think the Head just scored.
(11-10-98)The Brood kick ass. But where was Gangrel's blood? And what the hell is he laughing at? Shouldn't we be laughing at him for marrying Luna?
(11-10-98)Damn, did you see when Kane was going to chokeslam Terri Runnels? He had his fingers buried up her ass.
(11-10-98)When did Kane become a luchadore?
(11-10-98)I liked it how Kane turned a attemted triple homicide into a quadruple homicide.
(11-10-98)If Kane can shoot fireballs then why does he need a blowtorch?
(11-10-98)It looks like the WWF watched the Secrets of Pro Wrestling. We had Mankind's speech last week and Kane beating up the "fan" this week. What's next week someone ripping up some little boy's autograph book?
(11-10-98)I wish the Bossman kicked Shane's whining ass.
(11-10-98)Why didn't Austin beat up McMahon? He ran right by him.
(11-10-98)Why is the People's Elbow the Rock's finisher? It's just an elbow drop for cryin' out loud.
(11-10-98)Mr. McMahon getting the People's Elbow was the funniest thing I ever saw.
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