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Reviews For Sept. 13- Sept. 20

1. **** "Marching Men" By Bill Truax
   Very Good message. Well Put. Quite a price to pay for being able to do, what we are doing right now. I give this a 4! Jack Mann

2. **** "Isle In The Sky" By Bill Truax
   Deep but interesting look at one's own death! Makes you think. I give it a 4 Jack Mann

3. ***** "My Wife, My Lover, My Friend" by Jack Mann
   I think Jack did a wonderful job on this poem. I am sure his wife and family MUST be proud. Kimberly Owens

4. ***** "Holidays" by Jack Mann
   I was very impressed to see that Jack felt this way about the season of Christmas. Too many people take it and make it into a how much you can give and how much you can get thing. That's not was Christ's Birthday is all about. Kimberly

5. ***** "How To Nurture A Violent-Free Child" by Peggy Butler
   The article is informative, well-written and straight to the point. John Slater

6. ***** "Silent Invader"by Emily Janiak
   Poem has impact. Fear and anxiety well communicated. Hope is also in this writing. It's clear that personal experience precipitated the verse. Dynamite. Bob Charles

7. ***** Fairy Tales By Diana Keeton
   Upon second reading I enjoy this story for new reasons, one being the richness of language. I wouldn't change the vocabulary at all! ('guess different reviewers have different views) PJ

8. *** What Am I Series: Obvious By Jessica Sayer
   The poem grew in strength as you went on. Certain lines really hit hard---sorry, my lights just went out---they were more to the end. Title alludes me, as does meaning of the poem, but it certainly interests me. Have an idea of what it's about. Not sure. Know one thing for sure: keep writing. Remember, though, who is reading your work? If--and you don't have to care, but if you care about the reader, then make theme clear. Hope to read more of your work. Gerri

9. ***** "Gazer" By Ashley Presutto
   "Gazer" got better and better as it went on--poem was good from the start--even your daddy's kiss couldn't help, huh? good images, esp. towards ends. great piece. Gerri

10. *** A Taste Of Your Love by Mandy Gommel
    A taste of love, huh, guess that's all you got. Great title. I get the feeling that it's not over yet. Good piece, evoked emotions from me. Keep going. Gerri

11. *** This World By Verdago
    Life certainly seems as if it sucks at times, doesn't it? Through poetry such as yours, perhaps people will take the time to see how much life can hurt, and perhaps you can make a change. Write down more details if you can next time, if you feel you might want to try it and keep writing until they listen. Gerri

12. ***** The Window By Robyn Porter
    It started slow, but that's the beauty of it. It pulls you in and soon you are feeling all the things the author feels as she looks out the window at this little boy. You are right there as she moves to the window and experience the same confusion as she realizes that something very different from what she imagined is happening out there. Really intrigueing story. Carol Franks

13. ***** A Woman To Remember By Roderick Young
    Very well done. This author has the unique ability to clearly tell a story. It's the little things that count. Jack Mann

14. ***** The Window By Robyn Porter
    The narrative drew me into the story. I was impressed with the author's ability to grab my attention, as had the event grabbed her attention. Her style was casual, but concise. Although she provided an ending, I was able to allow my mind to capture other endings and applications. A very good story. Ronald Youngdale

15. ***** The Window By Robyn Porter
    Robyn paints a picture with words -- all the activity of the playground with children running about engaged in different activities. In addition, she zeroes in on one child and speculates on his thoughts and feelings. For that brief moment we walk in his Nikes. Well done! Cathleen Jones

16. *** "Hug Them Now" By Alice Bateman
    You bring to the page a universal theme--they are zooming out of the womb one minute, moving away the next. You have an experience that other women are starting to have, too, and that's having them move in with Dad. I'd find-tune piece. Write it again and again--try to say it in a different way--like your POV--maybe put out more of your feelings--play with it---revise--it's worth the time. Gerri

17. ** Falling In Love By Toni Boyer
    Toni--You offer the reader an interesting line, "You accept me as I am." Embelish on that. Are you jealous? Have flaws? The idea of poem is good, but bring something to it that others, that say the same thing, lacks. Develop that line. Make this piece stronger. Keep writing. Gerri

18. *** Drowning In FearBy Samantha Mullen
    Interesting theme---or, interesting how fear colors life--you do mention writing things down-journaling---like content of piece--might want to do something with fear itself---write how fear presents itself,smells like, etc. Gerri

19. ***** People Of The Wind By Kristen Nutter
    Well done--like images--like what you and said, and for the most, part, how you said it--closing is excellent--one hint--don't switch perspective from "you" to "we"--you mention we in next to last stanza--and, proofread--nice piece. Enjoyable. g.

