First of all, let's not get this confused with the 1995 laugh-a-thon known as Chuck Norris's HELLBOUND. There is no terrible choreography by an old white dude with a beard, and we can all be thankful for that. However, this IS a review for what's the beginning of what would become a string of disappointing sequels for Clive Barker's original masterpiece of torture and obsessive body piercing, HELLBOUND us considered by many of my associates to be just as good as the original HELLRAISER , if not better. This hallucination is usually due to the use of more Cenobite footage, giving them a more prominent feature in this film than the last. At the same time, HELLBOUND does NOT take away from the whole "the real villain has no flesh and is manipulating someone to kill others with the promise of sex" scenario... that doesn't really sound as clear as I was attempting to make it, but since I'm too lazy to utilize my mind to think of a better format through which to express my emotions (or to utilize my finger into using the damn "Backspace" key), I'll let the statement sit where it stands... "sit where it stands"?! Now there's my biggest contradiction of the day...

Our sequel opens as a military man (possibly a World War 2 Colonel) plays with the now infamous HELLRAISER puzzle box. Like everyone else who comes in contact with the demonic rubix cube, the guy winds up full of sharp metal objects and dragged into Hell, where he's transformed into none other than the painfully pierced Cenobite leader, here called "Pinhead" for the first time. After that little originic (probably not a real word) opening, we pick up where the first film left off. Our heroine Kirsty awakens in a hospital bed at the local loony-bin, where she's assaulted right away by questions fired from a nosy reporter demanding answers as to just what the fuck happened at the conclusion of HELLRAISER! Meanwhile the overzealous Dr. Channard, one of the hospital's resident psychologists, is very interested in unraveling the "puzzles" of the mind. 20-to-1 says these "puzzles" can be solved in box form... Ladies and Gentlemen, say hello to our villain.

During her stay at the nut house, Kirsty meets a puzzle solving shut-in who stays in the room next to hers. The girl's name is Tiffany, and her mother left her in Channard's care in the hopes that Tiff's psychological problems could be cleared up (she recently stopped speaking). Obviously well aware of the Cenobites and their little toy, Channard gets his hands on the bloody mattress recovered from Kirsty's house. Using a fresh psychopath from his personal stash, Channard sacrifices the unknowing patient upon the soiled bed cushion. This resurrects Kirsty's wicked whore stepmother Julia, just like Julia first summoned her sadistic brother-in-law Frank in HELLRAISER. And, just like Frank, Julia comes completely fleshless, recruiting Channard to lure unsuspecting victims to her so she can kill them and throw together a new skin for herself. Watching the whole disturbing act from behind a curtain is young Dr. Kyle, who had been listening to Kirtsy's ramblings of people without skin and bald dudes with nails in their heads. With this undeniable evidence presented to him, the handsome young physician decides to help Kirsty before Channard and Julia kill more people, or worse, bring about Hell on Earth... which actually has to wait till HELLRAISER III. Dr. Kyle's help doesn't last long though, because while he's snooping around Channard's office like one of Scooby-Doo and the gang, Julia snuffs him out and makes him part of her new Ralph Lauren "body suit"... kinda reminds me of SKINNER. It's not long before Channard is abusing Tiff's puzzle solving skills, using her to solve the mystery of the evil golden jack-in-the-box... and I'm not talking about poisonous fast food.

When Tiff unlocks the box, the Cenobites arrive right on time for dinner. Chan and Julia escape into Hell, where she gives the good doctor a guided tour. As for Kirsty and Tiff, they too explore the cold stone mazes of the Underworld. That's right, Hell isn't all "lakes of fire" and "guys in pajamas sticking pitchforks in my butt" and all that showy biblical crap. Hell is just a big stone maze like the Labyrinth in the David Bowie muppet orgy of the same name. No searing geysers of molten pain, just a bunch of alleyways and corridors attuned to subject everyone to their own personal torments... a big let down isn't it? Well, not to worry children, because the real purgatory is for more glamorous! Like what Las Vegas would've looked like during the Spanish Inquisition! So not to worry kids, Hell really IS as much as fun as everyone says it is! Anyway, Julia introduces Chan to Leviathan: the lord of this enigmatic Hell. Levy really just looks like a big black diamond, which again isn't the real thing, because when you get to the real afterlife of torture and agony you'll be lorded over by the dark god of flair and showmanship: Rip Taylor! Now THAT is eternal agony with style! What a class act. Well, Levy turns Channard into a Cenobite while Kirsty's personal Hell requires her to have a another run in with her perverted uncle Frank once again. She escapes though when Julia gets her revenge and rips out the fetish freak's heart. But, Julia's time is at hand when she too gets sucked back to her own Hell, torn right out of her new skin! Kirs and Tiff meet back up and escape back to reality... with Dr. Chan not far behind!

With his newfound demonic powers, Channard goes psychotic, breaking his Hippocratic Oath and slaughtering the hospital tenants with tendrils wielding many sharp tools of murderous intent... and some that have, uhm, flowers and fingers... This selfish massacre does not go unnoticed though, as the other Cenobites arrive to take out Channard for abusing the powers given to him by Leviathan. But, it appears that Dr. C is too much even for Pinhead and his posse, as the fiendish doctor flexes his powers and kills all four of the monsters with ease, including their pin cushion of a leader. Now, with no one in his way, Channard is on the verge of bringing Hell on Earth! Only our tasty little duo can stop the crazy lookin' bastard now, which they do by solving the Leviathan puzzle. Channard is destroyed, the Gates of Hell are closed and the way is paved for boy bands, white rap artists and Dr. Laura... are they sure they got that puzzle right?!

So, it's all over. I felt the first HELLRAISER was darker and had a much more corrupt atmosphere to it, especially thanks to that dirtbag Frank, who was much more self indulgent and deviant than Julia. Though I like more Cenobite action, Channard wasn't as enjoyable as Pinhead and his crew. Fat men in leather are always a scare, and I found the Cenobite showdown to be all too short and less than action packed. Blah, what a waste. I give credit to the make-up FX crew though, despite the weak characterization of the demons. The opening segment was also very misleading, as I was expecting some kind of origin story that would focus on Pinhead. Instead, he and his pals remain second hand characters, just like they were in HELLRAISER, only this time they were shown up by Channard who, as I love to mention, I do not like. Director Tony Randel would later go on to do an AMITYVILLE flick, that crazy Clint Howard vehicle TICKS and the martial arts live action FIST OF THE NORTH STAR, never quite reaching beyond his grasp of mediocracy. Oh well, at least some HELLRAISER fans can still find enjoyment in it, even if it's not one of my favorite sequel films. If you didn't think 93 minutes was enough, then don't worry kiddies, because they have an eternity to know your flesh...

Also Known As: HELLRAISER II

Sequels: HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH; HELLRAISER: BLOODLINES; HELLRAISER: INFERNO

If You Liked This Flick, Check Out: DAY OF THE DEAD or A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: DREAM WARRIORS