20. ***** For Ken By Emily Janiak
    I think this poem is easy for anyone to relate to, especially in the arena of failed love, or love of someone who doesn't return it. I think she wrote this eloquently and with grace, and showed her truest emotion. Good work! Amy Savidge

21. **** Silent Invader By Emily Janiak
    Very powerful. And described very well. You do great work, and you've made me think about my own humanity and it's finite state. Amy Savidge

22. **** Inspiration By Bill Elder
    Truly an Inspirational poem. Gets right to the point! Might not be a bad idea to have installed. Would surely improve the quality of output. LOL Jack Mann

23. ***** The Window By Robyn Porter
    She touched the heart with her description of the small boy. The story had an upbeat ending especially with the boy being the giver of hope in how he touched her without knowing it. Bette Manning

24. **** Fear Of Loss By Wayne Stone
    I felt something when I read this poem, that's what I look for. I mainly focus on the way a writer expresses his/herself and if it sounds true to the heart. Brian Wilkinson

25. ***** Silent Invader By Emily Janiak
    Silent invader deeply touched me. I hope it's not a true story. Brian Wilkinson

26. ** Inspiration By Bill Elder
    Although I don't understand how the title fits with the poem, I found his writing rather interesting. This piece has a military flavor to it. Occasionally, I think it helps to hear from the author what his/her inspiration was. Raye McDonald

27. ***** Sunny Sunday Morning By Raye McDonald
    Raye, this is a very beautiful poem. You have a talent for putting an everyday situation into lyrical verse that evokes emotion. The sign of a very good poet. Alice In Wordland

28. ***** My Piano By Raye McDonald
    The author's words reflect an intimate and loving relationship with the object of her adoration. Bill Elder

29. ***** "My Piano" By Raye McDonald
    Very professional, vivid and to the point. Very well written. Flows well. To take a piece of furniture and make something so beautiful out of it is truly a gift. Jack Mann

30. *** "How To Nurture A Violent-Free Child" By Peggy Butler
    Very good and valuable information but somewhat stiff and formal in presentation. Using point form is great in a business proposal, but in a column tends to make it more like reading a report than entertaining - which is what a colmn should do. Bruce Longman

31. * My Wife, My Lover, My Friend By Jack Mann
    For me sentiments like this aren't prompted by such a quick rhyme scheme; it seems to trivialize the message. PJ

32. ***** Hug Them Now By Alice Bateman
    This rhyme pattern is longer than in another poem about family, thus conveying the sentiments in greater depth. 'Seems to me it would've made a good song, although I had just thought the repetition of the first stanza was simply good writing. ( I hadn't thought of it as music.) I'm sorry you didn't even get a reply from the singer. How rude. Her people should've taken a second look. PJ

33. ***** For Ken by Emily Janiak
    Ouch! This hits a little too close to home, Emily. So I guess that means you captured the experience well with your writing! PJ

34. ** Mother In-law by Jack Mann
    The rhyming is too sing-song for my preferences. Nice to have something positive about mothers-in-law, though. PJ

35. *** SDM by Roderick Young
    I enjoy your story-telling. The ending was just so abrupt. I wanted more. PJ

36. *** Angel by Eric Spitty
    I don't understand the purpose of the asterisks, and the first two paragraphs seemed forced. But the rest was from your heart; it was so very touching....I'm sorry for your loss. ... I'm glad you see your angel in a new way. I see my daughter in everything I do now. It helps ease the hurt. PJ

37. **** To My Little Girl by Jack Mann
    This one evoked more meaning (to me) than Mr. Mann's other poems. The rhyming did not seem so contrived. While I would prefer serious topics, deep emotion, be written with deeper, more serious rhyming or non-rhyming poetry, this one works. PJ

38. *** Karen by Alice Bateman
    The topic is so serious, too serious for this rhyme. Some of it seems contrived (ex, "did you turn into a dove?" - the idea is there, but the rhyme trivializes it). I like your poetry; just wished you didn't work so hard at rhyming this one. PJ

39. **** They Danced by Sherry Ermish
    A very moving, heartfelt poem. Could flow a little smoother but well done. Jack Mann

40. ***** Silent Invader by Emily Janiak
    Excellant!! This author goes to the heart, her heart and communicates her deepest fears with a refreshing honesty. Two Thumbs Up!!! Liz Broach

41. ***** Bumpy by R.L. Walker
    Another winner. A very deep and meaningful subject in a simple poetic form. Well done. Jack Mann